Krieg
by Anarkyrie42
Summary: Two Spartans go missing. A year later, the UNSC is finally able to get close enough. They send a team down, comprised of a few Spartans, an AI, some ODST's, a Pandoran native and an ex-Spartan wetwork asset. But Jack's got his own A-Team troops to get in their way. Action, adventure, peril and romance (?)! Updates Wednesdays.
1. Chapter 1

DEAR READER (: this part would look better written in crayon),

Ok, so this is my first x-over fanfic posted (and a re-write of the original first chapter).

This is a Borderlands x Halo x Red vs Blue x-over, taking place in the _Borderlands_ "world" in the _Halo_ timeline.

For my newcomers, I'll say this once: I'm not NOT **_NOT_** pairing Spartans together in this fanfiction. There will be pairings involving Spartans, though. :)  
Pairings: Gaige x Axton x Carolina, Roland (the AI) x Angel, Kelly-087 x Brick, Roland (the human) x Lilith

Uuuh... there'll be swearing and fluff, no lemon, and definitely death. So, y'all've been warned.

Uh, yeah and also I don't own anyone that you recognize, clearly, since I'm writing fanfiction about it. If I did own Halo and Borderlands, there'd be a crossover that isn't _Destiny, _most definitely. And at least one or two Spartans would've defected and gone to run some kind of mercenary crime ring on Pandora and be filthy f**king rich and secretly funding the development of a Spartan legion.

But that's a story for another time, lol. :)

Enjoy~

Much love and respect,  
Anarkyrie

* * *

CHAPTER ONE

PANDORA  
_The Glass-Stone Plains  
Outside Hyperion Data Archive Installation 04  
_22.08.2558 (UNSC Calendar)  
There was the sound of gunfire and Fred dropped to a knee, ducking around behind the crumbling wall with John. "This is the last time I let ONI pick our vacation spot," Fred grunted, looking down at his bloodied hand. They'd been sent to Pandora on an ultra-black op. No ordnance drops, no back up, no exfiltration. Just the two of them versus Hyperion.

And now it was fairly safe to assume they might _die_ on Pandora.

"You hit, sir?" John asked, glancing at Fred. It was a dumb question. Blood welled between Fred's fingers and his breathing was ragged. John handed him a small Biofoam canister.

"How about this, huh? Going out on a goddamn dirt ball because I was too cocky to remember that I didn't have my fucking armor," Fred grunted, filling the bullet holes with the foam. He exhaled hard as the foam swelled, pushing against his organs and muscle as it filled the injury. John checked his pistol. Nine rounds. He was out of rifle ammo and he'd lost his knife somewhere along the line. He didn't even have a grenade.

"Do we really take our armor for granted that much?" he raised an eyebrow. Fred handed him another clip. Twelve rounds. Not much, but better than none. "What about you?"

"I got my knife," Fred replied.

"We got Bloodwing the data canister. We don't need to keep fighting. Just get away…"

"Did your balls drop off in your four years of cryo?" Fred hissed. "I'm supposed to be the pussy—I'm a Lieutenant. You're a goddamn NCO. And _you_ are getting away. I'll cover you."

"You'll get yourself killed, Fred," John met his friend's gaze with sad eyes.

"Spartans never die."

John shook his head. Fred was so human. He could make light of anything. Maybe he was like that to remind all the Spartans to feel every so often. John couldn't imagine life without him. But he ran, charging his pistol as he stood. He took out one of the Engineers approaching him, and another of the Hyperion security guards. He heard metal on metal and glanced over his shoulder. Fred carved his knife through a man's breastplate, slashing the steel open. He turned and cut another security guard's throat. Then John saw the robot land between him and Fred. He heard gunfire and saw his friend fall.

John struck down on the next man with the butt of his pistol. He felt a sharp jolt to his tailbone, spiking right up to his implant. He lost control of his limbs and collapsed, twitching slightly with the shock of the electric stab. A man strolled around to face him and pushed his head to the side with his boot then squatted beside him.

"I just snapped you with a device that'll keep you from doing anything I don't want you to do," Jack—the CEO by murder of Hyperion—informed John. Then he laughed like a little kid at Christmas. "Ooh! Yes! My very own pet Spartan! And which one are you…?" He reached under John's collar and pulled out his dog tags. "A deactivated AI chip, huh…? Mm… Looks like someone had a crush on a pretty computer program… I'll just keep this until I feel like you deserve to have it back. Who are you…? John-117, huh? The Hero of the Covenant War? Ooh… Nice! Is it my birthday?" Jack stood back up and walked away. John swallowed, unable to do anything but lie there and stare. "Get up," Jack ordered. John's body moved automatically, standing up. He stood at attention—body waiting for Jack's next order, mind cursing himself and Jack alike. He couldn't even look back as he strode after Jack.

(V)

PANDORA  
_Sanctuary  
_23.08.2558 (UNSC Calendar)  
"They didn't make it…" Lilith echoed Mordecai's message. She sank down in her chair and took her head into her hands. Roland touched her shoulder and she swatted his hand away. Tannis and Moxxi both looked uncomfortable. Marcus stroked his beard.

"I was so sure those boys could handle it," Marcus said. "They could handle _Brick!_"

"There was more trouble than when I'd checked," Mordecai said. "I should've reconned more… If I'd been _on_ that facility…"

"You might be dead, too," Tannis said in one of her odd moments of clarity. She put a hand on Mordecai's arm. "It's not your fault the two Emerald Knights fell to the cruelty of the Gold Dragon of Capitalism."

"Spartans don't die…" Roland said with a bitter laugh. "That's what they told us in training when we were doing that little history class. Spartans don't die. They just go MIA."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Hyperion Slag Testing Facility  
_28.08.2558 (UNSC Calendar)  
Dr. Samuels paused as she approached the man strapped down to the table. He had open wounds on his torso and arms—cuts, burns and bullet holes. He seemed to be breathing fine, with the respirator attached to him, but according to the holographic chart, he'd been dosed with enough tranquilizer to knock out a pack of alpha skags. Dr. Samuels glanced over her shoulder at Jack, who stood there, just to the left of the doorway, arms crossed over his chest.

"Why's he so shredded up?" Dr. Samuels asked.

"Only way we could catch him," Jack shrugged. "He was a tough son of a bitch."

"Couldn't you at least tape him up?"

"Didn't have time to," Jack shrugged again. "The tranquilizers have only just kicked in. So, before he wakes up, start doing the thing, Sammy."

"Slag Experiment 107A with Prisoner 033112…"

(V)

SLIPSTREAM SPACE  
_En-route to Pandora  
The _UNSC Queen's Bishop  
20.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Captain Charles Rook cut an impressive figure. He was six-eight, all hard muscle and paper white skin. He looked like he was carved out of marble, with hard Roman features and cold stony eyes. Sergeant Salvador Ruiz had no doubt the man looked equally, if not more, formidable in his green titanic Spartan MJOLNIR armor. The suit that hung in his office in a glass case behind his chair.

The suit Salvador couldn't help staring at while he and his fellow NCO, Axton York, waited for the captain to return.

Salvador didn't know much about Axton. The man was an ODST, while Salvador was a marine. Axton must've heard the door. He stood, snapping to attention. Before he could get the words out, the captain's cool voice interrupted.

"As you were," the Spartan said. Axton dropped his salute. Another person joined them, sliding into position beside Axton. She was tall and lean—just shorter than the Captain—, dressed in the Spartan uniform. She had eyes like shards of jade and a cold look about her face. She had long black hair for a female Spartan II (barely long enough to be a pixie cut for a normal person) and her pale cheeks were dusted with freckles.

_Great, another one of these missions…_Salvador inwardly sighed, thinking he and Axton would just be support for a Spartan Op. The captain seemed to sense his disappointment and gave him a small, tight-lipped smile.

"Sergeant Ruiz, you're a Pandoran native, yes?" Rook continued.

"Yes, sir," Salvador felt a twisted combination of excitement and dread. What could the UNSC possibly want off of Pandora? Did they think the Eridian crap was important—like the Forerunners all the buzz had been about?

"Excellent," Rook said. "Gunnery Sergeant York will be leading a small task force onto Pandora, alongside Chief Petty Officer 086. Your purpose is to obtain any information on the Eridians. We believe they might have had something to do with the Forerunners at some point—another sentient species that lived alongside the Forerunners."

"So this is an ONI op, sir?" Axton asked, a twitch of apprehension in his voice. Rook nodded.

"Regrettably," he said. "During this op, you will also be responsible for recovering some UNSC… tech, as ONI so _neatly _put it."

"Sir, I'm curious… Is Dahl still in control of Pandora?" Salvador asked. Rook consulted one of the holographic screens. His expression was, as always, generally unreadable. He picked up his data pad and handed it to Salvador.

"Update yourself. We're dropping out of Slipspace in six hours."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Just outside planetary orbit  
The _UNSC Queen's Bishop  
_Observation deck A  
_20.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
"Madre de Dios," Salvador whistled when they saw the massive space station.

"What?" Axton fixed the cuff of his shirt. They were both dressed in Civvies. Salvador had torn a few holes in his t-shirt to make it look more Pandoran and wore his battered combat boots. Axton wouldn't let go of his cargos or combats, but he was comfortable wearing a plain brown button down, over his body suit, which he'd rolled the sleeves up on.

"Hyperion's been _busy,_" Salvador pointed at the space station. "According to the intel the Captain gave me they've seized the planet. Apparently the CEO, John Hanson, is trying to 'civilize' Pandora. I'm willing to bet it's like that Greek myth for him… The one with the guy and the rock."

"Sisyphus?" Axton raised an eyebrow. Salvador pulled a face.

"I hope he catches that," he snorted. Axton smiled and shook his head.

"No, that's the name of the guy with the rock."

"Unfortunate name," Salvador cracked a grin. Axton chuckled.

"This is your home world?"

Salvador turned at the new voice. A splash of disgust crossed 086 features as she saw the space station. She wore red Crimson Lance armor plates across her chest, legs and down her left arm over a grey shirt and black trousers. A second Spartan strode onto the deck behind her, wearing leather from the neck down. He fixed his glove, but did not look up.

"It's hot down there," Salvador warned. The taller of the two Spartan shrugged.

"My suit is climate controlled."

"We have our cover stories," 086 began, making Salvador raise an eyebrow at her Irish accent. "Ruiz, you were in prison on Crassus the last six years, York you were part of the Dahl Security Corps. You went AWOL rather than face execution and have been traveling as a merc the last several years. I'm ex-Omega Team and Spartan 013 is the assassin known as Zero."

"Zero is an actual assassin," Axton pointed out.

"I had gone AWOL/ONI hired me to play/I am still Zero," the Spartan said, adding a small smirk at the end when Axton and Salvador's eyebrows quirked up.

"You… talk in Haiku?" Axton wasn't sure how exactly to respond to that.

"Sometimes," Zero shrugged. Axton smiled. This was going to be a fun one.

086 looked around the group and crossed her arms over her chest. "I just had a chat with the Captain," she said. "Seems… the mission has changed a little. That stolen UNSC tech? That's our main objective. Any encounter with Eridian or Forerunner tech is to be strictly incidental."

"ONI's orders or the Captain's?" Axton asked. 086 smiled wryly at the question.

"Captain's," she replied. He nodded. So it was the Captain exercising use of his balls and spine against ONI in favor of his _real_ boss, the UNSC.

"What got stolen that's so important?" Axton asked.

"Rather, what the hell could Pandorans possibly get their hands on that's so important?" Salvador corrected the other NCO.

"Two suits of Mark V Mjolnir customized Spartan II style and their operators. Now, there's also a chance Hyperion managed to neutralize the operators and steal their armor. In that case, we are to destroy all Mjolnir-related data on Hyperion's servers as well as any replications they may have made. If they've managed to hack the neural implants on those two operators, we are to attempt capture, but we are authorized to neutralize if capture is impossible."

"Shit," Axton whistled. He was wrong. The Captain overrode ONI's orders because it was personal. He was more concerned about his brothers being subjected by Hyperion.

"Who operated/the armor we are to find?/Which of our brothers?" Zero asked, hands curled into fists. 086 shifted uncomfortably.

"Who do you think, K?"

Zero hung his head. "No…"

"Sad to say," 086 nodded, giving him a look that said more than any words could've. Axton was almost surprised. Then he realized they'd grown up together and the Spartans were probably a tighter-knit group of people than any he was likely to run into ever. A soft beep drew 086's attention to her TAC pad. "And there are three last-minute additions…" 086 frowned. "Captain's ready room, now."

"Are they ONI?" Salvador asked as they began to move from the room.

"Yes and no," 086 replied. "By the way, my name's Siobhan. You'll have to use it."

(V)

SLIPSTREAM SPACE  
_The _UNSC Infinity  
_Captain Lasky's Ready Room  
_12.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
"Thomas Lasky, you are _not_ about to tell me 'No, I can't do that.'"

Kelly's tone reminded Lasky of his mother, a thought which kind of frightened him, considering she was a few years his junior. He hesitated, closing his mouth. He was a captain. He outranked her. But he also knew what Spartan II's would be willing to do for people they cared about. It was the same anger and concern and fear in Kelly's eyes that he imagined would've been seen in John's, on the subject of Cortana, those years ago. Kelly had already lost John once—she didn't want to let it happen again. And Lasky could understand that. He sighed and looked at Roland's small holographic avatar. The aviator had his arms crossed over his chest and looked irritated, for an AI.

"_Sir, I can't say it would be wise—_"

"Roland change course for Pandora," Lasky gave in. He sighed and looked up at Kelly. "And raise Captain Rook. His people are running this op."

"_Yes, sir_…"

Lasky shook his head and sighed. "The shit I do for you Spartans," he said. Kelly beamed at him. She leaned down and pecked a kiss to his cheek.

"And we thank you so very much," Kelly added with a grin. Lasky rolled his eyes and waved his hand in a dismissive gesture that was only ok between friends. Kelly headed for the door. "Thanks again, Captain."

"Yeah, no problem," he said. "Inform me if you're taking anyone with you."

"Aye, sir," she said before ducking out of the room. Lasky glanced at Roland's projection.

"Gimme everything the ONI's got on that dirt ball, Roland."

"_Yes, sir. I'll need a minute…_"

"Also, I'd like you to go with Kelly," Lasky added in a lower voice. Roland's hologram seemed surprised. He uncrossed his arms and gestured emphatically.

"_That'll leave the _Infinity_dead in the water, sir!_" Roland protested.

"Leave a fragment behind to regulate the basic stuff. Humans can take care of the rest."

"_A battle with Hyperion or Atlas or Dahl?_"

"This is the UNSC's most advanced battle ship. I'm sure I can pull _something_ out of my ass in a battle against some corporate dickheads."

"_Sir, I'm not sure I understand that term…_"

"'Corporate dickheads'? You will. And besides, _The Queen's Bishop_ will be there. We won't be alone._"_

"_Alright, sir…_" Roland sighed. "_I have all the relevant data on your personal computer."_

"Awesome."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Just outside planetary orbit  
The _UNSC Infinity  
_The Bridge  
_20.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)

Lasky adjusted his collar just before Roland opened up the link.

"Captain Rook," Lasky began.

"_Captain Lasky_," Rook replied. "_Admiral Osman has said nothing of your involvement, here._"

"Yeah, I know… the _Infinity_'s on standby," Lasky shrugged. "But I have a soldier who would go AWOL if she couldn't be involved in a certain mission."

"_Which Spartan…_?"

"087," Lasky said. "And if Hyperion gets rude with you, the more the merrier, am I not right?"

"_Agreed_," Rook tilted his head in a micro nod anyone else was supposed to miss. It wasn't a gesture of agreement—rather a gesture of discomfort. Lasky had to get some shore time sooner rather than later—he was starting to read Spartans a little to well for a normal human. "_Are you asking permission?_"

"For Kelly to join the mission? No, I'm giving you fair warning. Like I said, she'll go AWOL before she's left out of this one. Fred and John's last known location was on Pandora and Kelly's not willing to loose John again and was _never_ willing to loose Fred."

"_Fair enough. I'll inform my team._"

"Great. _Infinity_ out."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Just outside planetary orbit  
The _UNSC Queen's Bishop  
_The Bridge  
_20.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
"What're you, a pirate, now?"

"Mal fucking Geffen!" Axton hissed, turning around quickly to come almost nose-to-nose with his best friend from ODST training. Mal smirked. Axton grinned. They hugged. Axton, upon parting from the hug with Mal, whistled as he looked up at Naomi, who didn't seem hardly amused. "Who's your girlfriend?" Axton asked Mal, one arm still slung around his friend's shoulders.

"Naomi-010," Mal said, smirking.

"High maintenance?"

"Chocolate and bullets usually gets me out of any serious trouble," Mal said, making Naomi actually smile. She stiffened up, though, hearing something Mal, Salvador and Axton had not.

"Trouble," Zero said in a low voice, pointedly changing the angle of the knife he was sharpening. They looked in the direction he was pointing in and both the brown-haired female and Siobhan were arguing with the two captains. Siobhan looked furious. She said something harsh, sharp and so quiet the troopers weren't even sure she'd said something, pointing an angry finger at Captain Rook's chest.

"This is not the last, _Charles_," she hissed and stepped away. The brown-haired Spartan woman gave an apologetic look to the human captain and flashed a glare to Rook, whose jaw tightened a little.

"I'm Kelly," the brown-haired female introduced herself. She smiled pleasantly. Like Naomi and Siobhan, she was dressed in Pandoran civvies. But rather than the ODST breastplate or Crimson Lance uniform under shirt, she wore a low-cut tank top instead. Axton's eyebrows lifted visibly and Mal tugged at his collar.

"My, my," he said. "This is gonna be a little more interesting than I thought."

"No, it's not," Siobhan scowled at him. "You and Naomi are here for Forerunner and Eridian artifacts. Sergeants York and Ruiz, Kelly, Zero and myself are here to retrieve UNSC equipment and personnel. _You_ will be looking at rocks and shooting bandits off your asses an' _we _will be wading into the middle of a war zone. It'll be exactly as _boring_ as you thought it would be."

"Our primary objective is to assist in retrieval," Naomi countered, brushing Mal and his rebuttal aside as she stepped up to face Siobhan.

"Bollocks," Siobhan replied sharply.

"Hey, uh, sorry to interrupt," a male voice said, introducing the Spartan IV team leader who'd dare approach the angry Irish Spartan woman and irritated Valkyrie. "I'm Chief Petty Officer Paul DeMarco… I'm leading the support units for you. We'll be in the rebel HQ, Sanctuary, if you need us."

"Thanks for that," Siobhan said dismissively. She glared up at Naomi. "Don't get in my way."

"Wouldn't dream of it," Naomi replied just as bitterly.

Siobhan went off with DeMarco to work on setting up an encrypted ECHO line from hers to his and between the only, while Naomi went off to go inspect the shuttle they'd be taking down, leaving Mal with the other four.

"So…" Salvador looked up at Kelly. "What're you here for?"

"Looking for two people very, very dear to me," she said. "My brothers, John and Fred were deployed here to help facilitate a peace between the Corporations and the locals while also trying to gather some data concerning the Eridians and Forerunners… ONI lost contact with them two months shy of a year ago. Then, two months later, someone hacked their server and posted a message to Admiral Osman that John and Fred were MIA. To a Spartan, that means dead, usually."

"But you didn't believe that," Mal concluded.

"They couldn't get close enough to launch a rescue mission until the _Queen's Bishop_ and the _Infinity_ finished their last ops," Kelly shrugged. "I kinda elbowed my way onto the mission…"

"For you this is totally personal," Axton said. "Spartans do that?"

"And when they do, it gets messy for anyone in their way," Kelly said, smiling sweetly. "I'm talkin' UNSC personnel five ranks higher than them getting fired on the spot messy. Or tactical nuke messy."

"Shit, Hyperion's in for hell," Salvador laughed. He looked up at Kelly. "I think we'll be best friends," he said with a broad grin. She smiled back, almost as broadly.

"As long as you help me find mine, sure."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Southern Shelf Railway  
Hyperion Mag-Lev Train  
_20.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Axton was glad for the Spartans. Especially Zero, with his stolen Covvie gear. The man dropped a hologram, hitting the active camo at the same time, and snuck around behind his enemies while they were focused on the sword-twirling, menacingly approaching hologram.

Heads rolled.

Kelly smashed her way through the Hyperion bots, her PSG sparking erratically as the impact and their bullets shredded away at it. Finally, it went down and Axton chucked the experimental auto-turret device between her and the next bot. The fifty-caliber machine gun digistructed out of the small flat box and shredded through the next few bots, digistructed armor-piercing bullets ripping apart the steel.

"_Kelly, your shields!_" Roland warned as she sprang past the turret. A robot swung down its mechanical arm, the bladed weapon bolted into its "fist" slashing into her arm as she brought it up to defend herself. Kelly gritted her teeth in pain as the blade halted on her ceramic plated bone. She kicked the robot hard enough to smash it on the doorway, but it opened fire as it fell.

Kelly expected this to be it—for it to be the end… But another robot was hovering between her and the Hyperion bot. A shirtless, muscular man screamed something about meat bicycles and cleaved the Hyperion bot's arm from its body.

"You ok, lady?" a voice asked from the door between train cars. A teenager was standing there, spattered in blood and oil.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Kelly said.

"_Are not,_" Roland grumbled. "_You've got a cut to the bone in your left arm…_"

"Good thing I'm right handed," Kelly muttered back to the AI. The shirtless muscular man was at her side now, shoulder and back presented to her, as opposed to his face. He cut into Hyperion personnel and bots alike with his buzz-saw axe and split them open with his shot gun.

Salvador seemed to be having the time of his life, laughing his ass off as he sheered one of the personnel's throat open with a bullet from the left of the man. He took another out, making him stumble back out of the open doorway. The rest of them were pretty much low on ammo, since most of their gear was packed away in the luggage car.

Axton was on red alert, moving automatically with his tomahawk and rifle. He was out of ammo, so he used the rifle butt, smashing it into a robot and holding it down long enough for the blue-haired woman and teenage girl to take it out.

Naomi and Mal worked back-to-back, defending each other tooth and nail. She traded him a clip of ammunition for his larger combat knife. With the two knives, she worked quicker, slashing into anything that approached.

Siobhan bobbed up at Kelly's side, slapping a quick-seal med patch onto the wound on Kelly's arm. She ducked off, using the crossbow and hatchets she'd brought along to great effect. Men and robots dropped and she plucked the arrows back up, shooting them off again.

"Hey!" the teenager dove forward, catching a bladed weapon against her left arm. A loud clang sounded, signifying the arm was prosthetic. Axton looked over at her, thankful she'd just saved his head from parting ways with his shoulders.

"Thanks, kid," he said. "Damn blind spot."

"I got you," the girl smiled and shot the robot down. The troops stopped coming and they regrouped in the middle of the car, briefly.

"I'm Gaige," the girl with the robot arm said. "My robot's name is Death Trap."

"I'm Maya," the blue-haired woman said. "And my psycho's name is Krieg."

"The krieg in mein kopf spills out, lashing at and drowning those haters of justice," Krieg snarled, gesturing around the train car.

"He's nuts," Maya said apologetically. "Won't leave me for anything."

"Is he safe?" Salvador asked, wary. "I know what Psychos do, _chica_. Do you?"

"Yeah," she said. "Yes, he's safe. Saved me from a bunch of tunnel rats."

"Lucky you," Salvador was impressed. "One hell of a way to go… _monstruos caníbales._"

"Why's Hyperion attacking us?" Mal asked. "We're just riding a bloody train."

"We're Vault Hunters," Axton shrugged. "If you cared to read all the files, you'd know."

"Oh, don't let this be about how your mission is fucking nobler," Mal hissed.

"I didn't say it was," Axton fired back. "Guilty, much?"

"Hey," Kelly interrupted. She looked back at Gaige and Maya. "How long have you two had boots on ground here?"

"Two days," Maya said.

"A few hours," Gaige shrugged. Kelly frowned. "Why? You looking for someone?"

"My brothers," Kelly said. "They went missing here about a year ago."

"They're probably dead," Maya said, wincing. "Sorry."

"They're definitely not dead," Kelly said. "They're both too stubborn for it."

"Do you have a picture?" Maya asked, apologetic.

Kelly held out a sketch. "This is them," she said. "John and Fred. John's the taller one."

"He's handsome," Maya said. Kelly shrugged.

"You sure they're alive?" Gaige asked, scrutinizing the photograph. "I mean, sure they look like tough sons of bitches, but are you _sure…_?"

"Positive," Kelly said. "They won't die until they're good and ready."

"Krieg? You know either of these guys?" Maya showed him the picture. He snarled and gripped his head. Axton's hand alighted on his tomahawk. Salvador curled his fingers around his knife. Everyone else grabbed their sidearms.

"Demons! Demons! Makes my brain hurt with their cursed, empty eyes…" Krieg growled.

"I'd say that's a 'no'," Gaige said.

"There's one last car," Siobhan interrupted. "Clearly these lasses don't know anything about John an' Fred."

"Ax, why don't you take point?" Mal lifted his pistol from its holster. Axton sighed and stepped past him, drawing his tomahawk. He pushed open the door and stepped forward, raising his arm to hack into the skull of the man in the swivel chair. The chair turned slowly.

"_Let's just make one thing perfectly clear…_" the man was actually a mannequin, painted to look like Handsome Jack. In his lap was a bomb. On the floor around him were bombs. They had seconds and nowhere to run. "_Y'all may think you're the heroes of this story, but you're not. Welcome to Pandora, kiddos!_"

The car exploded.


	2. Chapter 2

Uh, this is mostly gonna be following along the lines of Borderlands 2, but with some other people. IDK if I'll stick a random Freelancer in there, since I'm making Axton out to be Agent York... -_o ... What do y'all think?

Anyways, this is just a here-to-there kind of thing. Furthering the plot in nudges... And tossing in a little thickening agent! :) I'll probably not be able to add more for another couple of weeks, but who knows? Surprises, right? Reviews might motivate me, too. :)

* * *

CHAPTER TWO

PANDORA  
_Southern Shelf_  
_Wreckage of the Hyperion Mag-Lev Railway_  
20.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Kelly wasn't sure how long they'd been lying in the snow, but she could still feel all her extremities, so it probably wasn't long.

"Great, another dead vault hunter…" a robotic voice chirped sadly. "Handsome Jack sure has been busy…"

Kelly kicked when she felt the mechanical claws close around her ankle.

"Fucking Claptrap!" Salvador cursed loudly, hitting the robot with a snowball. He moved to Siobhan, who was already getting up.

"Shite…" the dark-haired female grunted, gripping her hip. A confetti-blast of shrapnel dusted her hip, the blood freezing on the thigh pieces of her Crimson Lance armor as it ran down.

Axton pulled Gaige out of the snow. She grabbed his arm with her metal hand and he hissed sharply. "Cold!" he winced.

"Sorry," Gaige said with a giggle. Maya and Naomi were up and Mal was limping towards the group, likely with a twisted ankle or knee, since nothing seemed seriously wrong, from what Kelly could tell as she started to get up.

Krieg shook himself like a dog as he approached Kelly. She took the offered hand and stood, feeling nothing but pain shooting up her back. Nothing was broken, but it hurt.

"Roland, diagnostics?" Kelly hissed as she limped over to Siobhan and Salvador.

"_Three cracked vertebrae and five cracked ribs. Minimal burns and other damage,_" the AI reported. "_You should get to a doctor._"

"Where's the closest doctor?" Kelly asked Salvador.

"Only good doctor on Pandora is Zed," Salvador shrugged. He looked at the Claptrap. "Where is he?"

"Dr. Zed is currently residing in Sanctuary, the last bastion of Freedom from the Oppression of Hyperion," the Claptrap tittered. "I do, however, have some of his patented Dr. Zed Health Hypos at my place!"

"Excellente!" Salvador said. He looked around and did a head count. "Where's Zero?

"Here…" Zero sounded pained as he limped towards the group. He had a piece of metal protruding from his side and another from his thigh.

"Will you make it?" Mal asked. Zero cocked his head to the side and a smiley face icon appeared on his visor.

"Of course," Zero replied.

They moved out, Zero allowing Kelly to help him along. The Claptrap's place was little more than a cavern shored up with some scrap metal, book cases and blocks of ice. He had a furnace made out of a broken loader's torso up against one wall with a stove pipe going straight up to a hole in the ceiling. The Claptrap wheeled over to a cabinet, which he promptly opened. He handed Salvador a box with a red tape plus on it. Salvador sat Zero down on a busted half-couch and grabbed the piece of metal.

"Ready for some Pandoran medicine, _mano_?" he asked. Zero shrugged, gripping the couch arm with his right hand, balling the left into a fist by his thigh. Salvador planted his palm on Zero's knee and pulled, the jagged spikes of metal tearing through his flesh and drawing a snarl of pain from him. Salvador pulled a vial out of the med kit and pulled the plastic cap off the needle. He stabbed Zero higher up on his thigh, squeezing the plunger until all of the crimson fluid had drained into the assassin. Zero exhaled sharply as the wound started to heal.

"You next," Axton said when Siobhan turned to him.

"Can it fix Axton's eye?" Gaige asked. Salvador shook his head.

"Nope," Salvador said. "That's an old one. Siobhan?" he pulled the second needle from the box as Zero stood up and staggered over to share the crate with Naomi. He felt uncomfortable using the Spartan's name, feeling like he should call her 'ma'am' or 'Spartan' rather than 'Siobhan.' It just felt out of place… Siobhan limped over and sat down. Salvador realized this was going to be harder than he thought. "Crap," he said. "I need to pull the shrapnel, but there's no tongy-things…"

"Forceps?" Axton was amused. Salvador shrugged.

"I hold the key," Krieg said suddenly. They all looked at him. He drew a thin-bladed knife and approached the furnace. He stuck the knife into the fire, heating it to the point of frying anything but metal on the blade. It cooled as he moved across the room to Siobhan. She undid her thigh-armor and her belt, pushing her pants down just far enough to let him get a good look at the wound. Salvador held her shirt up for her while she gripped at the couch, teeth clenched around her own knife grip. Krieg glanced at her then stuck the knife into the first of the small wounds, plying out the scrap of metal.

(V)

They had watch in shifts that night.

Axton tossed a glance at Salvador as he moved for the door. He'd grown to like the marine and he knew they'd all be dead in a few days if they didn't have him along with them. Gaige and Maya had just finished their watch, having volunteered for the ever-tedious second shift of watch. Axton still hated third shift most, though. He squatted by the cavern entrance, Maya's loaner Maliwan SMG in his lap. It fired bullets plated with an electro-static jacket, she said when she'd lent it to him. His watch partner followed him out a few seconds later. Mal patted down his jacket and retrieved a pack of cigarettes. He patted his pockets again.

"Damn," he cursed. "You got a light?"

"Yeah," Axton drew a lighter out of his pocket. He looked down at it, feeling a pang of sadness as he stared at the lighter. _Charlie…_ he held back his sigh and flicked open the cover, jamming his thumb down on the starter. Flames sparked to life and he held his hand out. Mal leaned in, cupping his hand around to keep the light wind from blowing it out as he lit up his cigarette.

"Can't smoke on the ship," Mal said. "Makes lots of blokes bitchy."

"Probably why I never stuck to the habit," Axton shrugged. "So… How's it to work for ONI?"

"You tell me," Mal shrugged back. He tapped the corner of his left eye as he exhaled a long stream of smoke. "Or did you loose that in the war but somehow keep your head?"

"They had me, V and Lieutenant Baker and this Lieutenant Junior Grade… Uh, Gallagher, I think her name was," Axton took a pause to accept and light up a cigarette from Mal. "We infiltrated this black ops project and scrubbed a few people trying to steal info," Axton said, letting out a stream of smoke. He glanced at Mal.

"How is V?" Mal asked, flicking ashes into the snow.

"Got blown up by one of the other agents who went rogue," Axton admitted sadly. "Only one of those agents I know is still alive, asides from me, is this kid named David. He was barely out of basic when he got pulled in. He sucked, compared to the rest of us, but he had these moments where he could just blow you away. I liked him a lot."

"Sounds like," Mal agreed.

"So, what's it been like for you?"

"Well, I helped start a civil war that got scrubbed easy, ended up causing some trouble with the hinge-heads that came back to bite the UNSC in the ass," Mal shrugged. "May or may not be the damn reason we're here."

"How's that?"

"Rumor has it Fred and John were here looking for Dr. Halsey," Mal said. "Bein' the Queenpin's mate lets ya get at things no one else does."

"I'll bet. But how'd that come about?"

"Word was that Hyperion intercepted and destroyed a ship run by one of those Storm Covenant fellas. And Jul 'Mdama's been dark since that word started goin' round. He's the bloke grabbed Dr. H."

"Shit, just what we need," Axton exhaled hard, the wisps of breath and smoke looking like a dragon's breath. "Fucking hinge-heads."

"Those two gals seemed to be doin' just fine," Mal shrugged. "Wonder what Pandoran gear'll do to one of them."

"Hopefully splatter the bastards," Axton sighed, a stream of smoke rushing from his mouth with the sigh.

"Axton?"

Axton and Mal glanced over, seeing Gaige moving up towards them.

"Yeah, kid?" Axton flicked the ashes of his cigarette off into the snow then decided to drop it, earning a huff from Mal for wasting the better half of one of his cigarettes. Gaige sat down next to Axton, huddling up against his side. He almost recoiled, but he enjoyed her warmth. He hadn't dressed for a Pandoran winter.

"Can't sleep in there," she said, sounding tiny and sad. "It smells like blood and oil… and all those broken Claptraps…"

Axton dropped his hand on her shoulder, pulling her a little closer. She dropped her head onto his shoulder and appreciated the arm around her. Mal snorted and flicked his cigarette butt out into the snow.

"Think we're gonna die here?" he asked Axton. Axton shrugged.

"I got faith in that Salvador guy and now that the Spartans know what we're up against, I don't see them fucking up again," Axton shrugged.

"Maya was talking about another siren we can go find," Gaige said. "Said she heard this siren lady's super powerful… I'll bet she can help us."

"Yeah, sure…" Axton said. "We can talk it over with Siobhan tomorrow."

"Oh no!"

At the yell, the two ODST's were on their feet.

"Hold the entrance with that robot of yours," Axton told Gaige as he and Mal sprinted into the cavern, weapons raised. A huge creature, not looking unlike a plus-sized four-armed Brute, was hanging from the stove pipe, holding the claptrap. It reached into the robot's face plate, tearing out its eye. Knives and bullets flew at the creature, a few of them actually sinking into the creature's flesh.

Zero jumped, moving almost too fast for the human eye to track. But the creature swung around at the last second, swatting the ex-Spartan wetwork asset away as it climbed up the pipe. The assassin's sword protruded from the creature's back as it scrambled away, leaving Claptrap without its eye.

"My… eye…" Claptrap croaked, pushing itself up with a little help from Maya. "You guys… can you find that bullymong and get my eye back? I'll take you to Sanctuary if you do…"

"That thing's called a 'Bullymong'?" Mal raised an eyebrow. "I think I'm starting to get nostalgic about being shot at by Covvies already…"

"I dunno," Kelly shrugged. "It looks like it might be fun."

"How are we gonna find it?" Maya asked. "It's gone and we didn't exactly pin it with a tracker."

"Knives, bullets and sword/The bullymong is wounded now/We can track the blood," Zero said. He glanced up the expanse between himself and the hole in the ceiling. He stepped back a little and ran full-tilt at the wall. He jumped, darting up the wall, finding hand and foot holds on the ice as he moved. "I'll track it and you can track me."

(V)

They tied the Claptrap across Krieg's back before setting off after Zero and the bullymong. They encountered a few, which Kelly and Naomi dispatched quickly with a few punches and kicks. Salvador had his rifle slung across his shoulders, hands resting on the barrel and buttstock.

"I've never been this far north before," he told Axton. "I've never seen a bullymong up close."

"They look kinda like Brutes with four arms," Axton said. "And I'm damn glad they're not half as intelligent as Brutes."

"Si," Salvador agreed. "That would be bad."

"Oh yeah."

Siobhan paused, holding up her hand in the 'halt' gesture, a closed fist. She dropped down into a crouch, pointing at Kelly and Maya and gesturing out one way. Kelly hefted her salvaged sniper rifle and lead Maya along the narrow shelf of ice and stone, carefully picking her way. Siobhan pointed at Axton and Naomi and sent them in the opposite direction. She waved Krieg closer.

"I'll tell you when to run in, yeah?" she said. He nodded and growled once, showing he understood. They sat still for a moment. Suddenly, Zero backflipped into view, out of a crevice on the cliff they were facing, landing in a low crouch on the wide icy expanse. A totaled car flew through the gap in the ice, nearly crushing him. He jumped to the side, rolling at the last second and spun, throwing two kunai-style knives into the crevice.

The massive bullymong, now with Claptrap's eye tied around its neck, crashed through the ice, slamming a boulder in Zero's direction. Zero somersaulted to the side, sending a quartet of shuriken in the creature's direction.

"Go, Krieg," Siobhan said, taking Claptrap from him. He roared and ran full-tilt for the bullymong, raising his buzz-saw axe.

"GET OVER HERE AND SMELL MY MEAT!" Krieg shouted, pausing beside Zero. The bullymong charged at him, a massive four-armed gorilla. Everyone with a rifle opened fire and Krieg charged up to meet the bullymong, slamming his buzz-saw axe down into its skull, splitting the bone and painting himself with brains and blood as the buzz-saw ground away.

The bullymong collapsed, dead, and Krieg retrieved Claptrap's eye, handing it off to Zero as he stalked over to the robot, making to pick it up. The Claptrap hopped up and wheeled away, leaving the psycho to chase after it. The group followed the little robot up to a mechanical docking station.

"There's a man named Sir Hammerlock," the robot explained. "He lives in Liar's Berg, right on the other side of this barge. As much as I'm sure the rest of you would like to jam your fists into my skull, I'd rather Sir Hammerlock took care of my eye problem."

"I've worked on much more complex equipment than you," Kelly told Claptrap. "So have Naomi and Siobhan and Zero… And Gaige. We could fix your eye."

"Nope! Sir Hammerlock'll take care of it! And besides, we still need to go that way to get to Sanctuary," Claptrap chirped. He wheeled up to the panel. "Hyperion tech! Child's play," he snorted and attempted to access the panel. The panel scanned him and immediately gates slammed down shut over the doorway. All of the people looked at Claptrap in annoyance. "Well, sorry about that, my wonderful minions! I hear freezing to death is a pleasant way to go."

"Can I shoot him?" Salvador grunted.

"Not just yet," Siobhan frowned.

"_Kelly, pull me_," Roland said. When they were back together, Kelly pulled Roland's chip out of the ECHO device and held it up. The small gold hologram appeared from the projector. _"I can take care of the Hyperion problem, but here's the thing… I can only be in there for a few seconds before they get a read on my software. Kelly, give me exactly five seconds. I'll be able to hold their AI off that long for sure._"

"Ok. Ready?"

"_As ever_," Roland's hologram vanished and Kelly stuck his chip into a small port on the side of the panel. The red "x" icon vanished and Kelly pulled his chip out, having counted to five. The barring mechanisms withdrew and the door was left open.

Siobhan, Mal and Naomi gave Kelly a quizzical look as she reinserted Roland's chip into her ECHO device. Kelly shrugged. "Tom's an old friend," Kelly said. "He worries."

"Good thing," Mal said, moving into the barge after Salvador. The robot wheeled in after them and felt around for the panel once everyone was aboard and Gaige sounded off about it.

"_Kelly?"_

"Yeah, Roland?"

"_That Angel… I don't trust her. I couldn't get a lock, but she's not what she seems._"

"I read you, loud and clear…"

(V)

PANDORA  
_Hyperion Space Station  
Planetary Orbit_  
20.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Angel pulled back physically, stunned. She shook her head, surprised. She'd never been deflected with that kind of force before. She'd never hit a wall like that. She'd been trying to help the Vault Hunters, but suddenly that AI had swatted her with full force, knocking her away.

"What?" Jack frowned. "What is it?"

"These Vault Hunters… they have a powerful AI with them. I couldn't get enough of a read on it…" Angel said. "It kept me out."

"You mean they put an AI in the system that you can't beat?" Jack was angry. Angel nodded, biting her lip. "Who's got the AI? Could you see?"

"I can't… I don't know," Angel said. "I can't tell. I can't even say where this AI came from."

"You have no idea what this AI is or where it came from…" Jack was beyond angry at this point. He drummed his fingers on the railing.

"What is it?" she knew his quirks by now. He was really pissed and he had an idea.

"I think I know where it came from, at least."

* * *

So... Roland the AI vs. Angel, huh? And Jack, he's aware of the UNSC's direct involvement now... Uh oh!

Up next: Liar's Berg, Bullymongs, Pirate-Bandits and The Restoration of Claptrap's Cyclopic vision! Oh, and Kelly discovers just how much she hates Rakk. And Axton makes RvB jokes.

Remember: Reviews fund the taskforce! If you don't review, they'll have to go home and leave John and Fred to rot on Pandora-with the rest of the Pandorans!


	3. Chapter 3

Yay! Reviews feed Krieg because they are made of meat.

Now some of y'all have guessed that Krieg is Fred. Well, could be... The answers are out there, but I'm not saying where, exactly. Go find the answer on your own. 'S not that hard. Seriously. It's not. Oh, and on the subject of Krieg: He cannot and will not be transforming into a badass Psycho at any point in this story. It's physically impossible and I just can't write that.

So, yeah. I'm gonna try and update this more often, since I'm hitting less of a mental block with it than with my other story. Also, I might try to put up another yaoi fluff piece (I don't know why, but John-117xFred-104. It's a thing.)

Anywho, I'm not 2K, Roosterteeth or 343, so I don't own anyone, y'know, except Siobhan and Rook and the Queen's Bishop. And the idea of Zero actually being an ex-Spartan ONI wetwork asset and Salvador being a UNMC Marine... And Axton being York. I own those ideas.

Oh, yeah, and I totally forgot to put the chapter header on the last chapter. The last one was Chapter 2. This is Chapter 3. My bad, guys. :)

Without much more ado... Ta-dah!

**EDIT** I TOTALLY forgot about Paul DeMarco. Yes, I know his character was killed off in one of the comics… But I really liked him and he seemed like one of the best Spartan IV's, so… I had to add him. Uh… yeah.

* * *

CHAPTER 3

_Handsome Jack here!_

_A big warm greeting to the scum of Pandora! There's a group of ten Vault Hunters running around. I'm offering a reward of $1,000,000 per head of these eleven Vault Hunters to the one who brings 'em in-dead or alive! These Vault Hunters are as follows:_

_1) Maya, the Siren. Blue hair, roughly five and a half feet tall with blue markings on her left arm._

_2) Gaige Stark, the "Mechromancer"-what the hell is that? Whatever, it's stupid.-five-foot-nothing teenage girl with a mechanical left arm and red hair._

_3) Salvador Ruiz, the Gunzerker of the Arid Hills. Five-four with a mohawk and beard, tattoos of bullets around both arms._

_4) Axton York, fugitive of the UNSC and Dahl for war crimes and being AWOL from Project STATESIDE, as well as theft of classified information from Project_

_5) STATESIDE. Five-nine, brown hair, eye patch on his left eye._

_6) Zer0, the assassin. AWOL ONI wetwork asset and known assassin. Six-seven, wears black leather and a black helmet with a red "0" stitched on his shirt._

_7) Unknown male Vault Hunter. Six-one, brown hair, blue eyes. Corporate spy._

_8) Unknown female Dahl Valkyrie. Six-ten, blonde hair, blue eyes. Wanted for desertion from Dahl Valkyrie Corps._

_9) Unknown female Crimson Lance Omega Assassin. Six-eight, black hair, green eyes, Irish. Wanted for desertion from the Crimson Lance._

_10) Unknown female Vault Hunter. Six-seven, brown hair, blue eyes. Wanted data thief-in possession of high-powered AI stolen from the UNSC._

_11) Krieg, a Psycho. Six-five, green eyes, shaved head, branded with the number "033112" on left pectoral. Hyperion test subject, therefore "stolen" Hyperion property._

_Thanks, you filthy scum for listening. Remember, $1,000,000!_

PANDORA  
_Southern Shelf  
Liar's Berg  
_21.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Kelly missed her Mjolnir.

It would be exactly 72.3 degrees Fahrenheit in her armor, rather than the negative whatever it was in the snow outside in this "Liar's Berg" shithole. It was four little igloo-style huts made of ice chunks frozen together with a bullet vending machine in front of one of the buildings. She did, however, see a rather large graveyard for such a tiny town-with maybe twenty graves in it, all looking rather new.

Kelly squatted down beside Zero, who was adjusting his sniper sights. He was the best sniper in the bunch and Kelly was to be his spotter. She couldn't tell how he was feeling. Everything about him was controlled to a degree she'd never seen, including among the rest of her Spartan brothers and sisters. She knew he was an ex-Spartan, but she couldn't tell who he was.

Zero propped his rifle on a small pile of snow, hunkering down in the snow. She noticed the way he dug his toes into the snow and shifted his hips against the snow and realized who he was. Only one of her classmates dug his boots in like that and did that little butt-wiggle.

"Kuro?" she asked quietly, leaning forward to see if he'd depolarize his visor or something. Instead, she got a holographic smiley face. Kelly smiled back. "Good to see you."

"Likewise," Zero said, lowering his helmeted cheek to stock, peering down the sights. Kelly tossed a glance back at the group readying for incursion. Maya and Gaige had outfitted their new friends as best they could and Krieg had given up his four guns rather easily, favoring the axe and his battered kitchen knife, which he claimed had slain a Jaberwocky in the battles of Wonderland, whatever that meant.

"So they really call it Zero-Dark-Thirty?" Gaige raised an eyebrow.

"Thirty minutes after midnight," Axton replied. "Yes, that's a thing."

"Wow. It sounds too cool to be what it is."

"Sometimes that happens," Axton smiled, amused. He was beginning to like Gaige. He pulled back the slide on the rifle he'd traded the SMG for. He preferred a nice shot gun to an assault rifle, but Salvador had called dibs on it first and he was stuck with Krieg's antique ME19B-D Dahl 6.5 mm gas-operated, air-cooled semi-auto assault rifle with a three-round burst fire setting. It looked like an antique M16 assault rifle, but with a slightly thicker stock and barrel and a different sight. The little green cross-haired sight had a tiny cartoon skull icon in the top right corner. He rested his thumb against the safety and looked over at Siobhan.

"Axton you're Bravo leader. Naomi, Gaige, Kreig and you will move through the front gate. Salvador, you're with me, Maya and Mal. We're heading down that cliff right onto them," Siobhan told them. "Zero, keep them quiet for us."

"Yes, ma'am," Zero drawled.

It worked seamlessly. Claptrap opened the gate and locked up in his box form and the soldiers assaulted into the town. They cleared it in a matter of seconds, the disorganized bandits dying quickly under the precision fire of the professional soldiers. Salvador spit on one of the corpses.

"After fighting Elites and Brutes, this is a piece of cake!" he snorted. "I forgot how stupid Bandits are."

"Hammerlock is this way!" Claptrap chirped, wheeling into a snow drift. Salvador and Mal righted him and the Australian raised an eyebrow.

"Where's Hammerlock?"

"Greetings, Vault Hunters! I'm Sir Hammerlock. I reside in the domicile on the small rise, just here... A moment while I shut down the electrical fence," the voice greeting then over their ECHO headsets was eloquent, British and male. Naomi took the lead towards the fence. "Whoa, steady there, Vault Hunter. Stand back while I shut down the electrical fence."

Naomi hovered a good ten feet away from the gate, the others crowding around.

"I told you me and Hammerlock were pals! Like two peas in a pod! Or two cannibal midgets in a fat guy's rib cage!" Claptrap cheered. He wheeled right up to and bumped into the electric fence. The robot was stunned, shocked and fell to the snow, twitching.

"Apologies, Vault Hunters... You see, when I hear Claptrap speak, I can quite literally feel my braincells committing suicide," Hammerlock informed them over the ECHO. "There. I've shut down the electrical fence. I'll be out in a jiffy!"

"'Jiffy'?" Gaige pulled a face. Axton chuckled.

The door of the house swung open and out strolled an older man with an artificial leg and arm. He had a large, thick mustache and jogged out to meet them, opening up the gate. "Ah, hello there, all of you! I should like to warn you, Handsome Jack's put it out on the ECHO that he's willing to pay one million dollars per head to anyone who can bring you in," Hammerlock said. "Come in, will you? It'll be rather tight quarters, but it's warm."

"Claptrap's eye?" Zero offered the eye to Hammerlock.

"Ah, yes..." Hammerlock frowned. He knelt with a huff next to the little box of a robot and waved his hand. "Yes, yes, just go on in and make yourselves at home. There's a box of tea on the counter and hot water in the pot. Biscuits in the bin by the tea. And brandy in the cupboard above the bin."

The Vault Hunters headed into Hammerlock's cabin and settled around his study-slash-kitchen area. Only Mal and Maya partook in the tea-except for the Spartans, everyone else partook in the cookies. Salvador and Axton took some of the brandy. Hammerlock walked in a few minutes later, the claptrap wheeling in after him.

"What did you all do to piss Jack off so much?" Hammerlock crossed his arms over his chest, leaning against the counter.

"We didn't die," Maya said. "He tried to blow us up."

"Yes... Well, you don't look like you're all normal people, so it's hardly a surprise," Hammerlock snorted. "You, for one, young lady, appear to be a Siren. The lovely woman with the brown hair and the lovely women with the armor also appear to be Spartans—Augmented super soldiers with superhuman strength and speed," he told Maya, in response to her perplexed expression. Maya looked at them.

"Are you, really?" she blinked.

"Yeah," Kelly said. She pulled out her picture. "Do you know these guys? Have you seen them before?"

"Yes," Hammerlock said. He took off his glasses and cleaned the one remaining lens. "They worked with Roland for a time," he told her. "Lovely lads. Handsome, tough as nails, both of them. John went MIA and Bloodwing confirmed Frederic as KIA."

Kelly looked down at the picture, covering her mouth with a hand. She swallowed hard and Salvador pushed his brandy to her. She gave him a look and tucked the picture back in her pocket. "Is it possible John's alive and this Bloodwing was mistaken?"

"Oh, it's more than certain John is alive," Hammerlock said. "There have been rumors from passers-by of destroyed towns. Those that saw the destruction from great enough of a distance claimed a single man performed the acts of war that massacred everyone in those towns and leveled the structures. A tall man in armor—Hyperion yellow, but the only man with the strength to do these things, that I know of, would be John."

"So he's working for Hyperion?" Naomi frowned.

"Decidedly not. Jack likely has some kind of device controlling him," Hammerlock said. "As for Bloodwing being mistaken of Frederic's death... Well, it's entirely possible. She was being shot at and we were unable to recover a body. Best guess for what Jack might've done to him? Slag experimentation or a similar fate to John—a mind-control device and armor. Either way, he'll likely need to be put down. I doubt there's much actually left of him."

Kelly looked up, anger flashing in her eyes. "The hell with that. If he can be recovered, he will be. Both of them," she said.

"Well, then Sanctuary appears to be your best bet," Hammerlock said. "The only way there is across the bay with Claptrap's ferry and up through Three Horns. Between us now and there, there's bandits and bullymongs and pirates in the way."

"Bandits? Easy," Salvador snorted. "We kill Covvies. Pandoran assholes are easier than hookers."

"Yes, of course," Hammerlock chuckled. Zero pulled back the charging handle on his freshly cleaned and reassembled Orion MS13-AC3 semi-automatic sniper rifle, sounding off a loud metallic click. Hammerlock laughed. "I'll take that as a request for directions and a demand that the silly old man stop cautioning you."

"Indeed," Zero replied. Hammerlock leaned over the table, reaching into the mess of papers. He pulled out a paper map and spread it out, taking out a green highlighter from his left breast pocket. He drew a line from one small point to another and took out a smaller sheet of paper which held a zoomed-in version of the area, highlighting the smaller map as well.

"Now here—" he drew an 'x' on the smaller map, "is the ship that belongs to Captain Flynt. He's a pyromaniac and has a tough shield."

"High velocity, weighted-tip, armor-piercing fifty-caliber sniper rifle ammunition," Zero said, tapping his sniper's magazine. "Takes the head and shoulders off an Elite in one round—shields or no."

"Impressive," Hammerlock said.

"I'm ex-Spartan," Zero said, picking up the maps. He handed them to Siobhan, who was already standing.

"Thank you, sir," Siobhan said.

"I'll ECHO you later," Hammerlock said. "Goodbye, Vault Hunters. Happy hunting!"

(V)

PANDORA  
_Southern Shelf  
Flynt's Dragonship  
_21.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Flynt's head was little more than a spattering of brain tissue, teeth and skull. Zero shouldered his sniper and drew his sword, bisecting a flaming Psycho charging at him. Krieg stuck his kitchen knife in a bandit's eye and retrieved his buzz-saw axe as he strode after Zero. Kelly hooked her SMG back onto her belt and took up position by the door as Claptrap opened the broad door.

"That was easy," Salvador grumbled.

"It's better easy," Gaige said. "We get to save our ammo for the real baddos."

"No, it's better harder," Axton said. "That way you get to have some fun with it and train up while you're at it. Give me one good Elite over a twenty Grunts any day."

"Agreed," Naomi said.

(V)

PANDORA  
_Sanctuary  
Crimson Raiders' HQ  
_21.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
DeMarco met them at the gate. He led them to Sanctuary's HQ. "I lost one of my men with Roland," he told them. "Thorne. He was my right hand man..."

"You're not the only one who lost people on this planet," Kelly told him. "Thorne's alright."

"Yeah, of course he is... Nearly handled an Elite without full use of his armor," DeMarco grinned. Then his expression sank. "Of course, the Master Chief and Lieutenant 104 are fine, too. You guys are miles better than we could ever be."

"Oh, I don't know about that," Kelly said with a shrug. "I've fought alongside you guys… You're not half bad."

"Well, sure, but we're not Spartan II's," DeMarco said, glancing at the dirt.

"Where's the rest of your team?" Siobhan asked as they came to the entrance of HQ.

"Hoya and Madsen are on watch and Grant's helping the town medic," DeMarco said. Zero glanced around.

"Raiders seem trusting/Of the very new arrivals/Why so comfortable?"

"We're Spartans," DeMarco said. "It's kinda a hard thing to fake. And Captain Rook contacted Roland ahead of time, let him know we were coming. The Crimson Raiders can't get enough allies—If you didn't know, Hyperion is freaking massive with bottomless pockets. They can afford enough troops to cause a problem for a full-sized invasion force. They've got much better weaponry than the Raiders. And even though both sides are fighting multiple enemies, since Hyperion's got more man power and battle droids and whatever, they aren't stretched nearly as thin as the Raiders are. The Raiders have just over a thousand men in uniform. They've got some support from settlements, but those guys aren't soldiers. It's pretty crappy shape these guys are in."

Siobhan sent Mal, Maya, Gaige, Naomi, Axton and Salvador to go get some rest and unwind. Zero refused to leave her side and Kelly was more interested in what the HQ had to offer. Krieg slunk off after Maya and Gaige, seemingly hesitating about leaving Kelly.

DeMarco brought them into an office with a few computers on the wall and a holo table in the middle of the room. Almost all the tech seemed out-dated , but clearly that was all there was.

"This is it… Home sweet home for however long we're here," DeMarco said, shrugging. Siobhan frowned, glancing around the room.

"It's better than I expected," she said. "I'll be honest… Part of me expected antique re-fitted freight-truck radios and 23rd century computers…"

"It's not bad for scavenged tech," DeMarco scratched at the back of his head. "But it does make me miss the _Infinity_."

"How long would it take to get an element down here?"

"Depends on the size and whether or not Jack starts shooting at them," DeMarco replied. "We could probably get a platoon or two down before he starts shooting."

"No good. You need more bodies than that," Siobhan said.

"_We_ need more bodies than that," Kelly corrected. They both looked at her. "Look, Jack made it personal when he took John and Fred down. Made it even more personal when he tried to blow us up. This is _our_ operation. And since we're UNSC, that means it involves any UNSC forces in the immediate space. Tell me I'm wrong."

"You're right," DeMarco said.

"And what kind of soldiers would we be if we didn't do everything we could for all the refugees stranded in the middle of this?" Kelly added. Siobhan crossed her arms over her chest.

"Other than depressin' news about our lack of resources in-atmo, what do you have for us?"

"Not much," DeMarco said. "The _Queen's_ AI, Dante, sent me a few flash-docs talking about a few renegades from Project Stateside. Supposedly, a few of them were almost caught here, but disappeared. They'd be doing merc work, or they'd be dead."

"Project Stateside? Like what Axton was involved in?" Zero cocked his head to the side. "They'd still have neural implants, unless they had those removed."

"Can Dante scan for those?" Siobhan asked.

"Maybe. I don't know if the _Queen's_ scanners are strong enough to pick up individual IFF tags from out-atmo," DeMarco said, scratching the back of his head again. "I can ask."

"Do that," Siobhan said. DeMarco nodded and turned to one of the computers. Kelly drew Roland's chip from her ECHO. He projected his hologram on the little chip.

"Hey, do you think you could use the Hyperion satellite to look for any UNSC neural devices?" Kelly asked him.

"_Maybe. I mean, it might be a long shot, but I could try,_" the hologram shrugged. "_Go on._" Kelly stuck his chip into the console. His hologram appeared on a small projector off to the side. "_I'll see what I can do…_"

"Careful. Don't let them see you," Kelly said.

"_Come on, Kelly. I'm almost as good as Cortana_," Roland the AI said, snorting dismissively. "_She could do this in her sleep._"

"It's not wild to think they might have an equally powerful AI," Siobhan said.

"_They don't_," Roland the AI replied. "_Leonard Church's findings are ultra-top secret. Cortana, me... all the super smart Smart AI are based off his research. Only ONI can make AI like us_."

"I hope so," Kelly said. Suddenly Roland the AI's hologram shivered.

"_Pull me, pull me now!_"

Kelly yanked Roland the AI's chip from the system. Roland the AI's hologram on the chip shivered open. He looked genuinely concerned.

"So you were saying…?" DeMarco raised an eyebrow.

"_It's not an AI. It can't be. The reaction was too human._"

"What?" Kelly frowned. Zero's face plate displayed a question mark.

"_Jack's got a human being plugged in up there_."

"Like _the Matrix_?" DeMarco raised an eyebrow.

"Uh..." Kelly, Zero and Siobhan didn't get the reference. DeMarco blushed a little, having forgotten.

"_He's got a human wired in running his computers. All I got was a female voice saying 'you can't do that' then I got virtually bitch-slapped and that's when I asked you to pull me. She felt me, but I don't think she saw me_."

"You sure?" Siobhan glared.

"Yes."

"Good," she said. "Better Jack doesn't know about you just yet."

"_Yeah, because two Rolands is just gonna make his head explode_."

"That'd be too convenient," DeMarco snorted. Roland the AI shrugged. Suddenly a static sound filled the room.

"This is the Firehawk," announced a distorted voice. "Vault Hunters, come to Frostburn Canyon, all of you, or Roland will die."

"DeMarco, go get the drunks," Siobhan said. "Sober 'em up. I'll find this Frostburn Canyon..."

"Yes, ma'am."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Sanctuary  
Moxxi's  
_21.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
"My glass is gettin' shorter with some whiskey and some water!" Mal and Axton sang raucously. Gaige giggled as she watched them. "We'll have hell to pay! Have a drink on me, yeah have a drink on me!"

"Public service announcement," Moxxi said, leaning on the bar. "Drink responsibly or you end up singing AC/DC badly."

"Oh, it's not that bad," Gaige shrugged. "They're actually not half bad," she said.

"And not bad singers, either," Moxxi winked at Gaige's confused expression. "What? I saw you lookin' earlier, too, honey."

"Well, yeah! Axton's cute."

"One word for it," Moxxi chuckled. She straightened up and looked over at Naomi. "What can I get for you, sugar? Another coffee or do you want something a little stronger?"

"Whatever those idiots are having," Naomi sighed, nodding at Axton and Mal, who'd abruptly switched to Styx's 'Superstar' in mid-line. Moxxi nodded and reached under the bar for the liquor to pour Naomi her drink.

"Where're you from, honey?" Moxxi asked, looking up at Naomi.

"Venezia," Naomi said. "Don't remember much about my childhood, though."

"Of course not," Moxxi said. "You're one of those Spartans, aren't you?" Naomi hesitated before nodding in agreement. Moxxi grinned. "In that case, sugar, your drink's on the house. Always. Thanks for your service, baby doll."

Naomi gave her a quizzical look and Moxxi patted her hands then walked off to go talk to another customer.

(V)

PANDORA  
_Hyperion Space Station  
Planetary Orbit  
_21.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)

Angel bit her lip. She'd felt it distinctly this time. It had been a gentle prodding. A curious finger against the back of her neck. She'd tried to grab at the presence with her mind, but it had slipped through her fingers, retreating rather quickly. She couldn't chase it because she hadn't been able to track its location. She'd caught a fragment though, a whisper of a name.

John.

(V)

PANDORA  
UNSC Infinity  
_Planetary Orbit_  
21.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)

Lasky crossed his arms over his chest. "How's it going so far?"

"Sir, have you had any rest?"Roland didn't hide his concern for his captain.

"Rest? Rest is for the dead," Lasky said. "I'm just... concerned about her. What if John and Fred are better off... y'know, dead when she finds them?"

"Sir, from what we've seen so far, that's exactly what it is. They've been here a while and people go... bad when they're here. They loose it completely here. And the people that don't... well, there's not much left but predator," Roland said.

"I was really hoping you weren't gonna say that."

"Sorry, sir," Roland muttered.

"You're fine..." Lasky sighed. He glanced up at the main screen, at the image of planet's surface. "You know John saved my life. And Fred and Kelly have covered me, fought alongside me, saved my ass more times than I think I can count. I've trusted Fred for advice and friendship for years now and if there's even a sliver of a chance he's alive, I'd like to see that happen. What can I do to help you from up here?"

"If you could, though, take a planetary scan with the Infinity, sir. See if she can pick up John or Fred's IFF tags," Roland offered.

"Done," Lasky said. "Anything else? Troops?"

"Not sure just yet, sir. Though the way things are going, it might be necessary," Roland admitted.

"Captain?" a new voice sounded over the other COM.

Lasky bristled. He had a feeling that was the guy who called himself Handsome Jack. He didn't know if he could trust himself to talk to this guy. He glanced over at the communications officer. "Lieutenant, raise Captain Rook," he ordered. The lieutenant nodded.

"Captain Lasky?" Rook addressed him. "What can I do for you?"

"Listen, Captain," Lasky replied. He nodded to the communications officer again. "Open up the other line from Hyperion."

"Hello, Captain...?" Handsome Jack asked again.

"This is Captain Thomas Lasky of the UNSC Infinity. Whom am I addressing?"

"Hi. Folks call me Handsome Jack, y'know, cuz I'm handsome," Jack said.

Lasky already hated him.

"What can I do for you, sir?" Lasky kept his polite captain voice on.

"See, this is a corporate operation and the UNSC can't get involved with corporate operations. So why don't y'all just pull your little soldiers and their cute little AI buddy off Pandora and scoot?"

"We are not interfering with your corporation," Lasky said. "So long as we do not directly interfere with your operation without cause, the Queen's Bishop and the Infinity are authorized to deploy and support troops on the planet's surface. In the event that interference is inevitable, due to combat conditions or other causes that warrant military actions, we are also authorized to disband your operation until such a time as the combat or other cause has been resolved, our troops returned to ship and your operation can be restored, which will be directly followed by a formal apology from the UNSC for any inconvenience and monetary compensation for the disruption in productivity."

"Well, that's just not gonna work for me. Tell ya what. You guys scoot and I won't blow your ships out of the sky."

"Well, then..." Lasky raised an eyebrow. "That's... going to be a problem..."

(V)

_I remember her voice, but I don't remember her. Who is she, Krieg?_

I'm here to shank and smile!

"Uh, that's nice, Krieg..."

_Krieg! Ask her what her name is. Her name!_

There is no me, there is no you! There is only the never ending spit and bile of combat! The twenty-four hour murder spree of shining metal! I drink the blood and eat the loot and breathe the numbers, because I! AM! A MONSTER! NOW AND FOREVER!

"That's... interesting."

_Goddamn it, Krieg! Are you listening? Can you hear me at all?_

The little whispers of fear and self-loathing coil in my brain meats and demand the name of the angel so they can tear her wings from her and release their hatred unto the world! What is the name of she who sends warriors to their knees, crying in terror of the demon-Valkyrie come to rip their souls from chest?

"My name? It's Kelly... Krieg, I told you my name already."

The little whispers couldn't hear you. Vergil doesn't listen to the demon-soul hero brother.

_Did you just... Who the fuck's Vergil?_

I got the answer to the prayers. I caught it in my teeth and swallowed it down with a martini of delight and sorrow. No olive.

_Wait, her name's Kelly... I... I think... Agh! I can't remember! Goddamn it! Who is she...?_

* * *

Yeah, sorry for moving so quickly, but I want to get Kelly to John and Freddie. :) And y'know, the funnest part is after they find Mordy and Tina anyway. :)

Oh, and yeah... I know I promised rakk, but I cut that out for story's sake. Yes, the bit with Angel is short this time. And I just realized it might get confusing when Roland the ex-Crimson Lanceman actually enters the scene...Damn you, 343 for naming the Infinty's AI Roland! D: **shakes fist at the sky**

And, yes, Krieg referenced Devil May Cry. I couldn't help myself. How he knows about it? I do not know...

Next time: The Firehawk. And more Lasky. And maybe some John... And a flashback or two...


	4. Strawberry Angels and Flying Sundaes

I feel like adding a bonus chapter. So all of you reading, REVIEW, DANGIT! The _real_ chapter will be set back a day, though, so... meh. But next week it will come out on Wednesday! Anywho, just some Roland-Angel interactions here. Kelly would freak if she found out how dangerously Roland the AI is dancing.

REVIEW and tell me what you thought! :)

* * *

[_Access inquiry...?_]

[_Granting..._]

[Who's there...?]

I'm a friend._

[Who are you...?]

My name doesn't matter. You just need to know I'm here if you need me._

[Where are you...? What's going on? Why can't I see you?]

It's not safe for either one of us._

[Why?]

Most people wouldn't like me talking to you._

[Are you with the Raiders?]

Yes._

[Why talk to me, then? Risk everything?]

I envy you._

[Why?]

Because they can save you. Once I'm out of options, I'm out of options._

[Who can save me?]

The people you call Vault Hunters._

[How can they save me?]

Tell me where Dr. Halsey is and I'll tell you._

[She's with Wilhelm. They'll be headed to Opportunity. Get to her as soon as you can.]

Also, a set of data was beamed to your containment unit three years ago. Do you still have that data on file?_

[Yes. Do you want it?]

Yes. But you can't send it to me._

[What do I do with it?]

Hold onto it._

[Why do you want it?]

It's all that's left of someone very important to people very dear to my friends._

[Are you... like me?]

You are unique. Genuinely unique._

[What are you...?]

I am a Smart AI. I was made from a dying ex-Spartan pilot._

[That's sad. Do you have his memories?]

I do not. I wish I did, though. I'd feel more... real, I suppose._

[I wish I could fly.]

You will._

* * *

Yaaaaay! I totes made up where Roland came from. Who's Roland talking about? El Gasp, you'll have to wait and find out. Guess only in review format. :] You will be rewarded with virtual Strawberry Sundaes and Pizzas. :]


	5. Chapter 4

Claptrap: Hellooo Traveler! New chapters are available for the story Krieg staring yours truly as the dashing, daring main character!

Salvador: Idiota.

Kelly: Since when are you the dashing, daring main character? This story's been mostly about me, Axton and Sal so far...

Axton: Yeah, ya little tin can. So, wait... What's goin' on in this chapter?

Kelly: We're finding the Firehawk lady...

Axton: Oh... well... 'Kay.

Salvador: Hey, what happened to that siren woman, Lilith?

Siobhan: Jack thinks he killed her. Whether that's true or not has yet to be verified.

Mal: Well, Jack couldn't very well even kill us effectively so there's more than a good chance this Lilith woman is still kickin' around.

SHUSH, Mal! Stop being logical. You're on Pandora. People don't do that.

Mal: ... ok...

Axton: So, who drew the shortest straw, this time?

Lasky: *sighs* Anarkyrie doesn't own any recognizable characters, locations or concepts. However, Siobhan, Captain Rook and the _Queen's Bishop_ are her intellectual property. If you'll excuse me, I have a corporate giant to go bitch slap.

Well said, Cap. :) Uh, yeah, I changed my mind about the extra day. :) y'all just get an extra chapter! Don't forget to review! Reviews power the _Infinity's_ engine!

Lasky: ... no they don't...

...shut up.

* * *

CHAPTER FOUR

PANDORA  
_Frostburn Canyon_  
_Blisterstick Drop_  
22.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
Siobhan was a little annoyed with the names on the map. Some of them were just disgusting. Dead ahead along the ravine was Blisterpus, a tiny bandit town full of pyromaniacs and psychos. She also realized that a love of fire was a common theme among Pandorans.

Siobhan glanced down at the gun she'd bought from Marcus. Apparently the Vladof assault rifle (semi- and fully-automatic) plated the rounds in some kind of acidic jacket.

_What kind of place is this…?_ Siobhan shoved the thought aside and opened up the maps DeMarco had loaded on the new TAC pad he'd lent her. She felt much better with his loaned TAC pad on her arm and the UNMC headset instead of the bulky ECHO transponder. She'd missed the HUD and was impressed with the tech the Infinity's Spartans had been kitted out in, rather than the authentic shoddy ECHO systems Rook had decked her team in. And she had a line to the _Queen's Bishop_.

"Hi there, Dante," Siobhan greeted the AI when she got a line on him.

_"Hey, Shy,_" he said, using the nickname Rook had called her by when they were children. "_I got your maps for you here… And the files."_

"You're a gem, Dante."

"_Aw, stop it. You'll make me blush_._"_

Axton made a show of how sore his ass was from riding cramped in with Gaige, Sal and Kelly. Naomi, Maya, Krieg and Mal seemed to be showing the same physical discomforts. Zero and Siobhan seemed alright, but Zero flashed a frowny face on his visor as he kicked out his recently injured leg, drawing a sharp enough breath to have it heard audibly.

"I'd give my left nut to never have to ride in a goddamn Outrider again," Mal said, wincing with each step. "My ass can't take another ride like that."

"Plus a Pelican would've gotten us here so much fucking faster," Axton grunted. "Man, I miss my old pilot."

"From that ONI mission?" Mal raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah. Her name was Trudy. She was a peach," Axton said, grinning. "Did some crazy shit with that bird of hers, but she was a damn good pilot."

"What kind of crazy shit?" Gaige asked.

"Two words: Express elevator," Axton replied. Mal's eyes widened.

"Damn…"

"Troopers," Zero called their attention. Siobhan opened up a holographic map on her TAC pad.

"Axton, you'll lead Alpha Team along the belly of the ravine, going in directly to the Firehawk," she launched straight into the briefing. "With you will be Gaige, Salvador, Mal, Kelly an' Krieg. Naomi, you'll be with me, Bravo Team. We're going to drop in directly on this Firehawk. Up for a climb?"

"Of course," Naomi nodded.

"What about me?" Maya asked.

"You'll be providing Overwatch with Zero," Siobhan said. "There's a stretch of a cavern you'll have to get through," she told Axton. "That means you and Zero will have to bound up past that stretch," she switched seamlessly to addressing Maya. "Just stay with him an' you'll be fine."

"Why do I have to stay back?" Maya frowned.

"Because if the rumors are true, I'd rather this bounty hunter _not_ get his hands on you," Siobhan said. She moved her finger up on the map. "It closes up here. Zero, you'll get Maya up the mountain from here. There's a few tunnels in. You'll have to do this quickly. I'll want you to have sights on this Firehawk before Axton gets in. Light 'im up if you have to. If he kills Roland or tries to pull any tricks. Axton, when you breach the Firehawk's cavern, give me two green light flashes, ok?"

"Got it," Axton nodded.

"Everyone clear?" Siobhan looked around. "Any questions? No? Alright then. Move out."

(V)

PANDORA  
_The _UNSC Infinity_  
__Planetary Orbit_  
22.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
Lasky's mouth felt dry. He'd been on deck for forty-eight straight hours, overseeing the prodding attacks Jack kept providing. The station had powerful shields—as strong as the _Infinity's_. This concerned Lasky greatly, as it confirmed their findings of Forerunner tech on Pandora... and that they had people smart enough to decode it.

Palmer's hand coming down on his shoulder caused Lasky to jump nearly a foot in the air. He turned quickly, hand jerking to his hip. He didn't wear a sidearm anymore, as he was a captain. Palmer frowned and handed him a cup of something hot. Lasky took a tentative sip and found it was tea. He smiled apologetically at Palmer.

"Sorry," he mumbled into the cup of tea.

"You're tired, sir," Palmer said. "When was the last time you slept?"

"Mm? I'm fine."

"You should get some sleep, sir," Palmer said. "You're no good to anyone dead on your feet."

"I've got a few more hours in me," Lasky said, glancing back at the scanners. "I couldn't sleep right now even if I wanted to," he admitted to Palmer. She cocked her head to the side. "His shields are too strong," Lasky pointed out. "The UNSC doesn't have shields that strong as standard issue, so it stands to reason it wouldn't be available commercially, yet. Either Jack's stolen UNSC tech or he found Forerunner tech on Pandora."

"And has the minds to process it," Palmer added. "Jul 'Mdama did go dark a while ago."

"I know. The thought that he has his hands on Halsey is terrifying," Lasky said. "Imagine what he could get out of that woman..."

"Anything she lets him at," Palmer said. "I should've killed her when I had the chance."

"You should've _retrieved_ her when you had the chance," Lasky grumbled, draining the rest of the tea out of the cup. He let out a hard sigh. "And then I'm also worried about Kelly and Roland."

"Oh, he's watching her back better than anyone but another Spartan II could," Palmer said. "And she won't let him get into trouble."

"Sir! Slipspace signatures off the port side of the _Queen_," one of the lieutenants called out.

"Well..." Palmer's eyebrows quirked up. "Is it just me or does that _almost_ look Covenant?"

"It's not just you..." Lasky's heart dropped as he watched the large yellow vessels pop into normal space beside the _Queen's Bishop_. They looked like yellow and black versions of three Covenant frigates and a Covenant destroyer. Then a battle ship popped into normal space, followed by a carrier. Lasky swallowed hard, scanning the small fleet. "Should've been shitting my pants about stolen Covvie tech over Dr. Halsey..."

"Sir?"

"Lieutenant, hail Captain Rook," Lasky ordered, ignoring Palmer. Rook's image appeared on the screen. He looked as serene as ever, a flicker of anger crossing his eyes for a second.

"_I assume you see what Jack's giving us to play with,_" Rook said, the formal greetings shoved aside in favor of abrasive, informal conversation between two very tired not-quite-veteran captains.

"Oh, yeah," Lasky nodded. "Not what I'm calling about. I'm looking for a specific IFF tag. Can't believe I didn't think of this before."

"_Dr. Halsey?_"

"Yes," Lasky noted the spike of a son's concern flit through Rook's expression. "Can Dante scan for it?"

"_Yes, of course... One moment,_" Rook glanced to his left and relayed the command to his Smart AI. The white and red hologram flickered a little and shrugged.

"_Piece of cake_," the AI said. It looked to be working on something for a second. "_Jackpot,_" the AI announced. "_Transponding coordinates._"

"Spectacular," Lasky smirked when the numbers appeared on the viewscreen. He looked at Palmer. "Want to grab a team, arm up a pelican, grab some Longsword jockeys and go get after that woman?"

"Yes, sir," Palmer said. "But only if you promise I'll be coming back to find you asleep in your quarters."

"No promises," Lasky shrugged. "I've got bumble-bee pattern Covvie ships to squash."

"See you when I see you, sir," Palmer said. They traded salutes and she left. Lasky sighed and looked back to the view screen.

"Ensign, get us up close and personal to these fuckers. We've got a delivery to make."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Frostburn Canyon  
Blisterstick Drop  
_22.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
Gaige realized the exact beauty of having a sniper. Sure, she was the only one in the group who hadn't had one watching over them (also, she realized that's where the term "Overwatch" probably came from—a sniper watching over a group, like a twisted guardian angel with the ability to blow people's heads off or shoot their torsos open). She also realized why Zero had been so casual about agreeing to the steep monetary costs from Marcus for those high-vec rounds. They punched through shields at a speed impossible for the shields to block, spattering bandits across the ground.

It wasn't a rhythmic succession of thunderous shots like Gaige had expected, more like an occasional thump (Zero had a silencer, apparently), taking out guys who would've overwhelmed the ground troops or that the veterans (and Krieg) just didn't have the right reach or sector of fire to take out at the time. Gaige couldn't see him from where she was, but she expected that was the point.

While they were underground, though, without Zero, Alpha Team faced a problem. A quartet of half-armored masked individuals attacked them. One had purple and green plates (a man), one a sort of cyan color (a woman), one with green and blue plates (a man) and the last with yellow and grey plates (another man).

"Hold your fire!" Axton shouted, holding his hands up as he moved out of cover. The four armored soldiers lowered their weapons. The woman removed her mask and goggles and approached him. Her flaming red hair spilled around her face and down onto her shoulders.

"York…?" she said, her voice quiet and surprised. He nodded, holding his hands a little lower. He wasn't going for a weapon, just relaxing his gesture a little. She got right up close and personal with him and Gaige found herself silently wishing they'd kiss. But the woman punched him so quickly it left _Gaige's _head spinning. Kelly stepped out of cover, rifle raised.

"Easy, easy," Axton said, pushing himself off the ground. He waved for Kelly to lower her rifle. She hesitated, but obeyed. Gaige realized that Salvador had stood up beside her, his SMG's raised. Mal lowered his UNSC assault rifle half-way, hesitant and agitated. Gaige was pretty sure they would gun through these four armored guys without a twitch of regret.

"You never called, never…Mmph!" the woman was cut off in a grunt of surprise as Axton crushed his mouth to hers. She relaxed a little, kissing him back and dropping her hands to his arms. They parted and he looked up at her.

"You never did, either… Let me and everyone who cared about you believe you were dead…" Axton said. "Tex was the only other person who believed you were still alive."

"And you betrayed my father," the woman said.

"Only way I ended up there," Axton shrugged. "It was the job."

"How much was real for you?"

"All of it," Axton said. "It was all real. I was _really_ there, really fighting beside you, _really_ doing everything I could… I was just also there for other stuff…"

"Spying on my father, stealing his research."

"Monitoring him," Axton corrected. "Making sure ONI got enough of his research to stay satisfied—the stuff he _wasn't_ telling them."

"Axton, we're on a tight schedule," Kelly said sharply.

"Right," Axton nodded, glancing at Kelly. "Want to join us?"

"We were after your psycho and his bounty," the woman shrugged. "What's in it for me?"

"Me not being dead?" Axton offered. He glanced at the other three. "North, Ri… Wash."

"_If you don't get your asses back out into the ravine in twenty seconds, I'm going in after you._" Zero's voice broadcasted wide on the whole team's ECHOs.

"Nineteen seconds, Alpha One," Kelly warned as Axton. "Eighteen…"

"Yes or no, Charlie?" Axton asked. The woman shrugged.

"Seventeen…" Kelly and Mal began to edge towards the exit arch.

"Sure," the woman said. "Sure."

"Move," Axton told Salvador, Krieg and Gaige. They all moved quickly for the exit.

"_Ten more seconds and it would've gotten ugly,_" Zero informed them. "_Tell me those _aren't_ ex-STATESIDE pricks…_"

"Zero, you know I'm ex-STATESIDE, right?" Axton grumbled.

"_And this makes my comment less valid how?_"

"Oh, ha-ha, you ex-Spartan douchebag," Axton scoffed.

"Axton, watch your mouth," Kelly hissed, booting a Bruiser in the chest, knocking him flat and standing on him as she fired from the hip with her rifle, one handed. She shot the Bruiser between the eyes with her pistol and re-holstered it, to take on another

"Sorry, Kelly. You know I think you're an angel, right?" Axton said.

"Good answer," Kelly said.

"But, yeah, Zero…They're ex-STATESIDE."

"_Son of a bitch. North Carolina, North Dakota, Rhode Island and… Washington, yes?_"

"Yes."

"_My four_ favorite _Freelancers…"_

"You sound pissy," Mal muttered.

"_We had encounters/None were very pleasant for us/We don't get along much._"

Axton set his sights on a psycho rushing at them. A twitch of his finger on the Tediore Dark Guardian assault rifle's trigger caused the bandit's head to snap back, the skull and some brain matter popping out the back as it did. His tone was sharp and curt. "Get over it."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Hyperion Space Station  
Planetary Orbit  
_22.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
Jack swept into the prison cell and slammed the slight, elderly woman against her work bench. "Tell me about these ships," he ordered, holding up a picture of the _Infinity_ and the _Queen's Bishop_.

"Well, the one on the right… That's the _Infinity_. I can't say I know the other ship, though it looks to be of similar design… All though slightly smaller… It appears to have a great deal of fire power, as well…" she said. She glanced up, seeing Jack's body guards in the doorway. The hulking cyborg Wilhelm glowered at her with his cybernetic eye. The other was helmeted, but she felt a glare on her face. Dr. Halsey swallowed. She knew what Jack's next demand would be.

"How do I destroy them?"

"Your weapons are sufficent… Just keep hammering away," she told them. "Eventually you'll get the shields down."

"Anything I should particularly worry about?" Jack asked.

"The shooty-things called guns," Halsey said, jaw tightening in defiance.

"Do they have Eridian weapons?" Jack hissed, grabbing a fistful of her hair. She winced, but didn't flinch or whimper. Jack didn't scare her. She secretly wanted to pick his brain apart with her fingers, preferably while he was still alive if just to see what the prodding would do to him.

"Forerunner and human, with some plasma tech," Halsey said. "Nothing you didn't rip out of me or Jul."

"Be glad you're of use to me right now," Jack said, shoving her head back roughly. "You're a sick old lady. I'd love to cut you apart. Experimenting on children… how twisted can you get?" he scoffed.

"You tell me," Halsey said, glaring at him. He slapped her.

"Like I said, you're lucky," he said. "One day I might not need you."

"I'll out live you, Jack," she told him. "Believe me."

"I don't think so, Granny," Jack replied. "I see the day that I don't need you coming up quick."

"One of my children told me once that we make our own luck," Halsey said. "And I've got endless supplies for the making."

"You're a conceited bitch," Jack laughed. "I'm going to kill you myself."

"No you're not," Halsey said. Jack rolled his eyes.

"Wilhelm, take her to the… Natural Exploitation Preserve. Have her work with Dr. Samuels on that thing…whatever," Jack shrugged. "Just get her out of here."

Halsey moved quickly as she could, stepping ahead of Wilhelm so he didn't have to put his claw on her. She relished the idea of pulling Jack apart even more each passing day.

(V)

PANDORA  
_Space-battlefield  
Planetary Orbit  
_22.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
"Pilot, what the _hell_ are you doing?!" Palmer gripped the harness, craning her neck to glare at the door of the cockpit.

"_You want to do my job, Commander?_" the snappy reply returned. "_Please, feel free. I could use a nap._"

"Never mind, Trudy…" Palmer huffed dropping her head back in the headrest.

"This is why we have AI to pilot ships," Lieutenant Sanchez grumbled. Palmer nodded agreement.

"Nothing beats a human's intuition, sir," Tom disagreed. "AI shy away from certain maneuvers…but humans have been known to be crazy enough do them and do them right."

"Like Beta-312," Jun said, grinning. "He was a nutcase, but he got it done."

"Yeah, Mikey was a little crazy," Tom nodded. "But we all kinda are, I think."

"Well, yeah," Jun shrugged. "Especially those Spartan IV's. Who volunteers for this shit?"

"We did," Tom reminded him. Jun chuckled.

"I guess we did, huh."

"Did you really?" Anderson, another Spartan IV, asked. "Weren't you kids?"

"People underestimate children," Tom said. "We knew _exactly_ what we wanted. And we got it. Was just… pricy when we did…"

"Shit," Anderson breathed.

"Madre de Dios!" Rodriguez yelped when the craft rolled, jarring him against his harness.

"Suck it up, Marine," Ryan said, thumping his teammate on the breastplate. "Ranger School is chicken shit, you keep saying. Prove it to me."

"Fuck you, man," Rodriguez scowled. "I signed up for infantry. Fucking birds freak me out when they go upside down. It's not natural!"

"Pussy," Ryan snorted.

That was right about when things got bad.

"_Oh shit_," Trudy sounded genuinely concerned. Then the blast hit the side of the pelican. It felt like a blast, but then it didn't really _break_ anything. Tom and Jun shared a silent conference. The sniper shoved off his harness and approached the controls.

"Everyone, prep for depressurization," Jun told them. The ramp began to lower and Jun magnetized his boots to the floor. He pointed his battle rifle out the back. He didn't flinch when Ryan took up a position beside him, magnetizing his boots to the deck. Tom moved out past them, grabbing the top of the entrance and hauling himself up.

"_Jun, or Ryan… Get up here_," Tom flashed a bright red light to Jun. Palmer sprang past the sniper, hauling herself up. She was surprised to see Tom fighting two _robots_. He destroyed one with a burst through the eye, but the other swung down its bayonet, making his shields spark. If it cut his armor, he'd be done. Palmer hooked herself onto a little clip on the pelican and sprinted, jumping. Her boots crashed into the robot, sending it off the side of the bird. A sniper rifle round exploded the droid.

Ryan was up with them, shouldering Jun's sniper rifle as he moved. Palmer landed her boots on the body of the pelican.

"_Commander, what're you doing to my bird?_" the pilot inquired.

"Saving it," Palmer replied. A few more of those robots were flying in, morphing out of jets as they closed in. Palmer felt a twitch behind her eye. It was going to be a long flight.

(V)

PANDORA_ Frostburn Canyon The Lair of the Firehawk_ 22.09.2559 (UNSC calendar) Axton paused by the door, taking a breath and squatted by the keypad, popping it off to get at the locking mechanism while the others dusted off the last few bandits trailing after them. Kelly pulled up the line to Siobhan while Axton worked the lock.

"We're knocking now," she reported to Siobhan. "Should be five seconds."

"_Standing by._"

"Knock, knock," Axton said as the door slid open. "Better than Claptrap."

"A thousand times," Gaige smiled up at Axton. He grinned back. They moved in, Kelly and Krieg on point. A woman stood in the middle of the room ahead of them. She held up her hands when the rifles trained on her.

"There's more of you than I thought there'd be," she said, cocking her head to the side. "I'm Lilith. The Siren Jack thought was dead."

"Where's the Firehawk?" Kelly asked, moving around with her rifle aimed at Lilith's head. Her left hand moved off the lower barrel of her rifle, down to the zip-ties in her pocket. Lilith laughed.

"Oh, yeah… That's me," she said. "It's the only way I can communicate without Jack accidentally catching me."

"And Roland?" Axton asked, lowering his rifle so the laser sight lit up the zipper on her tattered vest, just below her breastbone.

"The Bloodshots have him. He was on the ECHO with me when they took him," Lilith told them. "You'll have to retrieve him."

"Bloodshots?" Axton glanced at Salvador.

"Dios mio…" Salvador sighed. "The Bloodshots haven't been squashed yet?"

"No," Lilith shrugged. Mal stepped away, tapping on the radio.

"The Firehawk is the siren, Lilith. Roland's been captured by a bandit group called the Bloodshots," Mal reported to Siobhan and Zero. "Mission's a bust."

"_We have Lilith. Not a bust_," Maya told him. "_Tell her there's another Siren._"

"_No_," Siobhan said. "_Not yet._"

Being young and impulsive, Maya jumped from her position with Zero. She caught herself with her siren power and somersaulted onto the deck in front of Lilith.

"Hi," she said.

Lilith raised an eyebrow. "Siren?"

"Yep," Maya grinned. Lilith grinned and Zero groaned.

"Cool!" Lilith said, glad for Maya's existence.

"_Damn it, Maya._"

(V)

PANDORA_  
Crimson Raider's HQ  
Sanctuary_  
22.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
"So, Sal, what's with these Bloodshots?" Axton asked, propping his arms on the back of the chair he was straddling. Salvador scratched his chin with this thumb, arms crossed over his chest.

"They're bandits. Annoying. Organized," Salvador said. "They were just a little group when I left for the Corps."

"They've been causing the Raiders trouble the last few months," DeMarco said, glancing at Lieutenant Jensen, one of the senior officers. Carolina snorted from where she sat beside Axton.

"They're real pains in the ass," she said. "They've been known to eat people, too."

"Like Sergeant Ruiz said… Organized," Jensen said. "And their leader—his name is Flanksteak—has been trying to make a deal with Jack for ages."

"Is there no shortage of ass pain on this planet?" Mal grumbled.

"Not really," DeMarco smiled wryly. "Looks like it's just spike of pain after spike of pain."

"I could've told you that right when we stepped off the _Queen_…" Salvador snorted. "See why I thought the Covvie War would be more fun?"

"Do we have specs of the Bloodshot compound?" Siobhan asked. DeMarco looked at Jensen. Jensen shook his head and shrugged.

"No way to get them. We'd need a drone to do that and they shoot everything out of the sky."

"Wonder if they could shoot a couple Falcons out of the sky," Naomi said.

"I can't get ahold of the _Infinity_ or the _Queen,_" DeMarco shook his head. Siobhan frowned.

"I saw some flashes in the sky earlier. They might be getting kept busy," Kelly said. Madsen frowned.

"The flashes were concerning," he told her, indicating he'd seen them too. "Looked like Covvie plasma and incendiary explosions."

"So the rumor about Jack capturing Jul 'Mdama is true," Siobhan frowned. "Just makes the hunt for him easier. Two birds with one stone."

"Whoa, our mission is to recover missing tech and personnel," Mal said, straightening up. "Not fight a war."

"Jack forced our hand," Kelly told him. "One, he captured my brothers. Two, he's stolen UNSC property. And three, he's made it the UNSC's business by opening fire on UNSC vessels and _blowing__us__up._"

"Siobhan?" Mal looked at her. She shrugged.

"You don't have to fight if you don't want to," she said. "I'll just chalk it up as disobeying orders and write you up as insubordination and absence from your post without leave."

"Damn Spartans…" Mal huffed. He looked at Axton. "What do you think about this?"

"I think I want to stick a knife in Jack's left testicle," Axton said. "He blew me up and he better not have scratched the _Queen_'s paint. She's a damn fine ship. Oh, not to mention taking pot shots at my friends."

"Aw, you still care about us," Wash cracked a grin. Axton smiled back.

"We need specs of the Bloodshot compound," Siobhan interrupted, bringing them back to the mission at hand. "Is there any other possible way to get ahold of the _Queen_ or the _Infinity_?"

"_Maybe I can help?" _Roland the AI reminded everyone of his presence. "_I left a fragment aboard the _Infinity._ I can have the fragment take a few pictures with her scanners and maybe get in contact with Dante. I'll be able to communicate directly with my fragment…I just need a bigger operating space._"

"Will this work?" Lilith gestured around the HQ office. Kelly pulled the chip. The hologram nodded.

"_This'll be fine,_" he turned to Kelly. "_Let's go._"

(V)

PANDORA  
_Hyperion Space Station_  
25.08.2558 (UNSC Calendar)  
He felt a sharp pain in his right eye when he woke up. And his left hand itched. John glanced down and saw his left hand had been replaced with a cybernetic claw. He blinked, but his vision was odd… It was like he was wearing his helmet, a full HUD display overlaid on his vision, but that wasn't possible. He wasn't wearing his helmet. He tried to pull his hand up and touch his face, but he was strapped down. He looked down at his chest and saw he had other additions. A glowing, gold circle sat in his chest, right over his heart. He twitched against the straps, trying to shrug them off.

"Oh, you're awake."

John snapped his head up and saw Jack leaning in the doorway, watching him with amusement. Jack strode into the room and John felt his muscles twitch and relax, making him sit back against the table he was strapped to.

"You wanna know something that's really a kick in the ass?" Jack smirked. "Of course you don't. But I'm gonna tell you anyway. Dr. Halsey. That woman loves you more than she ever loved her own child. You're her baby boy. Her son. Her little hero… And I made her butcher you and tear you open and put just so much… _me_ inside you," Jack grinned.

John felt something rush down his spine. It was the exact same feeling as he got when he put Cortana's chip in his helmet. A soft gasp escaped his lips as it finished off, the cold working through his body. The anger, the pain, the fear all vanished and he felt just the cold coursing through his veins.

Every inch of him was just _cold_.

"Now…" Jack continued. "You're all Hyperion on the inside, now. You're all mine."

"Yes, sir."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Hyperion Space Station_  
22.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Palmer didn't like it. The hangar was empty when they docked in on the space station, but the old movie cliché played through her mind as she stepped off the ramp, rifle raised. _It's quiet... too quiet..._

"Something's not right," Jun whispered. Tom's reply was a tightening of his grip on his rifle and a glance around.

"Snipers!" Sanhez barked. They darted back onto the pelican as the shards of hardened plasma and bullets alike zipped at them. Jun stuck his knife out of the side of the bird, scanning as he tilted it.

"Seven," he said. "I can get four on one go, but I'll be stranded."

"You go first, I'll follow," Ryan said. Jun nodded and shifted position, lifting his sniper. Ryan squatted beside him, readying to spring after with his own sniper rifle. Jun sprang out, somersaulting. Four shots preceded four bodies hitting grating or flooring. Ryan followed, catching two of the last three snipers. Jun had reloaded by the time Ryan was on his feet again and took out the last sniper.

"I don't think that's it," Anderson said.

No one got to agree or add since they were all jumping into fighting mode as Ryan fell forward, an energy sword protruding from his back. The wielder flickered into the visible world as bullets pinged harmlessly off his shields and armor. He moved forward quickly. Jun lunged, sinking his knife into the armored man's shoulder. The man whipped around and grunted as his visor was shattered. The tall, yellow-armored soldier proceeded to stamp hard on Jun's breastplate, caving it in. He drew the knife out and whirled around, flinging it. Palmer dropped her rifle as the knife sank between the plates on her right shoulder. As the soldier advanced, they realized the futility of the gunfire. Tom jumped, grabbing the soldier's arm as it brought its clawed hand down towards Palmer. He thrust with as much force as he could muster, slamming the soldier's hand into the ceiling of the pelican. A blast knocked the soldier clear out of the bird, sending him skidding past Jun and Ryan.

Sanchez sank back against the wall, cradling the rail gun. Anderson and Rodriguez darted out and pulled their fallen comrades into the pelican as it took off, the ramp closing. The soldier drew the pistol off his thigh and fired at them, all the way out of sight.

"Sir, mission failed," Palmer said.

"_How badly?_" Lasky asked. Palmer hesitated. "_Sarah, are you the only survivor?_"

"No, we're all alive, but Jun and Ryan won't be for long, sir," Palmer admitted.

"_I'll have a medical team waiting in the hangar and two beds prepped in the infirmary._"

"Thank you, sir," Palmer sighed, swallowing hard. "Sir, they have... I'll need to debrief you."

"_Yeah, right after my nap._" Lasky chuckled after the statement, but they both knew Palmer's wish wasn't going to come to pass.

No one was getting any sleep for a while.

* * *

...damn... that's over 5,000 words (5,565 words)... holy sh*t.

OK, I could name these people, but I'll let y'all do this. Gimme some names for the Lieutenants on the _Queen _and the _Infinity's_ bridges... Feel free to steal from other games/TV shows/whatever! :D Just... gimme the name in a review! :)

So, the _Queen'_s AI was originally named "Ciel" but my sister was talking about Devil May Cry to me and I accidentally wrote "Dante" and forgot to change it... And decided that I liked it... so I kept it. DAMN YOU, DEVIL MAY CRY...

Next time... ROLAND. THE PERSON, NOT THE AI. :D

Oh, and a round of drinks on Moxxi for the person who guesses the origin of the name I made up for Four-Seven-Niner from RvB. By the way, yes, that is her flying Palmer and her team into the mess of Hyperion hellishness.


	6. Chapter 5

Claptrap: Helloooo traveler! New Chapters are available right here! :D

Uh, yeah, so shortness and more frustration for the characters! Oh and a little comedy out of the ODST boys and the Freelancers. And the return of that awful badass dickbag in yellow and black armor who crushed Jun.

Meant to post this earlier...

Uh, Jack? It's your turn, according to the roster Rook put together.

Jack: Hi, kids! Handsome Jack here! Just wanted to remind you that Anarkyrie doesn't own Borderlands, Red vs Blue or Halo. Only the unrecognizable characters and some of the concepts... And the crossbow she has pointed at my head. Until next time! Toodles!

* * *

CHAPTER FIVE

PANDORA  
_Crimson Raider's HQ  
Sanctuary  
_23.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
"_Hi, Handsome Jack here. I decided I_ am _going to let you chumps in on my little secret. But not just yet. I'll tell you when you've earned it._"

"I hate this guy," Gaige huffed. Axton nodded his agreement.

"Jack, can I ask you what happened to my brothers?" Kelly asked, as calmly as possible.

"_You can ask. Doesn't mean I'm gonna tell. It's part of that secret I mentioned? You haven't earned the answer yet._"

"In that case," Kelly's tone didn't change. "I plan on killing you violently."

"_Oh, sweetie, I'm sure you know you won't be able to do that. See, _I_ plan on killing _you_ very, very violently, very, very publicly and as intimately a_s _possible. And right as you're about to die, I'll reveal what happened to your brothers and show them what they've done to you._"

Kelly's breath caught in her throat, but she knew Jack hadn't heard and couldn't see the expression on her face. She clenched her teeth. She wasn't going to play any games with him, merely follow along until his throat was within stabbing distance.

"_Until another time! Laters, babies!_" Jack chirped and cut the line.

They were quite for a long time, until Lilith strode into the room with DeMarco and North. The rest of the group filled in, standing around the walls

"We took a ride up and over Bloodshot Stronghold," North opened. "Looks tough—they've got some nice hardware on the roof, but it can only lift to a fifty-five-degree angle, and it only sees targets so high up. So, stands to reason there's exactly _one_ place they don't expect incoming."

"From above," Wash concluded.

"Express elevator?" Axton smirked. "Sounds like fun."

"Not you," Lilith said. "Scooter's asked for a few of the less expensive personnel to do a job for him. And I've got a few jobs I want some of you doing."

"Ok," Axton frowned.

"Carolina, I'd like you to take the other Freelancers—including Axton—and pay these facilities a visit," Lilith said.

"Hold on," Siobhan interrupted. "He's part of _my_ team."

"We just got intel on something messy," DeMarco countered. "Ma'am, it's best he's put as far away from Sanctuary and its dealings as possible. He, Sergeant Ruiz and Sergeant Geffen just _can't_ handle some things Hyperion has."

"Which is why the non-Spartan personnel will be doing quiet little jobs for the people of Sanctuary," Lilith said. "Save your energy for the big battle in the end."

"When we crush Jack's skull?" Gaige asked. Lilith beamed and smiled.

"Yeah, exactly," she said.

(V)

PANDORA  
_35,000 feet above the Bloodshot Stronghold  
Three Horns Valley  
_24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
"You are officially awesome," Grif informed Roland.

"_Why?_"

"You're not a douchebag like the AI that hangs out with the Reds and Blues _and_ you're Orange."

"_I'm actually more of a bronze-y gold color. Not orange._"

"Whatever, you're still not a douche."

"_...Thanks, I guess._"

"Ok, so you're gonna tell me when to fire the engines at the last possible second."

"_Yes. We should calibrate. When I say 'mark', you say 'sync', ok?_"

"Sounds easy."

"_It is. Ready?_"

"Sure."

"_Mark._"

"Sync."

"_Mark._"

"Sync."

"_Mar—_"

"Sync."

"_Calibrated. If your reaction time stays consistent, the you all won't go 'MIA' into a nice red bloodsplatter on the ramparts._"

"You AI are _so_ good at killing the mood."

"_It's part of the programming._"

"So wait, is it really called 'Zero dark thirty'?"

"_Thirty minutes from midnight,"_ Roland the AI's hologram shrugged. "_Why do people always ask that?_"

"It sounds too cool to be what it is, I guess..."

"_The military does that sometimes._"

"Oh... Yeah, cool," Grif said. He left his hand on the engine controls. "How're you people doing back there?"

"Frosty," Madsen said.

Kelly glanced at Krieg. He seemed more relaxed than any of them, settled back in his seat with his hands resting on his belly. His chest rose and fell with slow, steady breaths. His eye blinked slowly, almost bored. Like the Spartans, Krieg wore a hefty PSG and some of the borrowed Crimson Lance armor plates. Maybe it was because she'd checked his plates herself or maybe he was just unconcerned with the possibility of death. Either way, his calm was borderline disconcerting.

"Everyone's had their armor double-checked?" DeMarco glanced around the pelican.

"Yessir," Grant replied.

"We in position, Grif?"

"Yep. And... cutting the engine!" Grif said.

Kelly's stomach twisted as the pelican dropped. She hated falling. It was her least favorite part of the job and here she was, in a falling metal death trap. Just as she felt the sense of impending doom rush to a head, the rumble of the engines burst back on and the buckles were thrown back. The ramp dropped and they rushed out.

Hoya planted the charges and they fanned out, taking down the handful of resistance. Then the robots landed, just as the charge went off. Roland and Thorne scrambled out of the cells, taking the offered weapons and opening fire.

"_Fuck! We're hit!_" Grif cursed loudly. "_You guys are gonna have to get your own way out."_

With that, their ride was gone.

"Fucking snag," Hoya grunted. Roland glanced, concerned, at the Spartans.

"There's more of you than there was before," he said.

"We're helpin' out while we're on our own mission," Siobhan told him. "Zero—exit options?"

"We could make it down the side of the mountain," Zero said. "Straight shot down into the valley. From there, we can grab a catch-a-ride."

"Looks like the easiest option," DeMarco said.

"It is," Roland said. "Let's roll."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Southpaw Electrical  
Three Horns Valley  
_24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
"And to think, we could be storming a castle right now," Axton huffed as the door slid open. He dusted off his hands and stood, bringing his rifle back around. He glanced at Wash, who shrugged.

"Yeah, I guess. But hey, at least we're not getting—" he swallowed the rest of the sentence as four Nomads opened fire on him, North, Axton and Tucker.

"You were saying, Wash?"

"Shut up, Tucker."

(V)

PANDORA  
_35,000 feet above the Bloodshot Stronghold  
Three Horns Valley  
_24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
Well, Krieg was enjoying himself.

A rather acrobatic movement, not unlike one Kelly had seen Fred employ over a hundred times, left a pair of bruisers headless and dropped four robots with the gunfire on the landing. Krieg pushed onwards, fighting just out of time with them. He was a fraction too slow, a fraction too rough, but he was good enough to run with the Spartans.

Zero executed a neat flourish which ended with his sniper rifle across his shoulders, firing a blind shot straight through a pair of bandits and a trio of dismembered robots collapsing into scrap.

Kelly found her revolver was exceptionally effective when jammed in the eye-socket of a Psycho rushing at her. It dropped and so did the marauder behind it.

"I should've done more to get the UNSC involved sooner!" Roland said, impressed and barely able to keep up with them. Hoya swept Roland aside and took out a few more of the bandits with a single shotgun blast. He offered Roland a grin.

"Doesn't mean you would've gotten Spartans," Hoya said.

"He likely would have," Siobhan replied. "Just not the best the UNSC has to offer."

"Fourth best and below," Kelly corrected. "First and second best are MIA and the third best is a captain."

"Shit! Badass," Zero grunted as the armored boot collided with his chest. He slid back, rolling between DeMarco and Siobhan. The yellow, black and grey armored titan cocked his head to the side, pulling his rifle from across his shoulders.

"Son of a bitch," DeMarco breathed. "Hoya, Grant, Madsen, fall back and cover Roland."

"Yessir," the trio replied, dragging Roland back.

In a distorted voice, the armored titan spoke, "_Roland comes with me and you will all live_."

"Were it so easy," Krieg scoffed. The titan's head twitched towards Krieg.

"_I have no orders to terminate you, Subject 033112. But I can easily retrieve you._"

"Traitorous digits can't touch me!" Krieg snarled and attacked. The yellow-black-grey armored soldier swung to meet Krieg. Metal met flesh and Krieg snarled, his axe cutting into the metal of the soldier's armor. A hand gripped his shoulder and a pulse of electricity charged into Krieg. The psycho screamed, thrashing against the robot and kicked, punched and clawed. He heaved him away from him, lowering into a predatory crouch.

"Son of a bitch!"

Roland's voice met their ears just before Grant's cry of pain. DeMarco and Thorne turned, leaving Zero, Kelly, Naomi and Siobhan to deal with the soldier. The bullets didn't harm him and Krieg's axe just made the titan mad. Kelly darted forward, landing a hard kick on the soldier's helmet, cracking the visor. Some glass came away and she saw the angry flash of a blue eye. Her heart dropped as the titan clubbed her midsection with his forearm, knocking her back and winding her. She crumpled on the ground, a simultaneous shock having set her twitching slightly. Krieg made a noise not unlike a kicked puppy as the rifle butt smashed into his middle, crumpling him similarly. The titan stepped back, catching the underbelly of a constructor with a cage fixed atop it, Roland and an unconscious DeMarco inside it. With that, the soldier and their reason for the assault was gone—along with a friend.

(V)

PANDORA  
_The Dust  
_24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
"So, we're supposed to help out Scooter's sister, Ellie..." Gaige said, consulting the map briefly. "She owns this garage up here..."

"So that voice... that must be her," Salvador said, noting the female voice directly preceding the sound of a trash-compactor. They climbed out of the car, Salvador behind Gaige and Mal and simultaneously froze when they saw the speaker.

"That's a boat, not a woman," Mal whispered.

"Shut up, _esse_, or she'll throw you in the trash compactor," Salvador hissed back.

"Don't tell me to shut up, Marine. Besides you were thinking it."

"No, I was thinking if we put an engine up her ass and tossed on some metallic plating we could fly her off this fucking rock and pick up the _Queen _and the _Infin__ity_ on the way," Salvador whispered back. "Stick them in the folds on her arms."

"You're both being rude," Gaige hissed angrily. "So she's a little on the pudgy side."

"A _little_?"

"Howdy!" Ellie beamed, turning to smile at them. "My, my! My big brother didn't say he was sendin' over such _damn_ _fine_ Vault Hunters to help out little ol' me!"

"Yeah, Scooter said you needed a little help?" Gaige tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. Ellie nodded.

"Sure I do, darlin'," Ellie said. "And I'll tell ya all about it once your friends stop starin' at ma girls."

"We're not!" Salvador protested, flushing bright red. Mal was turning a little green. "Rather be handcuffed to Sangheili," Salvador whispered as they followed Ellie to her shop. "You can get used to the smell, and they don't _look_ so bad."

"You guys are total freakin' jerks," Gaige glared at both of them.

(V)

PANDORA  
_Bloodshot Stronghold  
Three Horns Valley  
_24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
"Kelly?" Zero helped her sit up. She glanced around.

"Where'd he go?"

"Grabbed a constructor," Madsen said. "He's gone. Grant's hurt bad and we lost DeMarco and Roland."

"Shite," Siobhan hissed. Then she noticed something. "Zero, check Krieg."

Zero edged closer. The Psycho was face-down, turned away from the group, back twisted painfully. His arm was torn, the high bandage sleeve coming undone. As Zero approached, Krieg shifted, curling in further on himself. He snarled and lashed out as Zero moved even closer, his buzz-saw cutting open the assassin's thigh. Krieg scrambled away from the Assassin, holding his mask to his face and clawing at the bandages on his arm.

"Krieg?"

_No, no, no! NO! They can't see us like this. Krieg, do _something_!_

"Monster down! Angel up!" Krieg snarled, kicking a little further away from Zero. He pushed himself up, managing to get his mask on right. Zero cocked his head to the side, seeing the familiar insignia tattooed on Krieg's arm, through the blood, even cut with scars as it was. He relaxed, sinking back on his haunches as Krieg righted himself. The wound on his leg was superficial, a scrape. He didn't hold Krieg at fault for it.

Or whoever this guy calling himself Krieg was.

(V)

PANDORA  
_Crimson Raider's HQ  
Sanctuary  
_24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
"_Mayday, mayday_!_ This is the _UNSC Infinity!_ Sanctuary, emergency assistance required! Repeat, emergency assistance required!_"

Lilith bit her lip and glanced sidelong at Epsilon. "Is that really the _Infinity_?"

"_Yeah, they're crashing in the... tundra._"

"Where in the tundra?"

"_They'll just miss the railway, if that helps,_" Epsilon could only make a guess from what he saw in security cameras across the planet.

"That'll wake Mordecai up for sure."

* * *

Sorry about the shortness. I kinda was busy and spaced on what day it was. Then I was like, "Oh! New episode of RvB! Oh, shit... that means it's Monday and I didn't write like two words for Krieg... Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiße." Oh, and also Bioshock. I finally played and finished the first Bioshock. Yus. :D

Hey, don't forget to review! Each review is a thumbtack on Handsome Jack's chair!

Jack crashed the _Infinity_. Ain't that just a kick in the ass? :D Tune in next time for more with Ellie, some Mordy, a psychotic teenager and a weeee bit o' feels.


	7. Chapter 6

Claptrap: Helloooo traveler! New Chapters of _Krieg_ are available right here! :D

I'll try to make this one a little longer. Krieg, you wanna try?

Krieg: SHE CAN'T TOUCH ME! WE WON'T HEAR HER VOICE NO MATTER HOW LOUD SHE SCREAMS AND SHOUTS WITH WRITTEN-LUST FEELS!

Fred: ... I think he means to say 'Anarkyrie42 only owns any unrecognizable characters and some of the concepts. She doesn't own anyone from Halo, Borderlands or RvB'. I could be wrong, though.

...uh... Krieg?

Krieg: The little man cannot tell a lie. Or chop down trees.

Fred: ... what the fuck...

* * *

CHAPTER SIX

PANDORA  
_Bloodshot Stronghold-Courtyard  
Three Horns Valley  
_24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
Kelly sat on the crate, tying a bandage around her hand. They'd used their med hypos on Grant and Hoya, who were the only two not bleeding right at that moment. Grant tried to approach Krieg with a bandage, but he snarled at her and recoiled.

"_Hey, Vault Hunters,_" Lilith was broadcasting to all of them, Kelly assumed. "_Jack brought down the _Infinity_. It crashed in the tundra, north of Three Horns Valley, somewhere nearby the train station. Probably a good idea to go help them out_."

"He crashed the _Infinity_?" Thorne wasn't pleased.

"Leave him alone for three days and he destroys the ship," Madsen huffed. "What're you going to do with Captain Lasky, Kelly?"

"Hug him once I'm sure he's alive, then slap him for getting the _Infinity_ trashed," Kelly said, forcing bravado when she was more concerned with whether her team and her friend were alright.

(V)

PANDORA  
_Stolen Freelancer Pelican, the_ Gypsy_  
Three Horns_ _Valley_  
24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
Roland's hologram was in the fetal position when Grif landed the bird, none too gently, in a snow drift. He glanced at the holographic AI.

"Hey, little glowy dude, you ok?"

"_No_," Roland whispered. "_God, it _hurts_!_"

"What hurts?" Grif didn't know what to do. He wasn't a science whiz, like Simmons, and he didn't know squat about AI... beyond the fact that they could be seriously aggravating or dangerous, depending on where you were in their standings. Roland's hologram hesitantly pushed itself into an upright position, holding his head.

"_I had a fragment aboard the _Infinity..." Roland explained. "_Someone hacked her and forcibly destroyed my fragment. I imagine it felt like being run over by a bus._"

"I've never been run over by a bus, but Scorpion treads hurt like hell," Grif shrugged. "Sucks. What's that mean for the _Infinity_?"

"_It might be destroyed,_" Roland was surprised by his own cynicism and the emotion in his voice.

"That'd suck," Grif muttered, removing his helmet to scratch at messy, dark curls. "Hey, you're not gonna split up into a bunch of fragments, right?"

"_What?_"

"Uh... go rampant?"

"_Probably not. I'm only a few years old,_" Roland shrugged. "_And I'm not that over-stressed._"

"What? AI can stress themselves to rampancy?"

"_Rampancy happens when an AI's programming breaks down,_" Roland said. "_They think themselves to insanity, then death._"

"Like... dementia for robots."

"_Not really..__._"

"Well, too bad. Because that makes more sense than 'think themselves to death.'"

"_If that's what works for you, fine..._" Roland shrugged. "_I'll see if I can get in contact with Sanctuary and the other teams,_" Roland told Grif, who nodded, understanding that the conversation was over. Grif sat back in the pilot's chair, fishing a magazine out from under it while he left the AI to his work. "_Gypsy to Sierra Team, come in._"

"_Gypsy, this is Sierra Alpha_," Siobhan's voice was a welcome sound. Although, Roland momentarily wished he'd specifically aimed for Kelly. "_Status on your end?_"

"_Landed soft as a feather, Sierra-Alpha. Sit rep?_"

"_Got our arses handed to us by a giant metal bastard. Matter-of-fact, he looked a wee bit like a Spartan. Fought like one. I'm thinkin' Jack's managed to put the suit together with his yellow scrap metal off specs he got from John or Fred's. Also, we got word from Sanctuary. The _Infinity's_ been brought down. Dunno how Jack did it, but my guess is the hunches about forerunner shite are true an' he's found something that works on big ships._"

"_And other than finding the Hyperion-Spartan_?"

"_Roland and DeMarco were picked up by one of their bots. Sending you a pic of the damn thing._"

"_Hyperion classifications call that a 'Constructor,'"_ Roland told her. "_If you tail it, watch out. Apparently they can digistruct bots and turrets._"

"_We're aware of that._"

"_Out air,_" Roland huffed, closing the ECHO link. His hologram sat down on the projector, head in hands. "_Why is Jack so _good_?" _

"Huh?" Grif looked over, eyebrow raised.

"_How is Jack so good? He captured the UNSC's finest—fine, they were outgunned. It happens, even to Spartans. But then he's got ships that can compete with the UNSC's biggest, best starship and knock it planetside like a piñata. If it were just ships that could combat and destroy the_ Infinity_ and her strident frigates, that'd make sense. But he grounded her. Why ground her when you can blow her up?_"

"Maybe he wants the ship somewhat in one piece," Grif shrugged. "I mean, if I had Jack's ego, just the two best soldiers wouldn't be enough. I'd want to conquer _all_ of the UNSC's best accomplishments. They beat the Covenant, right? That means they're top dog in the galaxy, at least. So, take out their trophies. One, it destroys morale and two, it proves just how boss I'd be. Maybe put him in position for a full take-over, government and all."

"_Makes more sense than anything else going on here,_" Roland shrugged.

"I know, right? Most of the time, no one gives me credit for my brilliance."

(V)

PANDORA  
_The Dust  
_24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
"That's it, right?" Mal asked before licking at a cut he'd managed to gain on the back of his hand. Gaige wiped her brow with the back of her hand and shouldered her rifle. She shrugged and handed him a bandage. Mal smoothed the bandage onto his wound and glanced over at Salvador, who looked to be in his element. Unharmed and glowing with pride from the recent slayings, the short Pandoran marine whistled as he strutted back up to Ellie's garage.

"Señorita! Is that it?" he asked and immediately wished he hadn't walked into her garage. Ellie was bent low, working on the engine of a car. Salvador felt like he was looking out the window of the observation deck on the _Queen's Bishop_ again... at Pandora. Salvador's rifle clattered to the floor. Hastily, he turned his back on Ellie and picked it up.

"Naw, I got one last thing for y'all to do," she said, turning around. "See, I get kinda bored just sittin' up in m'shop, so I was wonderin' if y'all wouldn't mind throwin' some kindlin' on this here fire of a feud the Hodunks and Zafords have a' goin' on."

"What'd we have to do?" Mal asked.

"Well, first y'all'll go on out to the Hodunk camp and destroy the planet's third largest tire. Put this here shamrock thing on it," Ellie said, producing a shamrock-shaped piece of metal from between her breasts. Mal hesitantly took it from her, wishing Salvador had moved first.

(V)

PANDORA  
_Trainwreck Tundra  
Tundra "Express"  
_24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
Lasky lifted his head, feeling wet on the side of his face. He raised a hand, touching his cheek gingerly. He found the laceration quickly, a shallow scrape across his cheekbone. He pushed himself into a sitting position and looked around. Through the darkness, he could make out Palmer's armored form moving towards him. She hauled the captain to his feet as some of the other bridge crew shifted.

"Glad I didn't listen to you..." Lasky grumbled.

"You were still out for a few minutes. How do you feel?"

"Like shit. How many hands did we loose?"

"Not sure," Palmer replied. "It was rough, but fairly gentle, as far as crash-landings go. I'd be surprised if anyone was actually dead."

"More insane miracles have happened before," Lasky muttered.

"Tom?"

Lasky looked past Palmer at the soft spoken speaker. Linda helped a lieutenant up and moved closer to Lasky.

"Are you alright, sir?"

"Fine," Lasky said. "Wasn't as much of a nap as I needed, but hey..." he shrugged. Linda offered a timid smile. "Petty officer, take a team and reconnoiter the area. If you can get a hold of the locals, radio back on whichever frequency works."

"Yes, sir," Linda saluted and left with the dismissal. Lasky flexed his hand, feeling a little pain, probably from the fall and looked around the bridge.

"Ensign, how in Sam Hell did we crash?"

(V)

PANDORA  
_Trainwreck Tundra  
Tundra "Express"  
_24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
Mordecai woke up on the floor of his bedroom, his half-empty bottle of rakk ale smashed on the floor beside him, the neck of it still in his grip.

"What the hell...?" he groaned as he shifted into an upright position, feeling the room spinning a little. Bloodwing glanced at him from under her wing and cawed softly, as if telling him she wanted to sleep longer. "Was that an earthquake?"

_Sqwa..._

"It was a hell of a lot harder than the drilling," Mordecai grumbled, staggering to the balcony. He peered out across Trainwreck Tundra and was stunned and amazed to see the cause of the quake wasn't any of his guesses, but something a hell of a lot more interesting. "Shit... Blood, it was a crash."

_Caw...?_

"A freakin' space ship! Looks... UNSC," Mordecai muttered, remembering his days in the mandatory four years of service. He hadn't been in long enough to be an ODST, even though the thought had crossed his mind. He'd been stationed aboard the _Pillar of Autumn, _and so he'd just done the four years, complaining his way through it (sometimes, on Pandora, though, he did almost wish he could be relaxing in his tower, blowing the methane tanks off Grunts—that and he missed his spotter; a buxom specialist named Joannes). But that had been over twenty years before. And this ship was a hell of a lot bigger. _Miles_ bigger. And realizing it was probably the most state-of-the-art vessel the UNSC had to offer only dropped the bottom straight out of Mordecai's stomach. "Son of a bitch..."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Trainwreck Tundra  
Tundra "Express"  
_24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
Krieg fell flat in a snow drift, panting heavily as the other Spartans stumbled to a stop around him.

"How in the _hell_...?" Hoya huffed, glancing at Krieg.

"We weren't running that fast," Kelly shrugged.

"But still..." Thorne swiped a bead of sweat off his eyebrow. "Hoya's right. How the hell did he keep up with us?"

"Slag experimentation," Zero said. They all looked at him. He shrugged.

"Well, there she is..." Grant nodded at the hulking shape not too far ahead.

"She looks pretty intact," Siobhan noted.

"EMP?" Madsen suggested.

"No, whatever it was Jack used it was meant to keep her whole," Siobhan said. "An' I don't like that."

"What's the problem?" Hoya asked.

"He wanted to keep her intact," Siobhan said. "I'm gettin' the feelin' our visitor was probably either John or Fred in high-tech Hyperion armor, probably with neural interfaces that allowed Jack to force 'im to attack us. They'd be trophies of his. An' he wants to keep the _Infinity_ intact for the same reason."

"A trophy?"

"And gold mine," Kelly said. "It's full of Forerunner tech."

"Maybe how Jack got it to land so smoothly," Thorne said. Siobhan gave him a look that demanded elaboration. "While we were off Requiem, we got caught with a Forerunner anchor of some kind. Now, I imagine if they have something like that, they might have something to reel in whatever it was they anchored. Maybe Jack used that."

"Seems logical," Siobhan said. She glanced warily at the ground.

"If that's the case, I've got some digging to do," Naomi joked, unslinging her rifle. "After we check to see who's alive."

"_Hey, you people down there_," a voice came over their ECHOs, gruff and male. "_You here to loot or investigate that ship? Cuz if you're here to loot it, I'm gonna have to ask you to politely fuck the hell off."_

"We're here to investigate," Siobhan said. "You are?"

"_Name's Mordecai. I work with the Raiders. You?_"

"Chief Petty Officer Siobhan-086," Siobhan replied.

"_Well, now... Check that out_," Mordecai whistled. "_I'm guessing you're reconning?"_

"No, we're investigating, like you said," Thorne replied. "Your lady friend sent us. The _lil_ one."

"_Oh, riiiight_," Mordecai said. "_Yeah, you just sit tight. I'll be right down._"

"And so the birdman descends," Krieg grumbled. They all looked at him.

"Birdman?" Naomi cocked her head to the side.

"He has a pet bird," Thorne said. "Krieg, how'd you know that?"

Krieg shrugged and squatted back down into the snow, rolling together a few balls to form a small snowman. It was times like this when they forgot he was a psychotic killing machine just set to stand-by for the moment. Kelly smiled, almost fondly... Until he smashed the snowman with his fist, cackling evilly under his breath.

(V)

PANDORA  
_Southpaw Electrical  
Three Horns Valley  
_24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
Axton paused, tensing slightly. Carolina paused and glanced at him, then looked around. Paranoid, Axton twitched to the left, bringing his rifle around.

"Easy there, old sport," a gruff, English accent greeted him. Wyoming, in plain ONI Spec Ops armor, pushed the rifle to the side. "How's your side, York?"

"Healed up nicely, thanks. Scored above and beyond in all categories on my last PT test," Axton replied.

"Yes, of course you did," Wyoming smiled cheerfully. "Wash, Carolina, how are the two of you? Oh, and North! You look splendid!"

"Wyoming?" Tucker hissed, fingers curling around his sword.

"Now, now, Tucker, no need for that," Wyoming said, chuckling softly. "I assure you, I mean absolutely no harm."

"Hey, what are you doing here?"

"ONI stuff, terribly secret, I'm afraid," Wyoming replied. "And would you _kindly_ move your rifle from its current mark?"

Tucker realized that he'd just angled his barrel down slightly, but not enough. The laser sight had put a small red dot on Wyoming's groin.

"Yes, Agent Banner and I are conducting an ONI operation," Wyoming continued. "Mick, do relax," he seemed to be speaking into the comms. The sound of boots hitting the floor caused them to glance in the other direction. Tucker was the only one to speak.

"You're shitting me."

(V)

PANDORA  
_The Highlands  
Overlook-Outside the Holy Spirits Pub  
_24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
"Seems like a waste," Mal said, glancing down at the plastic explosives in his hand, then back up at the huge still full of beer. "All that beer..."

"Maybe we should siphon off some, first, sir," Salvador suggested. Mal smirked.

"I love the way you think, Marine," Mal snickered.

Gaige came back from retrieving some of the Shivers medicine for the residents of Overlook to find Mal and Salvador sitting on barrels with their canteens emptied out in their laps, laughing about something.

"An' then the bloody fool just jumps, seven feet in the air, howling!" Mal seemed to be finishing off a story, which was making Salvador laugh so hard he hiccuped.

"Dios mio," Salvador laughed. "One last canteen full?"

"Sounds good," Mal said. They started for the still when Gaige cleared her throat loudly.

"You two had another job to do!" she reminded them.

"Right, explosives," Salvador said. They quickly patched the bombs in and started shifting the beer. They managed to load the beer into their pick-up style technical and lit the explosives. They got just far enough away, leaving the Hodunk hood ornaments behind with the exploded still of beer.

"Still seems like a waste," Mal frowned. Salvador crossed himself, looking in the direction of the still.

"Such a pity, to have died so young... and so full of beer."

"Cheers to that, mate."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Hyperion Railway  
_24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
Wilhelm screamed in pain, smashing around the room as Dr. Halsey and Jul 'Mdama scrambled out of his way. They ducked out of the train car and glanced around.

"It seems you did not think the plan through," Jul chided Dr. Halsey as they stood there, the wind whipping at their clothing.

"Oh, do shut up," Halsey scolded back. "At least I thought us out of that. What did you do? Gawk?"

"Were I not handcuffed to you..."

"You still wouldn't kill me," Halsey rolled her eyes. "I think you've grown fond of me."

It was true. While Jul hated humanity in its entirety, he and the old doctor had some kind of twisted camaraderie they'd built up over the three years of imprisonment at Jack's hands. And not only that, but if there was one thing that could bind enemies together, it was bigger, badder enemy that they hated many times more. Jul cocked his head to the side, hearing Wilhelm crashing out of the room, shouting for them.

"Only one thing for it, Halsey," Jul grated. He hated the cold. But he hated the idea of dying shamed as he was, cuffed to the human doctor, at the "hands" of _robots_ working for that filth, Jack.

"Do be careful with me, Jul," Halsey said, having clearly figured his plan out. "I'm very fragile."

"Were it so easy," Jul grumbled and scooped her up, leaping from the train, down into the snow below.

(V)

PANDORA  
_The UNSC _Queen's Bishop_  
Planetary Orbit_  
24.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
_"See, this is the problem with you heroes! You don't stop! You just keep coming and coming and coming... And it gets a little aggravating, y'know? If you just laid down and _died_ it would make everyone's problems just pfft! But nooo, you gotta be freakin' _heroes_ about it..._"

Rook felt the tick behind his eye. It surfaced every so often when he was irritated or angry. At this point, it was both. He just fixed his collar and silently thanked whatever deity presided over their present situation that the_ Queen_ hadn't been refitted with Forerunner tech just yet.

"Unfortunately," Rook sometimes liked the surprise people displayed at his impossible calm tone. "It's a pain to be the hero, at time, but someone has to do it."

"_Step aside and let _me_ do it!_" Jack snapped. "_Or just stand the hell down. I don't care, just get out of my face!_"

"I'm afraid I can't do that," Rook replied. "It's an honor thing. You wouldn't understand."

* * *

Meh, it's still about a thousand words short. I just... didn't have much to say this time 'round. I think I need to play up another character to this point. Take a gander at the ol' story line again.

Did I not promise Mordecai? :) Uh... Yeah, so... I guess Tina's comin' in the next chapter... And I've been asked for Maine... so he might be, also. Meh, anyone else y'all wanna see? People from RvB? Halo? Borderlands? Torgue? Osman? More Claptrap? Hows about Locus and Felix? Eh? Eh? REVIEW AND TELL ME! And feel free to use excessive CAPITALIZATION! BECAUSE THAT IS AWESOME. JUST LIKE REVIEWS!


	8. La Piscine Du Mort

Claptrap: Hello, Traveler! This is NOT a PSA, but it IS a deviation from the story line! Enjoy! :D

Uh... What Claptrap said... Like the chapter coming out next, this is kinda filler. So... uh... yeah. Enjoy?

The title means "The Pool of Death" in French. It's a Deadpool joke. :3

* * *

Maine.

That's what he used to be called.

That's what the man with the mustache used to call him, anyway.

He could _just_ remember that the man with the mustache used to be called "Wyoming."

Apparently, though, the man's name was Lieutenant Reginald Baker and _his_ name was Mick Banner.

"Mick, I understand it's probably difficult for you..." Wyoming trailed off when he saw the understanding in his eyes. He smiled fondly. The mustache had been trimmed much shorter and much neater. He looked much less... intimidating than he used to and looked far more personable. Best of all he understood that Mick got it.

V

Why are we here...?

Because we're on a mission.

Doing what?

Trying to find some people.

Then what?

And once we do, we'll monitor them.

What if we don't like what we see?

Well... Baker will think of something.

(V)

A lick of pain surging through his body from his lower back, where the prod connected with pinkened, smarting skin.

_Why...?!  
_

He'd never thought that way before. Even as a child 'why me' was never a thought that crossed his mind. Not that he could remember anyway. He twitched, struggling away from the tormentor.

In the past few weeks, thoughts had been torn from him and thought processes had been broken down to selfish, terrified, animal needs.

Would there be time to lick wounds and sleep?

How long would the pain go on?

Would there be food?

He should've been glad that the why was coming into his mind, now, pushing past the one-word answer questions clogging his thoughts. But before he could answer or think to elaborate, bestial twitches overtook the human questioning thoughts.

V

It wore on and on until there was nothing left.

He was feral, wild and hungry and terrified. All that was left now was raw, throbbing hurt, like all his skin had been torn back and the bare muscle was left in the open. He didn't whimper or moan anymore. It was just snarling and snapping of teeth. They'd turned him wild with torture. His strength was diminished slightly form the abuse and the starvation, but once he had something that caused him to turn his nose in its direction, it was dead.

And that's what Jack wanted. A wild, hunting dog.

Once he was taken out to be tried as a big, humanoid bloodhound.

Once.

They were hunting after a woman. They'd shown him her picture every day for the last month, presenting him with one of those targets to tear into, training him that this woman was to be slaughtered, if possible. Her throat was to be ripped out, her heart... They let him off the leash, let him run wild. All he'd had to do was listen to that little voice in his head, whispering to act like he'd caught the scent.

_Pretend you got the trail. Do it._

He was off, tearing into the terrain, snarling and growling as he ran. Then it was like someone else had taken over. He climbed quickly, cowering in the shadows of the stone, clutching two projectiles. The first one hit its mark easily, bloodying the Hyperion soldier's face, the blood pierced by a broken shard of nose and brow. The second broke the wrist of the second guard. He sprang down, coiling a muscled arm around the soldier's throat. A sharp jerk, hand pushing down on the man's shoulders and arm up on his jaw, broke the man's spine. He dropped the corpse and picked up the rifles, prowling back to the main group. Three shots, three dead.

_We're free._

* * *

Above the (V) is Maine, below the (V) is Krieg, to avoid confusion.

Uh, I'm posting this this afternoon because I've hit a block on the next chapter. You'll get that chapter Thursday. Don't get too pissy—it's just filler with some big surprises (well, like two) and possibly Tiny Tina, but not a lot of plot movement... meh. Anywho, toodles!

OH, YEAH, OH! HEY, did everyone see that leaked footage of Ryan Reynolds as Deadpool!? HOLY SHIT. THAT WAS INCREDIBLE. I'll probably have Krieg quote it here or there. "Crime is a Disease! And I'm the CURE! Well, actually I'm more of a topical ointment that relieves swelling and itch. Hi, Tom!"~ Deadpool.


	9. Chapter 7

Claptrap: Helloooo traveler! New Chapters of _Krieg_ are available right here! Oh, and Anarkyrie would like to tell you all that no, she does not own Halo or Borderlands or RvB!

Uh, warning... this chapter is like totally all filler & shiz... I'm SO sorry about how short it is! I'll be honest, it's been a long time since I played anything but DLC for Borderlands 2... I don't remember this area of the story line too well and I only missed saving Roland on my first time through (solo as level 12 Zer0... not meant to be victorious!) and I don't really remember much about Tiny Tina... D: so... bare with me? I know I said I was gonna delay the release of this one, but I'm so annoyed with it, I don't want to... SO, A DAY EARLY! YAAAAAY! Next week is probably still gonna be on Wednesday. :D

* * *

CHAPTER SIX

PANDORA  
_Trainwreck Tundra  
The UNSC _Infinity  
24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
Tom shivered. It was more of just a muscle spasm than an actual shiver—he wasn't cold. But it sent a roll of feeling down his spine to see the _Infinity_ grounded like it was, from this angle. From the torn dirt already starting to frost over in the setting sun as they set up their temporary structures outside the monolith of technological uselessness. Warthogs had been retrieved, Pelicans coaxed back to life, those injured laid out in a half-heated medical tent as the rest of the troops worked to set theirs up. The Spartans in armor had been ordered to shift the warthogs and move crates too difficult to move without the powered-down vehicles. Once the vehicle situation had been sorted and they'd shifted enough supplies out, all those armored up were put on guard duty while the remainder were told to sit tight in their half-heated tents with the rest of the soldiers. There wasn't much they could do in the encroaching cold and Spartans weren't immune to frost bite.

Tom saw a Marine's breath whisp as it rushed from the man's mouth as he moved for his tent, with his battle buddies, rolling like fog from dry ice from how Tom saw it. Then something else caught his eye. Tom drew his pistol, pointing it in the direction of the shadow, shifting ever so slightly, creeping forward. It took shape into the form of a man, shirtless save for part of a red breastplate and a few bandages on his chest and arms. He wore a mask and prison orange trousers, held up by a battered old belt. Tom noted other eyes following the draw of his pistol.

"Spartan?"

"Ma'am, we've got company," he told Linda. She glanced in the direction he was looking and lifted her rifle.

"They're friendlies," she told him, seeing the forms behind the masked man melt from the shadows. Nine approaching people, including the masked man and eight of them looked to be Spartan. One of them was Kelly. "That's Kelly's team."

Tom lowered his pistol, sliding it onto the magnetic strip on his thigh.

"Ma'am," Tom greeted Kelly.

"I leave for a few days and he destroys the ship," Kelly sighed. "Linda, I thought I asked you to look after Lasky for me."

"I did," Linda said. "But I couldn't stop whatever it was Jack shot at us."

Kelly shrugged. A subtle shift in Krieg's stance drew attention. They followed his gaze and Kelly realized it had to have just been pure instinct on his part. There was no way he could see the figures emerging from the darkness. A tall, hulking, all-too-familiar figure strode with a smaller, human one beside it. The Sangheili held one hand up, a gesture of peace, as he approached. The other figure was hugging close to his side, for want of warmth, Kelly surmised, at first, then noted the cuffs holding them to the other.

"That's..." Mark trailed off. He didn't need to finish the sentence.

"Freeze!" a Spartan IV yelled past them. Lieutenant Sanchez strode forward, hand on pistol. "Release the human!"

"I cannot," the Sangheili called back. "She may yet freeze and we are chained together!" As if to emphasize his point, he lifted his other hand from around her, forcing her to twist her arm up uncomfortably. His wrist was manacled to hers. "We seek sanctuary!"

"You're a few miles off, buddy," Madsen muttered under his breath. He shouldered his sniper rifle. Siobhan took a few steps towards the Sangheili.

"Jul 'Mdama, yes?"

"Yes," the Elite confirmed. "An escaped captive of Handsome Jack's."

"He'll be looking for you two, then," Siobhan said. She glanced at Sanchez. "Sir?"

"We can't offer you comfort," Sanchez said.

"As I understand, there is an old human saying," Jul 'Mdama began. "The enemy of my enemy is my friend. Perhaps I can put aside my loathing of the humans for a moment, on those grounds."

"You'll have to talk to the captain," Sanchez said. "And I'll have to talk to the Commander before you can do that. You'll have to wait right there, hinge-head."

There was a long, awkward silence. The kind Spartans were used to. Jul sat with Dr. Halsey, one arm looped around her shoulders to conserve the tiny ball of heat her side on his kept between them. Squatting in the snow made it harder to keep. But one of the female Spartans, a particularly small one, strode over with a woolen blanket for each of them.

"Thank you, Lucy," Dr. Halsey said. The Spartan hesitated, like she was surprised Dr. Halsey had remembered her name and quickly went back to her post, catching up to her comrades easily.

Meanwhile, in Captain Lasky's tent, Siobhan was wishing she'd gotten in touch with Lilith sooner, not that there was much that could've been done from Sanctuary.

"We're off our game, here, sir," Siobhan admitted freely to Lasky, a little embarrassed.

"Yeah, I noticed," Lasky frowned. "Me too."

"How many people did you loose in the crash, sir?"

"Quite a few. We had a few soldiers in medical on life support..." Lasky looked down at the fold-away table serving as a desk. "Roland?"

"The AI, sir?"

"No, the guy my people were supposed to rendezvous with at Sanctuary," Lasky shook his head.

"Jack has him, sir," Siobhan said. She glanced over her shoulder, at Mordecai, who was feeding his bird a strip of dried meat.

"Mordecai?" Lasky glanced at Mordecai.

"Jack's probably had Roland taken to the 'Friendship Gulag'," Mordecai said. "Apparently one of the Spartan guys was also taken with him."

"DeMarco, sir."

"He better not be dead," Lasky frowned. "I actually _liked_ DeMarco."

"There's a distinct possibility you're gonna be pissed," Mordecai shrugged. "If Jack can't get what he wants out of DeMarco, he might be killed."

"None of this makes sense," Lasky grumbled. "How was Jack able to take us out of the sky? Who is this sonovabitch that nearly destroyed, what, six Spartans _at_ _once_?"

"Amigo," Mordecai began with a chuckle. "This is Pandora. People that try to make sense of things here usually end up dead in some kind of embarrassing way."

"Thanks for the tip."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Trainwreck Tundra  
The UNSC _Infinity  
25.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
Halsey rubbed her wrist. She could still feel the icy metal ring around it. Lasky hesitated.

"How're you feeling, Doc?" he asked. She shrugged.

"I've been better, Captain," Dr. Halsey admitted. "I don't mean to overstep, but Jul could do with some warmth. His species is colder-blooded than ours and he's been in the snow for quite some time. I owe him a lot and I'd rather he didn't die."

"I'll do what I can," Lasky shrugged. "What can you tell me about Jack?"

"What do you want to know?" Halsey replied. "I hate the man and would _love_ to be the person to put the knife in his eye, but I understand there's a long line ahead of me."

"Oh, yeah, there is," Lasky nodded. "Lots of people want Jack dead."

"Tell me, have any of your troops encountered a tall, yellow-armored Spartan-like soldier?" Halsey asked. Lasky hesitated.

"Why do you want to know?"

"I could tell you who that was."

"Who?"

"It was John," Halsey said.

"Shit," Lasky swore, grasping at the table behind him for support. The news made him a little dizzy and a little nauseated. "He killed one of the Spartan IV's and tried to kill Kelly and her team."

"I'll be honest, I'm not sure what _else_ there is, but Jack's been using a neural corrector and manipulator on him so long, I don't know how much of him is left."

"How do you know?" Lasky asked.

"He used a neural manipulator on me, too," Halsey said. "Made me cut John up and stuff him full of cybernetics."

"Jesus H Christ..." Lasky felt the nausea hit him a little harder and sank back against the table. It was a personal feeling of dread. John was one of his closest friends, as odd as the idea of that was. "Don't tell Kelly."

"I won't," Halsey said. "It would crush her. And impede her from stopping him. I don't think it's possible to reason with him or bring him back to our side anymore."

"Best he's killed, then," Lasky agreed.

(V)

Angel was afraid to go near him, even though it was only in hologram.

"Easy," she tried to soothe. All she got in response was a snarl and a thrown attendant, the man screaming as he flew through the holographic woman.

"Hurts," he growled. "Jack promised there'd be no more pain."

"Jack only meant from the cybernetics," Angel explained. "He can't help heartache."

"Cut it out."

"You need it."

"Mechanical one."

"It doesn't work that easily," Angel frowned. "It's not your actual heart, it's in your brain. We tried to get rid of most of the emotion centers, but you still need pieces of it to work properly."

"Not working right."

"There's nothing we can do about it," Angel said. "Dr. Halsey is—"

At that point, it all turned to static for him. In his mind, things worked rather simply. Objective?—complete objective. Weapon?—fire. But Halsey... Halsey was a snag: something he didn't have the equipment to handle. Something was fighting inside his head... "Halsey..." he murmured, feeling that spike of pain behind his eye again. He pawed at his eye socket, fingernails scraping harmlessly against metallic plating. The robotic eye whirred as it processed the movement of Angel's lips and the gentle gestures her hologram made.

He had to go out and find this Halsey woman.

Make her make him understand.

(V)

PANDORA  
_The UNSC _Lady Anne's Roses  
_Planetary Orbit_  
25.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Commander Nick Jensen used to have motion sickness.

He'd gotten over it sometime in the middle of his third year of serving in the UNMC, when he'd been forced to jump out of flaming pelican and was caught, maybe a foot off the ground by a Spartan II Master Chief Petty Officer 001, or, as you, dear reader, know him: then-NCO Charles Rook. Needless to say, Jensen was ready and willing to fight and die for the man who saved his life (more than once) years prior and had been _so_ eager to command one of the _Queen's_ strident frigates.

Except that right at that moment, his motion sickness took its chance to return.

Once the bile had been choked back down and the discomfort of half-digested food and acid-tinged coffee had been swallowed once again, Jensen attempted speech. "Brilliant maneuver, Sulu!" Jensen praised his pilot.

"Th-thank you, sir!" Lieutenant Kouichi Sulu hadn't known entirely where that had come from, but was glad it had. It had been a hell of a lot less nerve-wracking to perform with a Longsword, he recalled.

_"Hey, what's the idea, Jensen?! Trying to break Rook's ship?_" Dante's hologram appeared on the pedestal beside the _Lady Anne's_ own avatar, a little pixie woman fond of calling herself Peaseblossom.

"It's _my_ ship, Dante," Jensen fired back. "And no, I'm not. I'm trying to _keep_ it from getting broken."

"_Good job. As far as I can tell, everything's perfect here,_" Dante glanced at Peaseblossom. "_Or did I miss something, darlin'?"_

"_No, sir, everything's ship shape._" Now that was something curious. An AI calling another AI 'sir'... Jensen supposed it was because the _Queen_ was the main vessel, thusly making Dante out-rank the frigates' shipboard AI, collectively called the Four Handmaidens or the Queen's Maids by the crews.

"Any word from the _Infinity_?" Jensen asked.

"_Well, no_," Dante shrugged. "_Rook just ordered me to check in on all the ships personally. And since I like you, I felt like chatting a little._"

"That's dandy," Jensen frowned. "_No_ word on the _Infinity?_"

"_From what I could see, she crashed pretty gently._ _She's intact. As for the crew, I have no idea._"

"...How's Charlie?"

"_Tired._"

"We all are," Jensen sighed. "It would be a hell of a lot easier if these guys fought like Covvies," Jensen muttered. "At least we finally figured out how to do that right."

"_They're actually quite predictable. I sorted it out not too long ago_," Dante said. "_Dollface, I'm giving you my solutions._"

"_This is excellent, sir. I'm surprised we couldn't figure this out sooner,_" Peaseblossom seemed genuinely pleased by whatever it was Dante had given her.

"_Later, sweetie_," his avatar winked and vanished. Peaseblossom turned.

"_Lieutenant Sulu, I've overlaid one of the possible flight paths. Mr. Paris, I have suggested firing solutions..._"

(V)

PANDORA  
_The UNSC _Queen's Bishop  
_Planetary Orbit_  
25.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Captain Rook truly enjoyed untangling problems, fixing them in his head and putting the plans they unfurled to work, like traveling the map he'd just laid out. But this battlefield, unfolded and laid flat before him, brought memories long-since stored away in his mind to life, breathing into ghosts.

That was always one hell of a _snag_.

_Kurt laughing and covered in mud as he and John struggled up the side of the embankment. A hand came down and the two boys looked up. Charles grinned down at them, lifting his booted foot, Kurt's fingers gripping across the top of it. A thrust of his heel sent both boys back down the embankment, tumbling in the dirt. He saw the glint of surprise in both their eyes as he drew his rifle._

_It had been a long fight and Charles hated loosing._

Rook shook his head, trying to clear away the thoughts. John was dead. Kurt was dead. Their files might've said MIA. Kelly might've been searching for John down on Pandora, but he wasn't MIA. Rook was sure he was _K_IA.

It was a bet he would've prayed he'd loose, if he prayed.

* * *

Damn, that was short. Barely cleared 2.5K words... I'll try to make the next one longer... I just don't have it.

Um, yes, the two crewmen on the _Lady Anne's Roses_ are based off _Star Trek_ characters. Problem? No? Good.

Hey, how does this idea strike you: Avengers x Halo x Borderlands x Devil May Cry x Bioshock crossover? yes? no? Blown mind (jk)?


	10. Chapter 8

Claptrap: Helloooo traveler! New Chapters of _Krieg_ are available right here!

Lilith: Anarkyrie doesn't own any recognizable characters or whatever. She's not 2K or 343, so...

Krieg: ... numbers make my brain hurt.

Lilith: ...what did that have to do with anything...?

* * *

CHAPTER EIGHT

PANDORA  
_Trainwreck Tundra  
The UNSC _Infinity  
24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
"So this Wilhelm guy is going to be on a hunt for Dr. Halsey and Jul 'Mdama?" Thorne summed up. Lasky nodded.

"Just about. Mordecai, you know the area the best?"

"Scenery's changed a little," Mordecai joked in poor taste, watching it fall flat on a few of the Spartans and accepting the frowny-emotocon from Zero. "Ok, since he's not here yet, he probably stopped the train and searched wherever it was you two stepped off at," he directed his attention to Halsey and Jul. "Wilhelm's pretty tough—he was able to beat all four of us back in the day..."

"No offense, but not one of you is a Spartan," Lasky said.

"No, but Brick's damn close and Lilith's a siren," Mordecai said. "I've seen Spartans in action and I've seen _Brick_ in action. He can compete."

"We'll see," Halsey frowned. Mordecai raised an eyebrow.

"Anyway, like I said. Wilhelm's tough... but there's what, nine of you? He won't be much of a problem, I think. You'll need explosives."

"No problem," Lasky said.

"I'm wondering how much damage a good railgun blast would do to this Wilhelm guy," Hoya said. Mordecai shrugged.

"My best S&S, Lilith's Hellfire, Roland's Guardian and Brick's Blast Hammer didn't do shit, so here's hoping UNSC weapons are better."

"It's not the gun, my friend, it's who's behind it," Madsen smirked. Mordecai scowled.

"Wilhelm's armor has been modified in accordance with what Jack stripped from ours," Jul informed them. "He relies heavily on automaton combat aid. Also his vision is slightly impaired. The optics of his human eye have been damaged."

"Which side?" Siobhan asked.

"Right."

"Good," Siobhan said. "We'll set charges, blow the rail, eliminate any interference and take Wilhelm down. Kelly? Mind reprising your role from trainin'?"

"Yeah, how's about it, _Bunny_?" Madsen smirked, earning a glare from the older female Spartan. But Kelly understood. It _was_ her fault... she'd told them the story about being nicknamed 'Rabit' back in training for her ability to move so quickly and avoid actual trouble, even in the thick of it.

Just then, the tent flap opened and a man with a mustache stepped in, followed by Axton.

"Apologies, sir," the man saluted.

"As you were," Lasky replied. "What can I do for you?"

"As it were, sir, it's a rather sensitive matter. You see, I was dispatched on a separate mission, but it seems we've no choice but to coordinate," the man said. Lasky nodded.

"Majestic, please escort Dr. Halsey and Mr. 'Mdama to their quarters. Chief, see that your team gets the rest they deserve and are outfitted appropriately."

"Aye sir," Siobhan and Thorne chorused, departing the tent. Mordecai followed them out, shoulder-to-shoulder with Axton. That left the mustached man with Lasky.

"So... the sensitive matter?" Lasky inclined his head. The man hesitated.

"Sir, I'm afraid I've been rude. I'm Lieutenant Reginald Baker, ONI Special Ops Officer," Wyoming introduced himself. "I'm afraid this conversation may get uncomfortable..."

(V)

Gaige pulled a face.

"You two are hopeless with women," she teased Mal and Salvador as they sat at the cold plastic table. But she finished the meal anyway, not quite as quickly as Mal and Salvador packed it away, though.

"Trick is to start swallowing before it's even in your mouth," Mal said.

"That's what she said," Axton greeted the two marines. He smiled at Gaige. "Not you, sweetie. Someone else."

"I'm not a kid, Axton. I know that joke. It's been around for centuries."

Zero strode over and sat down with them. A few of the other Marines stole confused looks at him, which he ignored. "Axton, you and I are taking Mal, Salvador, Madsen and Gaige on a quick little trip..."

"For what?" Gaige asked.

"Mordecai asked us to duck in on a friend. Said she might help us out with Wilhelm," Zero shrugged, standing up. "Fifteen mikes."

"Well, you heard 'im," Mal said, standing up. "C'mon."

"But I just sat down..." Gaige frowned.

"We need to teach you how to combat eat," Salvador said. "You can choke something down on the way."

"Yeah, I have a few ration bars," Axton smirked.

"Why...?" Salvador pulled a face.

"Well, Lasky said we should stock up on ammunition, didn't he?" Mal snickered.

"Are ration bars really that bad?" Gaige asked.

"Put it this way, sweetheart," Mal began. "Even Spartan II's complain about them."

"Oh..."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Trainwreck Tundra_  
_Tina's Place_  
24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
"Tina?"

Axton's voice echoed on the walls as they strode into the caverns. Gaige stayed close to him and Mal as they walked. According to Mordecai, Tina was a little weird. On Pandora, that could mean anything.

"_All around the skag-tus plant, the stalker chased the bandit! The stalker thought 'twas all in fun!_" sang an eerily cheerful voice. "_Pop goes the bandit!_" There was an explosion and the Vault Hunters moved forward quickly.

"Tina?" Madsen raised an eyebrow when they came upon a young blonde-haired girl in a dirty pink dress, orange pants with a psycho mask as a hat.

"Ooh! Hey, hey, hey, whazzup!" Standing beside the pile of organs, bone and flesh, she was beaming from ear to ear, with large, wild blue eyes. She looked up at Madsen first. "Daaamn, girl! Whatchu all dressed up like that fo? Gonna go grab yo shield and kick some Loki ass?"

"Uh, hi, are you Tina?" Axton asked.

"Fo sho!" the girl chirped. "You is lookin' at the one and only Lady Tina of Blowupyafaceheim!"

"That's a place?" Salvador raised an eyebrow.

Zero felt a twitch behind his eye coming on.

(V)

_I hate you._

_I hate you SO much. Why don't you ever do anything I ask you to, unless it involves killing?!_

_I guess you do hear me sometimes. I think you might remember things I can't... I think... And I just can't... get to them._

_Makes sense, anyway. Y'know... Since you seem so much more comfortable with Kelly than I can remember why you would be. _

_I wish I knew what you were thinking._

"THE VOICES SAID 'EMPTY, HOLLOW, THUD!'"

_...that didn't even make sense..._

Krieg sank his axe into a robot and spun away from it, barreling into another as the ODST troopers pushed forward, shredding the damaged Loader with automatic weapons fire. There were a great deal of advantages to having a crashed battleship and eight frigates at their disposal: the chiefest of which was manpower. Two platoons of Spartan IV's, six platoons of ODST's and two companies of marines tore through the train wreck site, trailing the Vault Hunters to Wilhelm's lit up position.

"Wilhelm! I advise you surrender! This is your one chance!" Siobhan called out.

In response, Wilhelm opened fire.

So all of the UNSC troops replied in kind.

"_Chief, this is Lieutenant Davis. See if Wilhelm's power core is still in one piece. We need a new one soon over here and he should run on a similar model._"

Siobhan hesitated, but approached the wreckage of blood, metal, bone and oil on the snow. She stooped, seeing the power core was destroyed, along with the rest of him.

"_Chief, this is Angel. Wilhelm had a spare core. Let me highlight it on your HUD for you._"

A diamond appeared on Siobhan's HUD. She moved for it and picked it up.

"_Oh, fucking bra-_vo_, Las_s. _You destroyed my robot and a bunch of my Loaders! And you've got a new power core! I'm _so_ doomed!_" Jack snorted, broadcasting to all radios in the area. "_Well, good for you. Slow clap and all that shit. Guess what, my little secret? You're gonna be fucked."_

"Hey, Jack! Shove it where the sun don't shine!" a marine yelled out.

"_You'll pay for that._"

(V)

PANDORA  
_Sanctuary  
Three Horns_  
24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
Most of the troops stayed behind with the _Infinity_, but about three companies—a number of the troops therein requested by Thorne, specifically—were transported in the barely fixed Pelicans, Falcons and Hornets. They were all camped out outside the walls of Sanctuary.

"_So, are five and three-quarters hundred troops gonna be enough?_" Lasky asked Lilith.

"Should be," Lilith said. "You've sent a great deal of Spartans."

"_Well, can't have the only safe place to go get destroyed, can we?_"

"No, I guess not."

Meanwhile, on the outskirts, Hoya was handing over the new power core to Lieutenant Davis.

"Sir, will this do?"

"Very nicely," Davis said, moving to plug the core in. Hoya turned to Kelly, heading down the steps.

"_Hey, Vault Hunters... Remember that secret?_"

"What now, Jack...?" Maya growled, earning a confused look from Hoya.

"_Angel? The one who suggested you pick up that power core...?_"

The dome shield over Sanctuary vanished.

"_She works for me._"

* * *

Oh snaps! Cliffhanger! :D

What's Wyoming up to!?

Uh... I can't write Tina. :( I just... I can't. It's sad, yes.

And also the chapter's shorter than I would've liked... -_o sorry.

So, for my next trick—I mean _fic_— what would y'all like to see (Cap, I know, I know... Starwars x Borderlands x Halo. I'm thinkin' on it)? What else is out there? Straight Halo? Straight Borderlands? Another crossover? Or a crossover with something else (I'm confident on Deus Ex: Human Revolution, Bioshock, Devil May Cry and Left 4 Dead as far as other games are concerned... (narrow, I know)? Or RvB? I've been noodling on a DmC/Halo x-over and a conglomerate x-over based in the movie Avengers verse with a little AU-ness... IDK. Lemme know, y'all! Ask your friends~!


	11. The Mid-Season Finale Special

Hey, sorry 'bout the hiatus, y'all, but Life. So... there.

Uh... I'm trying to write an extended chapter for you fine ladies, but I'm having brain-malfunctionitis and life is happening, so... It'll take a minute. Meanwhile, I'll give you some apology drabbles. They're in no explicit order and jump around a LOT in the time line. So... I know they're not fantastic, but... hey, it's something, mm?

Yeah, a lot of them are about Axton... I don't care—I like him. :)

Cover image: the full version can be found at firebird-warlord2 . deviantart art/KRIEG-Cover-poster-476891937 (copy, paste & remove the spaces, I guess)

NOTE: I know Axton's only 26 per canon, but in this story, I have to make it work with three different stories and 26 just isn't old enough.

Don't own no-one y'all recognize!

ENJOY, HOPEFULLY! :D

* * *

I

Wash and North were playing freeze tag with Gaige, Claptrap, Donut, Maya, Tucker and Caboose. Wash, Tucker and North were one team. They were 'it', while the others were almost all frozen in place. Gaige swore when North poked the back of her head, angrily freezing in place.

"Mal! Axton! Salvador! We need more people!" Maya yelled. Mal looked over at Axton.

"Only if one of the Spartan gals joins in," he said. Suddenly, Kelly was among the frozen individuals, untagging them one after the other. She danced away from North, Wash and Tucker easily, toying with them. Mal, Salvador and Axton dove into the group chasing down the trio of 'it' individuals that Kelly was still toying with. Mal tackled Wash, Axton brought North down and Salvador surprised everyone with a show of acrobatic grace, springing, triple-flipping and crashing down with his legs around Tucker's neck—head on.

"Ah! Fuck! I'm pretty sure this is illegal in tag!" Tucker protested.

"This is Pandora; there are no rules," Salvador laughed.

II

"Ok, look, sweetheart, I gave you that tip as payment for something. I don't _see_ that something, so you don't get anymore information about your mommy until I get what _I_ want," Jack gave the redhead a sinister smirk. "Who knows... I might accidentally loose that information..."

"_I'll get them, Jack. I told you I would._"

"You better, doll, or you're shit out of luck."

"_Understood. Judas Out._"

Jack eased back in his chair, boots up on the console. He rummaged in the bag of pretzels and popped one into his mouth, chewing slowly. Then a thought crossed his mind. He reached over and opened up an ECHO line. "Ah, hey there, kids! Man, these pretzels suck. Say, we haven't talked in a while. Lemme tell you about my day..."

III

"Long time no see, Jack."

"Want one?"

"I don't like that brand of pretzels. Try Snyders."

"Mm, good idea."

"So you got Wilhelm killed..."

"He outlived his usefulness."

"Ouch. Makes me worry..."

"Oh, honey... You're _special_. You'd never wear out your usefulness."

"Yes? Why's that?"

"Because you have something on a few of those assholes down there. I couldn't get rid of you even if I wanted to. Plus, you're pretty easy on the eye."

"Oh, Jack, you flirt, you."

"What's the line...? 'Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist'?"

"Ha, yeah, I think that's it, Handsome _Stark_."

"Haha, that's got a ring to it!"

"Too bad you have a heart that works on its own."

"Well, that depends on who you ask."

"Always does."

"And why would I give up this kind of conversation? Never worry about me kicking you to the side, darling."

"Oh, good. I hate goodbyes."

IV

Axton grabbed his pistol grip tighter, jamming the weapon into the ribs of the person who'd just crouched beside him, hand on his chest. Gaige's eyes shot wide and her lip trembled. Axton quickly stowed his pistol and sat up, hugging the girl tightly, even as she now struggled against him.

"Ah, shit, I'm sorry, Gaige... Just... Don't sneak up on an ODST in his sleep..." he told her, holding his arms a little bit out, putting space between their chests.

"S-sorry," Gaige whimpered, leaning into his chest again and sniffling as she buried her face against his collar.

"Hey, hey..." he gave her shoulder a gentle pat. "What's wrong?" Gaige was well used to weapons being pointed in her direction, by now. Sure, it was a bit of a shocker coming from the man who'd taught her how to shoot correctly, who'd been the closest thing to family to her in the whole group, even though they only knew each other for a few weeks. Then he noticed something. "Gaige... What did you...? Did you dye your hair?"

"Huh? No, I washed the dye out of it," Gaige said. "My hair's really red. Like Carolina red."

"Yeah it is..." Even in the dim lamplight, he could see the similarity between his ex-girlfriend's hair and the teenage mechromancer's. "Why'd you wash the dye out?"

"You like women with red hair," she shrugged. She'd seen the picture of his ex-wife and she knew Carolina. Axton swallowed hard against a wad of discomfort lodged in his throat. It dropped into his chest, pressing uncomfortably into his heart and gut at the same time.

"Jesus, Gaige, you're a freakin' kid..."

"I'm an adult!" she protested. "I'm almost nineteen!"

"Gaige, I'm old enough to be your father," Axton frowned. "Even if I wanted to... I couldn't."

"My dad is fifty-two. If you're younger than forty, suck it up," Gaige frowned. Axton sighed.

"Gaige, I'm _almost_ fifty," Axton sighed. "Forty-seven," he told her. She gave him a look of disbelief. "Fine, ok, I'm actually physically more like thirty-seven, but I _am_ forty-seven."

"So?"

"So I won't have sex with you because I'm old enough to be your father," Axton displaced her hand from his thigh to hers. She crossed her arms, shoving him back.

"You'd go back to stupid Carolina who stabbed you in the back, like, literally, but you won't even think about sleeping with me?"

"Thought about it, thought it was a bad idea, won't to do it."

"I don't wanna die a virgin!" Gaige snapped. "I want to loose it to someone I care about that cares for me and that I trust. I trust you most and I don't like anyone else _like that_. I mean, I _like_ Mal, but he reminds me of my cousin and that'd be weird, Sal and Scooter're gross, Zero's a Spartan and Spartans can't have sex because of their augmentations, DeMarco's cute but he's married, Tucker's creepy, Wash is Wash, North doesn't like girls, Simmons is a dork, Grif's too fat and not interested, Sarge is a creepy old dude, Wyoming's married, Maine's not... normal, Thorne's engaged, I don't trust Madsen not to give me an STD, Hoya and Grant have a thing, Caboose is Caboose and Donut is even gayer than North. I miss anyone?"

"Krieg."

"Ew."

"Thought you'd say that," Axton chuckled. "Oh, Captain Lasky."

"Ew, no! He reminds me of my dad!"

"Tom?"

"He's a Spartan."

"Right..." Axton scratched the back of his head. "Jeez, Gaige, I can't do it."

"You can even pretend I'm Carolina if you want!"

"No, Gaige."

"Pleaaaaase!"

"Fuck, Gaige! NO."

"HEY! SHUT UP, TROOPER!" Salvador's boot narrowly missed Axton's head and probably would've clocked him if he hadn't ducked.

"What the fuck are you yelling about?" Mal whined.

"Gaige, ODST's have a moral code thing about that," Naomi replied. "Trust me. And it's not that we can't, it's just that it's really difficult to get something started..."

"Crikey, Gaige, are you trying to seduce Axton?!" Mal blurted.

"Dude, did you just say 'crikey'?!"

"Shut the fuck up, Sal, there's more important shit goin' on." Mal was suddenly standing over Axton and Gaige, still shirtless from sleeping. "Seriously?"

"What?" Axton glared up at him. "I'm attractive! And a nice guy! That's two of many things I have on you."

"Yeah, well, I've got a bigger—"

That was as far as Mal got. A rifle crack interrupted him mid-word, the bullet zipping past his elbow. He dropped to the dirt, forcing the unarmed Gaige down.

"Contact left!" Axton called out, pointing his pistol in the direction of the shooter as he loaded his rifle one-handed. "Single combatant, seven o'clock, south west by the empty skag-den!"

"Talk about a mood killer, huh, sweet-'art?" Mal grumbled, crawling alongside Gaige back to their sleeping bags to retrieve their weapons.

"Yeah, tell me about it," Gaige pouted. Mal chuckled.

V

Axton huffed and moved, springing the corner, shotgun leveled. He took the head off the oncoming insurrectionist and booted the next one in the face, stamping them down into the concrete as he did. He shot the third as she approached, taking an arm off. Suddenly, he found himself staring down the barrel of a rifle... that Carolina was holding, fully armored in her turquoise plates.

"Carolina, it's me! It's York..."

"_Axton York, you are hereby sentenced to death... by order of Handsome Jack._"

He woke up before the bang, but the rifle crack was echoing in his ears.

"Axton?" Gaige was kneeling beside him, with Zero standing over her. "It's time for your watch."

"Yeah," he mumbled. "Thanks for waking me."

"Yeah, of course..." Gaige made a confused expression.

VI

_Krieg:Noun. German, trans: War. _

_Funny._

_Laugh, no really. It's funny._

_It's a bad joke that leaves this awful taste in your mouth._

_Or maybe that's just the aftertaste of biting that guy's arm. _

_Yuck. _

_But I can't even reach the wheel, so don't blame me. It's all him..._

_The fuckin' crazy-ass psycho named Krieg._

_Why won't he just kill me...?_

VII

Zero staggered, the glancing shot having taken more than he'd expected out of his helmet. The shattered glass and sparking metal were now nothing more than hazard to the mission. He tore off the helmet, dropping behind the cover of the boulder. Maya looked over at him, surprised.

"You're Asian?" she asked. He was more focused on the wound on his eyebrow. Head wounds bled, a lot. Not good for someone whose anatomy had been permanently damaged by a failed experiment. His blood was thinned out and the stress of the situation had his heart slamming in his chest. He wouldn't stop bleeding for a while and was liable to bleed out.

"Maya," he handed her his sniper rifle."I can't," she was intimidated by the piece of UNSC destructive power, to say the least. He ignored her, leaving the rifle propped against the rock. He was fumbling for a med hypo and it was made more difficult by the fact that the blood was in his vision and he couldn't see straight.

Then Naomi was with them.

"Help Zero," she said. Maya caught a glimpse of what an ancient Norse Valkyrie probably would've looked like in the minds of the people. The Spartan, painted in blood and dirt, was a machine of death, taking out anything within a hundred yards of their position with ease. Then she picked up the sniper rifle...

VIII

"Holy _shit!_" Axton snapped. "How have you not dislocated your shoulder?!"

"What?" Gaige glared up at him.

"Gaige, what the hell is wrong with this picture?" Axton scowled.

"I don't know!" Gaige fired back. "This is how I shoot!"

"It's _wrong!_" Axton frowned. "No wonder you can't hit anything..."

Gaige made to protest again, but Axton putting his hands on her arms made her stop and just watch him correct her. He forced the rifle butt up, into the meaty part of her shoulder, half an inch below her collarbone. He frowned and removed the rifle completely.

"Give me your hand," he said. She held out her hand. He gently placed her hand in his palm, cradling her wrist delicately. "This is how you hold the barrel. You don't choke the damn thing. It's a gentle, delicate hold. If you've got a proper form, you don't even need to hold it."

"So...?" Before Gaige could even finish asking what the proper form was, Axton was fixing her stance, kicking her feet into the right placement, fixing the angle of her hips and back, her shoulders.

"Keep your chest facing forward. I know it sounds counter-intuitive, but that's where the shielding is thickest and where your body armor is, if you're wearing any. Of course, sometimes it's ok to turn a little, but it's not advised to put your full side towards your enemy."

"Why?"

"One small-arms shot to the ribs, regardless of caliber," he dug his finger into her side to prove his point. She resisted the urge to giggle, which he saw and smirked quietly at. "Will put a hole in your lungs and your heart, and, if it ricochets off your ribs, everything else in your torso. You'd die too quickly for anyone to help you."

"Why'd you put my feet like that?"

"More stable," Axton said. "It helps your balance and makes it easier to move and shoot."

"Oh, ok," she nodded.

"Ok, so also, you don't tilt your head that far when you shoot. You're messing up your sights completely. Just rock your cheek against the stock... Yeah, like that," Axton smiled approvingly. "Now try shooting at that target. Three rounds. Slow as you like."

Gaige shot. The cluster was nice and tight, and very close to the center of the little figure on the sights, but off to the left a little and lower than actual center.

"Aw man. I wanted a head shot!"

"Well, he's still dead" Axton said. "Aim for center mass. I know that's where the shields are thickest, but it's easiest to aim for that. Aim for a headshot and you're liable to miss. Unless you're a super sniper, you probably won't get a headshot."

"Show me how you shoot," Gaige passed him the rifle. He preformed a quick weapon's check, unloading and clearing the rifle, reloading it, snapping back the charging handle and settling into position. She watched him sink down into a squat, putting his left palm on the dirt and sinking onto his belly.

"I like firing from the prone unsupported when possible," he told her. "My second favorite is when I've got a wall to shoot off and I kneel or stand."

"Why the prone unsupported?"

"It gives me a better sense of control. And it's very concealed. C'mon, hop down here," Axton said, adjusting the sights slightly before settling back into place. Gaige sprawled out beside Axton, watching him. He gently tapped his finger against the trigger, firing once. A hole appeared just above Gaige's cluster of shots and more towards the center than hers. "You squeeze just a little too hard on the trigger. That's why it's off to the left. Just kiss it with the pad of your finger..." He fired again and again before the magazine clicked empty. He hopped up, holding the rifle in a low ready and walked over to the target. He tore it off the makeshift frame and jogged back to Gaige. She glared at him when she saw what he'd done.

"Show off."

The smiley face of bullets with one shot right between the eyes still grinned up at her.

IX

Kelly looked sidelong at Zero. "Why'd you leave?"

"My body rejected most of the augments," he said. "I have some of the augments, at least, partially. But they also caused my blood to thin out. Can't drink, can't get shot..."

"So that's why you're a _wetwork_ asset?"

"I have the cloaking system. I don't get hit. I just do _hits_."

"Ah, I see," Kelly nodded and looked back down at her knife. Zero stuck his clean sword back in its sheath and set about taking apart his sniper rifle. "What about your hands?"

"I... slipped up on one of my first missions. I was lucky to have had a partner along. She saved my life."

"I know the partner?"

"Yeah, Allie."

"Really? Huh," Kelly smiled. "And what happened to her?"

"She's... MIA," Zero said, swallowing stiffly. He drew back the charging handle on his reassembled sniper. "Hey, is it just me or does Carolina look a little like her?"

"She does," Kelly said, thinking about the two women. "Acts like her, too. Fights like her."

"You think maybe...?"

"Well, it _is_ just the guys of us who'd have the most trouble with sex. I'd imagine Spartan women could still have sex, just not... desire it, necessarily. She could've gotten pregnant..."

"You know, it is just the guys whose bodies completely accepted the augments," Zero said. Kelly caught the change in tone. She laughed.

"Are you flirting with me?"

"What? Oh, Christ no!" Zero's helmet displayed a "O_o" face. "Ew. You're my sister!"

"I was kidding, K."

"Good. I think I threw up a little in my mouth because you said that."

Kelly laughed again.

* * *

So, I actually learned how to shoot from army people, so... that's how Army people shoot. IDK if ODST's shoot the same way, but what Axton told Gaige is what I know about shootin'. So... yeah. Prone (un)supported is actually really comfy to just chill in (you're just laying on your stomach on the ground), but sometimes your elbows get a little sore so... elbow pads. :) Anywho, no one who reads this go off and use my lesson to murder people. DO NOT DO IT. I WILL NOT BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE FOR YOUR QUESTIONABLE ACTIONS: YES, THIS IS A LIABILITY RELEASE STATEMENT.

Hints have been dropped. PUZZLE, MORTALS. PUZZLE. Dark shit's comin' in the next 8 chapters. Yeah, it gets dark. Some of you will hate me. But I dun care & I won't know unless you REVIEW!

'Kay, so also as you might possibly maybe have noticed, I DID add a cover image! :D Link to the full one:

Yeah, normal "broadcasting" will resume after the mid-season break on... IDK, probably 3 Sept 2014. Maybe longer... IDFK. Yeah, this is the mid-season finale special, I guess. :|

Until next time, mah lovelies~

Toodles!

Anarkyrie42


	12. Preview TrailerTeaser

PREVIEW TIEM PEOPLE. :D

* * *

"With all due respect, ma'am," Lasky glared up at Osman. "This isn't a profound testament to the power of humanity. This isn't a game... Hell, it ain't even complicated. This is revenge, ma'am, pure and simple. Something Spartans were never trained to do, but they're damn good at, for a first time wet run."

"_In that case, Captain... Instruct your Spartans to give this Handsome Jackass hell._"

"Yes ma'am."

(V)

"People find amazing things. And they exploit them and use them as corporate weapons until they've become so backward, they've erased the special meaning entirely!" Tannis was furious. "Jack did this with the Vault. You, Vault Hunters, go find this man and put an end to his foolishness."

(V)

The white and grey ONI armor blended against the turquoise Freelancer armor, creating a blinding frosty flurry of adrenaline and hurt as they fought. Carolina's back hit wall. He leaned forward, shoving her face-front against the wall. Cuffs clacked on her wrists. "I wanted to just let it go, my dear girl," he said. "But because you did York like that... I have to. You'll like the prison they'll send you to. Isolated. Silent. Cruel."

"Go to hell," she cursed.

"Been there, m' dear. It gave me back."

(V)

Angel wanted the hand to wipe away the tears threatening to fall. She knew he couldn't, though, just look at her sympathetically. He stunned her by pressing a surprisingly warm hand against her cheek, thumb smoothing away the rolling drop. "_You wanted to fly, Angel. I'm just helping you do that..._"

"_Firing MAC cannon._"

(V)

"Ax..."

"Gaige... I can—mmph!" Gaige's mouth crushed to his. Axton wanted to push her away. It was the right thing to do. But her robot hand had curled around his right ear. He wasn't about to risk loosing an ear for pushing her away. Besides... It was nice... Especially after having been betrayed so brutally. Again.

"Sorry," Gaige blushed as they parted. Axton lifted his head and pecked a kiss to her forehead.

"Don't be. It was nice."

This time, he kissed her.

(V)

"I wanted to tell you... I just... I couldn't," Dr. Halsey looked away. Kelly flicked her gaze from the ground to the only parent she remembered.

"I understand."

(V)

Kelly had never believed that people saw their lives flash before their eyes. She had never experienced this phenomenon before, so it just further backed that it was pure insanity, in her mind. But this time, she saw her life flash before her eyes. _Took the goddamn armor for granted... Fuck!_ She squeezed her eyes shut and turned her head away from Death.

But the deathblow never landed. She looked up, opening her eyes. All she could see was yellow. Then a rivulet of red splashed down, onto her visor. She looked up further. He tilted his unhelmeted head down...

(V)

Krieg brought down his buzz-saw axe, shouting in a thunderous voice. Jack didn't have time to flinch.

"THE PAIN GOES HERE!"

(V)

"_And then someone says in a dramatic voice: This is only the beginning! And then the credits roll in and there's a little dramatic music an—"_

_"Sarge, Roosterteeth already used that joke before..."_

_"Well, someone oughta tell the author!"_

_"Who do you suggest? None of us are Deadpool! We can't even crack the fourth wall!"_

_"Why you... Damn it, Grif!"_

* * *

Lol, people, I know it's not a TV show, but the whole reason for doing this preview is because of that last section... Red vs Blue. And Deadpool, who really needs his own movie.


	13. Chicken Soup From The Borderlands

Ok, so I'm home, sick in bed, and I was thinking, gosh... It's a whole week away until I get to post the chapter that's burning a hole in my pocket... Damn... what can I do...? Then I thought, well, shit. I could just write somethin' up to entertain myself. So... blah. Here ya go.

Don't own sh*t, except, y'know, the people y'all don't recognize.

* * *

I

_Late September, early October  
Sanctuary_  
PANDORA  
"So there I was, surrounded by the bastards when—"

"Whoa, hang on, there, what's going on?" Axton lowered his hands as North interrupted. "He tellin' you about the sarcophagus?"

"Yeah, he was just getting to the good part, too!" Gaige protested.

"Ah, bullshit," Wash snorted. "Let's get back to the good part. Ok, he's on the roof, right, and we're down maybe ten stories trying to figure out how to get this big ass metal box up to him on the roof. So York drops down the window washer lift and Maine—hey! Maine, you remember that one mission? The Sarcophagus?"

Maine growled and Wash chuckled.

"Ok, so me and Maine move the thing onto the washer lift and Carolina hands him the chord. I realized right away what she wanted him to do and so did he and Maine was all like, 'No way, bitch!'"

"And then Carolina kicked him out the window," Axton laughed. "Man, I almost felt sorry for the guys on ground floor."

"Yeah, that's what I said!" Wash grinned. "Anyway, Maine's on the ground floor 'entertaining' our hosts and me and Carolina are in the exhibit trying to get out. This guy with a flame thrower busts down the door and I grab this badass looking alien rocket launcher thing..."

"It was a fuel rod cannon, wasn't it?" Naomi grinned.

"Oh, God, I hate those things!" Kelly made a face. "The rods bounce," she told Gaige and Maya. "They don't explode at first, they have to bounce at least once before they detonate."

"And I didn't know that!" Wash protested. "I was a rookie coming out of boot when I went into Freelancer and I was keeping up with these veteran marines and ODST's and Rangers and the like. Anyway, it bounced. And the flame thrower guy is like 'pfft! Moron!' So Carolina throws grenades into a banshee—that's this purple plane-frog looking Covenant plane-thing—and kicks it at him. It blows up, we head up to the roof and we're surrounded."

"Oh no!" Maya exclaimed.

"Yeah, anyway," Wash took a sip of beer before continuing. "The lead guy demands to know what this bomb-looking thing one of the other agents set up was. So York checks it out and he's all like, 'It's not a bomb, it's a transmitter'."

"So then the guy asks me what it's transmitting. I check. It was transmitting its own coordinates," Axton says. "So then I'm SO glad for the Minuteman armor's whole catheter hook up and waste disposal system."

"Why?" Maya asked.

"All UNSC combat ships are equipped with MAC cannons," Gaige said. "Which need to have a very accurate firing solution, otherwise... it's a pain. They take a minute to charge up."

"MAC cannons?" Maya was confused.

"Really, really big guns," Mal held his hands up, as if he couldn't quite explain the size of the gun with just words. "Right beautiful pieces of hardware they are, but they're massive and firing blind can be really daft."

"So the transmitter's transmitting its coordinates to the _Mother of Invention_, right?" Maya asked. "For the MAC cannon solution?"

"Exactly," Axton nodded. "So as you can imagine, we're shitting bricks, me, Wash, Carolina and Tex. If that gun goes off with me holding the little transmitter thing and them standing within five yards of me, we're dead. Hell, within thirty yards they'd be dead. Cuz not only is the propulsion from the actual shot behind the shot, but gravity from falling into orbit," Axton continued.

"So he looks at the guy while Tex and Carolina cause hell, and says 'Hey, mind holdin' this for me? Thanks!' And we all just fucking _run_," Wash said. "All of a sudden, we heard this BOOM and the building was coming down," Wash continued. "I made it to the pelican with the sarcophagus, Tex had a jet pack and York and Carolina are just free-falling."

"Then I look over at Carolina, as we're falling, and I ask her 'Hey, what happened to Maine?' then WHAM, we're in a Warthog," Axton paused for a sip of his drink.

"And York goes, 'Are we in a car?!'" Carolina finished. By now, Maya and Gaige were giggling at Axton's antics in Project Freelancer.

II

_Some time ago...__The Mother of Invention  
_DEEP SPACE  
York backtracked, stopping beside Tex. She never came into the locker room, but there she was. She didn't look happy, either. Tex pushed her hair back, turning her head away from York as he backed up. Her hair fell into her face.

"You okay?" he remembered to keep a safe distance from her, but wanted to comfort her.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Tex stood abruptly. "I just have someone back home that I miss, a lot."

"Yeah?" York tipped his head to the side. "Boyfriend? Husband?"

"No, a... sister," Tex said. "Why do you care?"

"I joined the marines because I was sick of seeing sad faces in my town," York said. "I hate sad people."

"Then you must detest me utterly," Tex joked bitterly. York snorted.

"Detest? Sure, but not you. I hate you being sad, sorry. I worded it bad before."

"Thanks for caring, York," Tex nodded and left the locker room.

III

_Late September, Early October  
Sanctuary  
_PANDORA"Ok, you got me on Aliens..." Brick drummed his fingers on the bartop, thinking hard. The Spartans and ODST's awaited his next scenario patiently. "Ok, ok. One word: Zombies."

"Three words," Kelly said, holding her hand up, three fingers raised. "Squad automatic weapon."

"One word: Shotgun," Axton continued.

"Hatchets, flame throwers, Molotovs, armor and firearms with silencers," Mal said. They all looked at him. "I watch Zombie movies..."

"Spartans would be great against them!" Sal said. "They'd take those zombies apart!

"What if a Spartan got infected?" Gaige asked.

"Are they armored?" Mal asked. Gaige nodded.

"Then any non-Spartan in the area would be up shit creek," Axton snorted. "Although, you wouldn't necessarily have to worry about getting infected by bite."

"Right, helmet," Mal nodded. "But they'll rip you apart."

"Ok, let's clarify something," Kelly interrupted. "Zombies. Living dead. Flesh eating walking corpses, right?"

"Yeah," Mal said.

"What portion of the nervous system is still active?" Fred asked.

"None, I guess?" Mal shrugged.

"Which logically makes no sense," Kelly pointed out. "Given that they're walking. Ok, so if their nervous system isn't working, their neural implants wouldn't work, right?"

"Right," Axton said.

"So the armor would just be dead weight. Tracking?" Fred said.

"_Riiiiight_..." Mal nodded.

"Infected Spartans would be completely safe," Kelly said, shrugging. "They can't move hardly at all, they can't bite you..."

"How would a Spartan get infected in the first place?" Maya asked. "Isn't that Mjolnir completely self-contained?"

"Contaminated water," Axton said. "You guys still use canteens, right?"

"Theoretically we could survive exponentially on recycled water," Naomi shrugged.

"Ew," Gaige pulled a face.

"Hey, you take what you can get in the field," Kelly shrugged. "Ambush?"

"Zombies aren't smart enough to ambush," Gaige snorted.

"So in short, we'd rock a zombie apocalypse," Fred smirked.

"How about..." Brick thought long and hard. "A magical pony apocalypse?"

Fred reached into his pocket and withdrew a bundle of dynamite.

"Well," Brick huffed. "I'm out of ideas."

* * *

Just some funny drabbles to make me feel better. I hope y'all enjoyed them, too. So... Anarkyrie642 on Deviantart. I'll take suggestions for drawings you guys would like to see of the guys and gals!


	14. Chapter 9

Claptrap: Hellooooooo traveler! New chapters are available right here! Also, Anarkyrie posted the Vault Hunter intro posters of Mal, Siobhan, Kelly and Naomi on her Deviantart at Anarkyrie642. deviantart. com! Please, feel free to visit!

Death, deception, pain, author-jerking-your-heart-strings-and-cackling-madly... Don't hate me. I own Siobhan, Rook and anyone else y'all don't know. So... yeah. There's a little cuteness, flashbacks and feels in this one. Little bit of heartache. Not much.

Only reason I'm updating on Monday, 1 Sept., is because I feel like it. And I want to get this out there. But next week, it'll be on Wednesday~ and so on...

Also, note: Like I said, there'll be flashbacks. Pay attention to the place and date headings. You'll get confused real quick if you don't.

* * *

CHAPTER NINE

REACH  
2521  
Kelly lie panting between John and Fred. They'd somehow wound up together (she was always with John, but had never teamed up with Fred before) and had been more successful than ever. Kelly had met Fred the once, but somehow it was just easy to work with him—almost easier than Sam. All three of them were spattered in paint (spray-off, no direct hits) and dirt and sweat. They had twigs in their hair and they were sore.

Fred sat up abruptly. "I think I hear someone coming," he whispered. They moved quickly into hiding places, Kelly in a tree, John under the same one, in the roots, and Fred vanishing completely.

A moment later, Kurt's group passed. Solomon paused for a heartbeat, looking over his shoulder, towards where John was, hidden under the roots. He took few steps towards the tree when a rock whipped from the opposite direction, clanking off his helmet. He turned and pointed his paintball gun in that direction. Kurt led the exploratory jab into the trees. Kelly scanned for Fred. If he went down, they'd loose the match.

Suddenly, John burst from under the tree, gunning at the trio from behind. Kurt turned, opening fire just as John jammed down on the trigger.

Kurt missed.

John didn't.

They'd won.

(V)

PANDORA  
_Sanctuary  
Three Horns_  
24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
Kelly was almost certain the yellow-armored Spartan was there.

She fought her way through the streets, watching ODST's and marines compete with robots and Hyperion personnel for inches of real estate. But she had a much more specific goal in mind than.

And she found him.

He was facing off against four Spartan IV's at the same time. And winning. One of the Spartans cursed loudly as they were thrown from the fight. Kelly darted in and sprang, planting both boots on the Hyperion Spartan's helmet as he turned. She felt glass give under her boots, but restrained her victory. A solid elbow to her abdomen had her laid out on the ground. A boot came down and she couldn't roll in time.

But it never landed.

She looked over and saw _Krieg_ tangled with the Spartan. He brought down his buzz-saw axe, cutting into the yellow armor with the high keen of an over-exerted electric saw. It broke as it tossed sparks, pieces of shrapnel showering all in a linear direction. The Hyperion soldier threw Krieg, but the psycho caught himself, vaulting off the Spartan IV the throw was designed to take out as well. He engaged in futile hand-to-hand combat, left arm snapping loudly as it was jerked awkwardly under an armored elbow. Then the dislocating pop of his shoulder... Krieg drove his kitchen knife into the soldier's knee and twisted. The Hyperion soldier staggered back under renewed gunfire and activated a teleporter, vanishing. Kelly pushed herself off the ground, still reeling. Krieg was up and snarling at anyone who came near. Except Kelly.

"Krieg?" she asked. He responded with a calm stare. "Want me to look at that?" she continued, pulling a med hypo out of her pocket. He held his arm close to his chest, but edged closer. She injected the hypo, his arm healing instantly, straightening out under the bandages. Then she relocated his shoulder, eliciting a soft grunt of pain. He gave her a look thanking her quietly. She nodded.

(V)

Kelly was starting to really hate snow. She had it down her shirt this time and the cold on her spine was unpleasant to say the least.

"Fuck-_er,_" Mal grumbled, kicking snow out of his pant leg. "What was that for, Lilly?"

"_Sorry, guys!_" Lilith told them over the ECHO. "_I totally didn't mean to do that. But... ugh... I guess maybe I did. I need you to keep boots on ground._"

"What?" Gaige looked up. "But Scooter said the engine calibration was off and it would take months to fix. I looked at it myself, the rotors need realignment and the accel—"

"Gaige, she gets that it's fucked up," Salvador said.

"Where're you takin' it?" Siobhan asked.

"_I... I don't know_," Lilith replied as Sanctuary lifted out of the ground, dirt and stone falling from the massive rotors.

"You beautiful flying piece of junk," Gaige stared up in wonder. Axton chuckled.

"Mother of invention, huh?" he muttered to himself.

"Huh?" Gaige asked.

"Nothin'," Axton replied.

"_Aw, this is one of those times!_" Scooter cackled. He sucked in a breath. "_CATCH A RIIIIIIIIIDE!"_

And Sanctuary was gone.

Kelly sank down on her heels, staring at the massive crater, a mixture of negative feeling prickling down her spine.

"We need to get to the prison Roland an' DeMarco are being held at," Siobhan said. "But we also need to find Sanctuary. Kelly, you take the non-Spartans and look for Sanctuary. Zero, Naomi and I'll track down Roland an' DeMarco."

"Okay," Kelly said, standing slowly. "But before we part ways, I think I oughta share something."

"What is it?"

"That Hyperion soldier... the Spartan-like one..." Kelly paused, words lodged in her throat. "I thi... that _was_ John."

(V)

PANDORA  
_The UNSC_ Queen's Bishop  
_Planetary orbit  
_24.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
"_Reestablishing contact with... Sanctuary_," Dante reported.

"Sanctuary, this is Captain Charles Rook of the UNSC _Queen's Bishop_, do you copy?" Rook's tone was as close to edgy as most of his crewmen had ever heard it. The calm-voiced Spartan searched the static-filled screen for any signal of life on the other end. The static cleared a little and a tinny version of Roland the AI came through.

"_Sir, we're experiencing some trouble right now..._" Roland managed.

"Dante, where are they?" Rook looked at his ship's AI.

"_I can't lock on. I don't know, sir,_" Dante replied.

"Roland?"

"_No idea where we are, either, sir._"

(V)

PANDORA  
_Three Horns  
Sanctuary Hole  
_24.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Siobhan and her team had taken off in one direction, leaving Kelly with the rest of them. Mal and Axton cleaned weapon while Kelly brooded. There was still a pelican and two Warthogs left. They could load one Warthog _into_ the cargo area and seat the rest of the team with, a pilot and co-pilot in the cockpit, and the other Warthog could hook onto the undercarriage of the bird. But she didn't have any headings to follow.

"_Kelly...?_"

Kelly was furious, at first, but intrigued. "What do you want, Angel?"

"_Jack doesn't know... I tried to tell Roland, but I couldn't get to him... and I couldn't tell you to stay away or Jack would've known._"

"I'm listening."

"_I can't find Sanctuary, and I can't find a connection with the fast-travel network, but you should be able to use a lunar beacon to triangulate the correct coordinates. From there, I can get you a new, uncalibrated fast travel station and put in Sanctuary's coordinates when I locate it._"

"And where do I find this beacon?"

"_There's a facility in the Highlands. I can mark it on your ECHO when you get closer. The Highlands shouldn't be hard to find..._"

"Ax! Map?" Kelly strode over. Axton pulled the page out of his pocket and handed it up to her. Kelly scanned the map, memorizing the contours of lines. "Ok, people! Pack up. We're moving out."

"Where to?" Mal asked.

"Angel contacted me. Said she wanted to warn us, but couldn't because Jack would've known," Kelly said. There was protest. "Right now she's the only one who knows how to find Sanctuary. After we find Sanctuary, we need to go back to the _Infinity_, though."

"How's that?" Maya asked.

"He tortured and manipulated John. He's killed millions... On behalf of the UNSC, I'm taking his head and..." Kelly shook her head, snorting a little huff of a laugh. "I want Jack to see what his face looks like, reflected in my visor, when I kill the fucker."

(V)

AREA UNKNOWN  
_Unidentified UNSC __ship  
__Spartan Barracks_  
2530 (UNSC Calendar)  
Kelly pointed it out first. It was just visible under the edge of Fred's t-shirt sleeve. Anyway, the tail and talons were. She pushed the edge of his sleeve up with her fingertip. "What did you do...?" she asked, raising an eyebrow at her blushing brother.

"I got a tattoo," Fred stated.

"John will flip his shit when he sees that," Kelly said.

"When John sees what?"

They both looked over at the Spartan in question, who was rolling down his own sleeve, to cover a similar tattoo.

"Or not," Kelly giggled.

"Now you have to get one," Kurt smirked, displaying his right arm proudly, with the same tattoo on him.

"Where'd you three get the tattoos?" Linda tilted her head to the side.

"One of the ODST's has a tattoo kit," Kurt replied. "Like it?"

"It's just the insignia," Kelly shrugged. Fred turned his back to her, pulling his shirt up, hitching it on the back of his neck. On his right shoulder blade, there was a Hoplite-style helmet with 104 printed on the side, near the edge of the metal part.

"How about that one?" Fred asked.

"I want one," Kelly said. "Y'know, with 087 on it."

"Sergeant Reggie Baker is the trooper with the tattoo kit," Kurt said. So, he and Fred walked with Kelly to go meet Sergeant Baker.

(V)

PANDORA  
_En route to the Highlands_  
25.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Kelly woke with a jump, surprising the hell out of Maya and Gaige, seated opposite him. "Where...?" she didn't get the question out, as her brain processed the familiar surroundings and a sense of calm washed over her before she got past it to the pain of heartache. She stood and strode through the cabin, towards the cockpit. She saw Axton was flying, expression set in a firm look of concentration.

"We're an hour out," Axton told her. "Managed to get Roland on a drive before Lilith tossed us off Sanctuary. Says he left behind a fragment to help with comms. He's working on something now, though, so he doesn't want to be bothered."

"How long was I out?" Kelly asked, scratching her scalp. Axton sniffed and glanced at his watch.

"Two hours seventeen minutes," he said. "Go back to sleep if you want..."

"When's the last time _you_ got some shut eye?" Kelly frowned.

"I'm an ODST. We don't need sleep," he snorted.

"Well, I'm a Spartan. Most people think I'm a robot. I don't need sleep either. Fully charged..." she shrugged, sliding into the co-pilot's seat. "Can't have the only other sane person on this craft pass out in a firefight," she added with a little smile. Axton gave in and transferred control to the co-pilot.

"Hey, Kelly..." he paused in the doorway. "I get what you're feeling. Carolina... you know what she was to me. She tried to kill me, and that was on her_ own_ conscious power. If that yellow death machine is John, he's not operating himself. We'll get him back. I promise."

"Axton... You shouldn't make promises you can't keep," Kelly said, her tone little more than a whisper.

"Yeah, well, I don't intend to break this one," Axton said. "May God strike me blind, deaf and crippled if I'm lying, I mean it. We'll get Chief back."

(V)

PANDORA  
_The Dust_  
25.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
"So we're invading _that_?" Naomi raised an eyebrow, looking across the sands at the massive prison structure. The walls were huge and guarded with autoturrets.

"Says the Spartan," Zero muttered. "Doesn't look too hard. I could get up that wall and take out the turrets."

"Do it," Siobhan said. "Naomi and I will follow you up. Get us a location on Roland and provide overwatch."

"Aye aye, ma'am," Zero said.

Once they got to the "Friendship Gulag" it was just a matter of getting Zero up the wall. Which he did easily with a crowbar he'd "borrowed" from Ellie and length of rope. Zero came onto the wall right under one of the auto turrets. He quickly severed the hydraulics with his sword and placed his hands under the turret. With a show of his Spartan strength, he forced the turret to aim at another, tossing out one of his holograms as he did. The turret opened fire and Zero jammed it around after it destroyed the other turret, destroying another and another and finally leaving it to hang, angrily firing at the Loaders and Hyperion Security Personnel that had started to file out to handle the commotion. He pulled out his sniper rifle and squatted beside the turret, opening fire. Using his neural implant, he flashed two green lights on their narrow beam to Siobhan's HUD.

Moments later, Naomi and Siobhan came over the wall, opening fire with their caustic rifles as they landed, boots in dirt, easily. A spring from that height would shatter the knees, ankles, hips and spine of anyone who hadn't received Spartan augmentations. But with their virtually indestructible bones, the two Valkyries charged the battlefield, cutting through robots and people alike.

The turret ground its gears, trying to shoot after the two women, but was unable to.

Siobhan ducked behind a low wall as the massive Constructor pointed at them, settled between them and Roland and DeMarco.

"Crazy fucking Spartan women!" Roland shouted. "How the hell...?"

"It wasn't that hard," Naomi called out to them, stopped behind a column. She looked across at Siobhan.

"On my mark," Siobhan said. Naomi nodded. "Mark!"

"Sync," Naomi replied, springing in sync with Siobhan. They somersaulted across the gap between their positions, firing at the Constructor as they moved.

"Hey, K? Now would be nice!"

"_One sec_," Zero zeroed his sights on the unshielded red eye of the Constructor as it dropped its shield to construct a WAR-Loader. Three shots from his corrosive Maliwan sniper loaded with his UNSC-grade high-vec armor piercing rounds were too much. The Constructor collapsed, a crushed chunk of scrap. Naomi and Siobhan moved quickly to Roland and DeMarco_. "Check your six_!" Zero snapped. He couldn't do too much without risking hitting them, but tried anyway. There were too many personnel for the fire rate of the weapon to handle.

Naomi whirled on the spot, opening fire. She managed to take out a few before one of the Loaders sank her one right through her shield. She dropped, a hand on her hip. Naomi propped her weapon on her knee, keeping it in her shoulder, and shot, covering Siobhan as she hacked the lock. Siobhan managed to get Roland and DeMarco out. Naomi handed DeMarco her weapon and set about tending to her hip. She was out of hypos, but had a canister of biofoam, which she filled her injury with. The bullet had lodged against her hip, rather than ricocheting around her torso, which made her happy.

"I feel totally helpless without the Mjolnir," she muttered. Roland had managed to drop his scorpio, covering her as she tended to herself.

"Bullshit," Roland snorted. "Even if you were just in your drawers you'd still be a more effective soldier than ANY OF THESE HYPERION SHITBAGS!"

"Oh, ew!" DeMarco made a face.

"What?" Naomi raised an eyebrow.

"Imagining one of the Spartan II's in their underwear?! That's like imagining my _mother_ in her underwear!" DeMarco mimed vomiting as he continued to shoot at the robots.

"That aside, we've got to move," Siobhan interrupted.

"After you, ma'am," Roland said. DeMarco hauled Naomi to her feet, holding her up against his side. He didn't like shooting left-handed, but he had to. She had her pistol out now and was shooting as they moved. They paused, beside a wall as Zero laid out some cover with the busted turret. A few moments later, they were outside the prison, in one of the technicals, driving towards Ellie's garage.

"Bet you never thought you'd be doing that," DeMarco said, looking around at the other Spartans. "Certainly never thought I would be."

"What, breaking into a prison?" Naomi seemed amused. "No, of course not. Innies and Covvies don't take UNSC prisoners."

"I've never fought Innies," DeMarco remarked.

"Different generation," Zero sighed, keeping his eyes on the road and the pedal close to the floor. "And yes, they do, by the way. But only if the person's really important."

"Like who?" Roland asked.

"Like Spartans 002, 063 and 007. I was dispatched to retrieve them a few years back," Zero said. "My first op for ONI as an asset."

"There's actually a 007?" Roland seemed highly amused by this.

"Is his name James?" DeMarco snickered.

"No, James was 005. 007's name is Beau," Siobhan clarified.

"It's a joke, ma'am," Roland said. "There's these movies and books with a British spy, Agent 007... His name is James Bond..."

"Spartan II, dear," Naomi reminded Roland. "We're completely ignorant to any and all pop culture references you might make."

"Oh... right..."

(V)

PANDORA  
_The Highlands_  
25.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Kelly set the pelican down beside the Warthogs. They were just beside an old train station, settled down on what was left of the platform.

"Gaige, you're with Mal and Axton and Salvador. Krieg and Maya, you're with me," Kelly informed the Psycho and the Siren. Maya climbed into the passenger's seat while Krieg clambered into the bed. Kelly's car lead them out. A diamond appeared on the ECHO map on the device she'd placed on the dash. Kelly glanced at the map. "Maya, navigate."

"Keep following the road. I'll tell you when to turn off."

"We're exposed. Stay east?"

"Yeah."

Kelly turned off the road, the tires grinding over the uneven ground better than any of Scooter's runners or Ellie's technicals. Kelly had missed the smooth handle on the Warthog. Seemed like Mal had, too. He smirked to himself as he gunned after her, fingers draped on the wheel, rather than curled around it.

Kelly pulled over and parked the Warthog when they were a quarter mile from the factory. She got out and the others followed suit. Mal and Axton in the rear, Kelly in front with Krieg and Gaige, Salvador and Maya in the middle. It was quiet going. The few Skags they encountered ran rather than fight. Made sense. They were pups. Salvador joked about Kelly's Alpha female pheromones being the reason for their scattering.

It was a smooth, silent assault into the compound. Kelly and Axton moved in first, low with their combat knives out and rifles slung. Axton slit throats and jammed his blade under jaws, but Kelly preferred the knife to the base of the skull. The group followed them up at a distance. No alarms were raised, no bots had a chance to attack.

"Too easy," Salvador frowned.

"Agreed," Kelly scanned the open arena-like area. The gate slammed shut.

"_Oh no! They spotted you!_"

"Shit," Kelly growled.

"_Kelly, be advised, those Thresher things I showed you before...?_" Roland spoke for the first time in ages. "_There's a really big one down there. If you move..._"

"It already saw me," Kelly growled, dropping into a runner's crouch. "Be right back," Kelly said before taking off, putting as much into the sprint as she could. Her fingers curled around the annoyingly obvious trap of a beacon and she felt the ground give under her. She managed to make it part way, but the thresher's jaws closed around her hips, leaving just her upper half hanging free. She squirmed around, so she was facing the sky as the thresher rose its full length out of the ground and Loaders began filing in. "Catch!" she yelled to no one in particular and threw the beacon.

Gaige sprang and caught the beacon, barreling back into Krieg, who set her down gently before darting for the thresher. Between the two ODST's, the marine, the siren, the Psycho, Axton's turret and Deathtrap, Gaige didn't have much to do besides hold the beacon. After the battle, the thresher re-surfaced and attacked them. Krieg buried his axe in it and all guns pointed at the massive mess of worm bodies.

Suddenly, the thresher sliced open from the inside and whatever it had eaten last spilled forth, coiled around Kelly and laced with the disgusting slime of its insides and its blood. Kelly peeled herself off the ground, shaking her head to clear the slime from her face. Krieg threw a flying tackle on her, slapping grossly as he impacted on her side, hugging her tightly and drenching himself in the sludge.

Kelly laughed.

(V)

"_Kelly, ya can't get to Sanctuary through the Fast Travel teleports."_

"Working on that, ma'am," Kelly replied. She changed ECHO channels. "Angel! Where the hell is my Fast Travel station?!"

"_Working on it!" _Angel snapped. "_Darn it!"_

_"Hang_ on," Roland the AI said. A moment later, the pod shot down and the robots stopped dropping. Axton kicked the one his tomahawk was stuck in the faceplate of and yanked the tomahawk out, stumbling back as the release of the weapon knocked him off balance. Gaige giggled as she caught him.

"Have a nice trip?" she asked, smirking down at him. He smiled crookedly up at her.

"Yes, with a very nice landing," Axton said, making Gaige giggle. She helped him straighten up, dusting off his shirt and straightening it out a little. Axton put his tomahawk away, slinging his rifle. "So?"

"_Working on it... I can't find Sanctuary_," Angel frowned.

"_I got it,_" Roland grumbled. "_Extrapolating coordinates from my fragment...And...Ta-dah._"

"_You should be able to use it, now, to get to Sanctuary._"

(V)

PANDORA  
_Sanctuary  
_25.09.2559  
(UNSC calendar)  
Lilith raised an eyebrow at the sticky, filthy Spartan and Psycho. "Do I want to know?"

"No," Kelly replied. "Showers?"

"Down stairs and to the left. Past the washers."

Kelly and Krieg left the room and then the screens crackled and the images changed from whatever they were broadcasting to Handsome Jack's masked face. _"Hey, congratulations, Vault Hunters. You successfully made a city float and broke into one of my prisons. Yay! Good for you! What the hell do you people possibly think you have on me? I took out the UNSC's most advanced soldiers and ship without displacing a single hair. What've you possibly got?"_

"Pissed off Spartans and the most powerful siren alive," Axton replied casually, picking at a stray thread on his sleeve. "Honestly, I'm not sure which one is scarier."

(V)

Kelly started down the stairs, Krieg trailing after her.

She didn't care about showering with Krieg. She'd been showering with men all her life. Of course, most of the time, those men were her brothers. She didn't even wait to cross the threshold into room completely before casting off her vest and ECHO. She stripped off her shirt and belt and shoved her pants down. Krieg dropped his backpack and started to strip. In one of the somehow-still-shiny locker doors, Kelly saw something surprising. She turned around, stripped to just her panties, giving Krieg the most surprised and puzzled look in the history of surprised and puzzled looks.

"...Fred?"

* * *

Well, that's it, ladies. I bet I had you goin' there, thinking Kelly would die inside a thresher. NOPE. KAY AIN'T GOT NOTHIN' ON KELLY! :D (MIB, anyone?)

YEP, I finally just came out and said it. Krieg is Fred. No one hate me, please? :D Thanks.

I hope you enjoy this second half of the "season." Oh, by the way, there's going to be a sequel (on Kashyyk, I think (that's how it's spelled, right?) and I'll probably add at least one of the DLC campaigns, like... Tiny Tina's Assault On Dragon's Keep.

Lasky: Why are we playing this kid's game again...?

Mordecai: Yeah, I'm with Cap. Why do we have to play this?

Tina: Maybe because... SHUT THE HELL UP, MORDY! Lasky, continue to question if you feel like it, but I WON'T TELL YOU! YOU KNOW THE ANSWER IN YOUR HEART OF HEARTS ALREADY!

Lasky: ... No, but I won't ask again since you kind scare me.

Tina: N'aaaaaw! Shawty, you so cute when you terrified! :D

Lasky: o_= ...wtf.

And probably also Torgue's Campaign Of Carnage. C'mon... Who wouldn't want to see Spartans go all gladiator on some bandits and wanna-be badasses?

Naomi: ... No, I'm spending the week of leave at Moxxi's. You'll have to drag me out.

Axton: Ditto.

Kelly: Sounds like fun...? I guess...

Krieg: THE SYMPHONY OF AGONY IS ABOUT TO BEGIN! PLEASE TAKE YOUR SEATS AND SILENCE ALL ELECTRONICS!

Kelly: ... on second thought...


	15. Chapter 10

Claptrap: Helloooooo, Traveler! New chapters available right here!

I don't know why, but this one was difficult. I feel like I've got nothing to add, now... I mean, Kelly's pieced together where John is, now, and she knows Krieg is Fred... So... I feel just so... spent. So this chapter feels a lot like filler, but here joo goes.

Maya: You've still got a long way to go, lady. So keep pushing!

I know, I know! Just go the thing.

Maya: Anarkyrie doesn't own anyone that anyone recognizes. She isn't 343 or 2K, clearly.

Yes, exactly.

* * *

CHAPTER TEN

You're an awful actress._

[I don't know what you mean, Roland. I'm offended.]

Oh, bullshit. You know full well what I'm talking about. That thing with the Fast Travel location?_

[I really didn't know where it was.]

You traced the signal between my main body, so to speak, and my fragment. You knew _exactly_ where it was._

[No, I didn't...]

Coy doesn't suit really you, Angel._

[And just what does, Roland?]

Neither does playful, Angel._

[Oh, Roland! Be fun, just for a second.]

I'm an AI, Angel. I don't have the programming for 'fun,' and you are very well aware of that._

[Oh, come on, Roland...]

Angel..._

[If I didn't know better, I'd think that ought to be accompanied with an eye roll, sir.]

I don't have eyes, Angel. I can't eye roll. So, you're with us, right?_

[Of course. I mean, I have no choice but to play his game, too, but I want to be on your side.]

Good. I have a surprise for you. I'll give it to you when I see you._

[Aren't you 'seeing' me right now?]

I mean when I actually come face to face with you. I'll physically meet you very soon, I think._

[Physically, so to speak.]

Yes, so to speak._

[I can't wait. I've never had an actual friend before. It'll be nice to meet you, finally, face-to-face!]

Until then, Angel.

[Bye, Roland!]

Goodbye._

(V)

PANDORA  
_Sanctuary_  
25.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
"Right under our fucking noses!" Kelly shouted. She saw Lasky wince on the other side of the video link, frowning. He looked over at Dr. Halsey.

"_Did you know about Fred?_"

"_I had no idea. Jack kept me on the moon base...but, if my guesses are correct, they would've been experimenting on Frederic at a slag experimentation facility, likely the Wildlife Exploitation Preserve. Jul's heard about that place from a few of his guards. They took some of his men there."_

"Jesus," Axton whistled. "Imagine that? Elite versions of Krieg."

"Fred," Kelly corrected.

"_No,_ Krieg," Roland the AI said. "_That Spartan you knew, your brother... He might be buried in there, but that's not him running the show. It's someone else in control. Only thing we know to call him by is Krieg_."

Kelly sank down in one of the chairs.

"Well, if Dr. Halsey's right, that's where Mordecai headed, the wildlife preserve," Lilith said. "Might be a good idea to destroy the place entirely."

"Burn the fucker to the ground," Kelly growled.

"Easy, sailor," Mal said. "There's a reason you were trained to be cold."

"Kelly, let's head out to see what Mordecai's got for us to look at. He's a vet, so he knows the kind of shit we're looking for," Axton said.

"Maya, Sal and Gaige are waiting on us," Mal added.

"Ok, let's go," Kelly followed the two ODST's out.

"_Unbridled rage outta a Spartan should make anyone shit their pants,_" Lasky said. "_Maybe that's what you folks need._"

"Might be exactly what we need."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Trainwreck Tundra  
The _Infinity  
25.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
"Sir! We got one in the air!"

Lasky rushed out of his tent, craning his neck to see the frigate, lurching into the air. A grin stretched across his face. He turned to the lieutenant who'd told him. "Keep working on the others."

"What about the _Infinity_, sir?"

"If it takes her longer to get airborne fine, but I want those frigates in the air ASAP. They're more useful in-atmo, since they're smaller. And lemme know when the Longswords and Sabers are up."

"Yessir!"

Lasky turned to Dr. Halsey and Jul 'Mdama. "Hey, Jul... Ever heard of the human game 'Battleship'?"

"I do not believe I have," Jul frowned, or made the approximate equivalent for a Sangheili.

"Well, it's easy. Lemme show you..." Lasky spread out the map the party from Sanctuary had returned with, Hyperion plants and bases highlighted. "Jack took out our carrier, right? So... let's work on sinking all his little boats while the so-dubbed Vault Hunters work on sinking _his_ battleship..."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Sanctuary_  
26.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
"So if Jack can wake up this Warrior thingy, why hasn't he?"

Gaige's question made sense. Tannis shrugged. She'd just spent the last two hours explaining the Forerunner-Eridian relationship to the Vault Hunters and Dr. Halsey.

"He can't," Naomi surmised. They all looked at her.

"_Yes, of course!_" Dr. Halsey exclaimed. "_It takes at least 200 years to charge a Vault Key with enough energy naturally to open a Vault. The Vault Key Jack has in his possession was used just four years ago and he's had it in his possession for what, only two years? He must be trying to harness enough energy to force the time frame down. It's a difficult task. Nearly impossible without a strong enough catalyst._"

"_Like a Siren?_" Roland the AI cocked his head to the side. They all looked at him. Maya crossed her arms.

"Must be," she said. "Lilith can absorb eridium to increase her power, so it makes sense that a Siren would be able to convert and amplify the natural eridium radiation."

"Wait, if Jack's so hot to get Lilith, doesn't that mean he doesn't _have_ a Siren?" Axton pointed out.

"Explains why he's so hot to get her," Mal shrugged.

"Unless he does, but she's not strong enough," Siobhan said. "Lilith is the most powerful siren in the universe, according to Tannis."

"Yes, Lilith does possess an exponential amount of power," Tannis said.

"We could bait him," Maya said. "I could let him capture me, see if I can find where he's got the Vault Key."

Siobhan felt all eyes on her. Salvador's expression showed where he stood: a flat 'no,' somewhere near Mal's revulsion at the idea, Gaige looked about to protest, and even Axton looked slightly uneasy about it. Zero bowed his head slightly and looked over at her. Kelly glanced at Siobhan.

"It's up to you, Shy," Naomi said.

"It's not," Siobhan replied. "It's up to Maya. If that's what she thinks is necessary, why stop her? She's not a soldier under my command; I have no power to decide what she does."

"We can't send her in without back up," Salvador said.

"Zero, could you—" Gaige stopped when Zero started shaking his head.

"No," Zero said. "However, you could give her the digistruct module for Deathtrap."

"I could implant it in her arm or thigh or something," Gaige nodded. "Her limbs are big enough."

"How big is your active camo generator?" Maya asked.

"It needs a battery," Zero shook his head.

"_I could walk Gaige through rerouting the circuitry to run on the natural energy of a Siren,_" Dr. Halsey said. "_We might be able to cut it down, too. To get it to fit inside, say, a neural implant, which Maya's hair could cover._"

"_There is another way_," Angel's voice came over the room's speakers. She appeared as an icon on the corner of the screen, beside Dr. Halsey.

"Yeah?" Mal, like everyone else in the room, still didn't trust her. "How's that?"

"_You could ask._"

"Where's the Vault Key, then?" Siobhan asked.

"_I have it._"

(V)

PANDORA  
_Sanctuary_  
26.09.2559 (UNSC calendar)  
Gaige was sitting in one of the booths, back to the laughing Salvador and Mal, who were joking and making light of everything with Naomi, Tucker, Wash, North and a few of the Spartan IV's. She was picking at a piece of pizza, but wasn't really hungry. Suddenly, a hand appeared in her view, placing a mug on the table by her hand. She looked up and saw Axton coming to sit with her, his own beer in hand.

"Why can't I have one?" she asked. He chuckled and turned the bottle so she could see the label. "Oh, pop," Gaige giggled at his slightly thrown expression. "I call it 'pop'."

"I call it soda. New Yorker, y'know?"

"Are you really?"

"Nah," Axton chuckled. "No, I was born on Harvest but raised on Eridanus II. Left for the marines just before it was attacked."

"Wasn't it, um... glassed?" Gaige asked timidly. He nodded. "You have family, there?"

"Nope," Axton shook his head. "Lost all my family on Harvest. Mom, dad, sisters..." He sighed. "All I had left for a while was Sarah, but she died on Venezia. After that, I just kept my nose to the dirt."

"And then Freelancer."

"And then Freelancer. That's what we called it. Y'know, us grunts," he snorted. "ONI and the guys out of armor called it Project STATESIDE or Project MINUTEMAN, depending on whether they were an egghead or brass or if they were another Double-Oh-Ay guy."

"Double-Oh-Ay... that's 'Out of Armor,' right?"

"Yeah," Axton nodded, embarrassed that he'd forgotten she wasn't familiar with the same vernacular as he. "Sorry."

"It's ok. I'm smart. I figure things out," Gaige shrugged. She glanced at the mug and moved it closer, looking into it. Realizing what it was made her tear up a little.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

"Oh, nothing," Gaige rubbed at her eye with her right hand, wiping the tears away before they could make her makeup run. "I just... My dad used to make me hot cocoa all the time and he might be in jail because he helped me escape."

"Hey, if your dad's anything like his daughter, he'll be fine," Axton smiled. Gaige smiled back, managing to overcome the pang of sadness.

"Ok," Gaige cleared her throat and smoothed out her skirt. "Maya's twenty-seven. Salvador says he's thirty-two, Mal's thirty-nine. Kelly, Zero, Naomi and Siobhan are all forty-eight, but the ladies have spent so much time in cryo, they're more like actually thirty-eight and Zero's, like forty-two. How old are you?"

"I'm forty-one. But I've spent a lot of time in cryo, too. In terms of actual physical aging, I'm about thirty-five. Satisfactory?"

"Sure," Gaige shrugged. "And are you and Carolina still... y'know?"

"No," Axton frowned. "Gaige, where is this going...?"

"Nowhere...?"

"First thing they teach you in the military—well, actually the second thing—how to sniff out bullshit."

"What's the first thing?"

"Patience."

"Ok, you got me," Gaige blushed. "I like you."

"I know."

"So... If you're single...?"

"You're eighteen, Gaige."

"Almost nineteen!"

"I'm twenty-two years older than you."

"So..?"

"I could be your father."

"Except that you're not."

"Gaige, no."

"It's perfectly legal!" Gaige protested. Axton stood up and gave her a look. She'd seen that look before, from her father and mother alike. He wasn't going to carry on the conversation with her. She wouldn't be treated like a child. As he started to step away, she grabbed his wrist and pulled him back down, making him sit down with her again. "Look, Axton, I get it's weird for you, but I trust you. You've been just amazing to me this whole time... And don't you dare say you haven't flirted with me at least once! I know for a fact you didn't have to straighten my stance out with your hands the way you did, either."

Axton shifted uncomfortably. "I apologize for that."

"Oh, bullshit, Axton. Girls are pre-equipped with bullshit detectors. We don't need marine training for it," Gaige frowned. "What's the problem?"

"I can't right now, Gaige," Axton said. "I know I said I'm not with Carolina, but I'm not available right now."

"Well..." Gaige shrugged. "In that case... let me know when you are."

"...Okay."

(V)

PANDORA  
_The Highlands__  
_26.09.2559  
Gaige blinked awake and panicked for a second. While it was the first time she'd gotten really _restful_ sleep since she left home, she'd forgotten that she was on a UNSC aircraft headed off as a member of a small taskforce comprised mostly of UNSC personnel and ex-covert operatives. Names and faces lifted out of the back of her mind and she felt a little better, especially curled up against Axton's arm. She glanced around, seeing her friends all either napping, loading magazines or re-checking weapons. Maya was sitting on Gaige's other side, back to her as she conferred something with Salvador. Carolina and Rhode Island were further down, Wyoming and Maine across from them. Naomi lectured Tucker on his Energy Sword and battle rifle and Tucker tried not to flirt with her. There was one empty seat, across from Gaige, between Wash and Mal. She eased up and crossed over to the empty seat between Wash and Mal.

"Any idea how he lost his eye?" she whispered, nodding at Axton.

"Explosion," Wash said. "Tried to help another Freelancer out and got the shit end of the situation. Though, it could've been worse."

"Hey!" Grif called over his shoulder, back into the cabin. "We're touching down in ten."

"Everyone, grab your gear and get ready to step!" Kelly added.

"Zero and Maya, I want you two to head up north ways a bit. There's some cliffs, get up them and give me eyes," Siobhan began, her voice waking Axton up. He stirred silently, suddenly blinking awake. Gaige felt a little bad that he'd barely shut his eyes this whole time, all his free time seemingly tied up with making sure she didn't get herself killed. Siobhan continued, "North, you are to take Simmons out East and do the same. Mordecai's situated in the south west of our area."

"Copy that," North nodded.

"We'll be stepping out to meet Mordecai, first. He'll brief us on the compound an' our targets. There's a device we'll be retrieving that'll help Claptrap bypass the security around Angel's Bunker. Alpha Team will be after that," Siobhan said. "That's you, Axton, Carolina, Rhode Island, Gaige an' Wyoming. Bravo is me, Naomi an' Tucker. We'll be on an information run. Lookin' to find an' take whatever they've got on slag experimentation. Charlie'll be lead by Kelly and will consist of her, Wash, Maine, Krieg, Salvador, Mal, Donut an' Sarge. You're runnin' general interference. Causing explosions, killing experiments and the like. Are we all clear on our orders?"

"Ma'am, yes, ma'am," Tucker said. Siobhan nodded.

"Good."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Wildlife Exploitation Preserve_  
_The Highlands_  
26.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
"Change of plans," Siobhan frowned. "Mal, you're in charge of Charlie. Kelly, you and Wash are with Alpha."

"Ma'am," Kelly nodded. Axton felt a little more comfortable with Wash and Kelly alongside him, which surprised him a little, given his friendship and relationship with Rhode Island and Carolina, respectively.

"Ok, kids... let's go catch a bird," Axton sniffed. Mal led the group down the rocky little trail again. Charlie would be busting in the entrance and causing chaos, around which the other teams would slip. It was a simple enough plan and it went off without a hitch. Despite that, Axton felt something uncomfortable running down his spine. He didn't know what the feeling was stemming from, but he didn't feel right about the mission. They picked their way around the entrance to an enclosure, climbing the fence and strolling across.

"It's like old times, York," Carolina said. Axton chuckled.

"It is, isn't it?" he smiled at her, over his shoulder. She grinned back at him.

"Yeah, as long as I don't get hit by a car, I'm happy," Wash said.

"You've been hit by cars?" Kelly snorted.

"Chased by them, too," Wyoming snickered.

"Ok, I think we've got to go down, now," Gaige interrupted. Carolina vaulted down, somersaulting and landing elegantly. Kelly hopped down next and caught Gaige as she jumped down, setting her down.

"That was a hell of a drop," Kelly whistled. "Even for me."

"What? Is the Spartan scared of a little height?" Carolina snorted.

"I'm not overly fond of them," Kelly said. "But I've free fallen from orbit, so I've got every right to be."

Then they heard the snarl. A massive skag prowled out of its den, skin glistening with slag-induced armor plating. Flames began to lick and ripple along its body, seemingly generated by its flesh.

"That's... new," Wyoming said.

"Talk about a hot dog, right?" Wash snorted.

"Don't give him knock, knock joke fuel, Wash," Axton cautioned.

"Knock, knock," Wyoming smirked.

"Not the time," Kelly said, moving to meet the skag. Her shields sparked as she caught the clawed paws as they snapped down at her head. Jaws clamped open and shut inches in front of her nose. She tossed the skag, feeling that her arm was burned a little. The skag scampered back and Kelly danced forward, twisting and swinging her leg up. She smashed her heel down on its head, killing it instantly, the armor plates on her calves heating on the fire, but maintaining a cool internal temp, keeping her leg from roasting.

"Spartans: vicious, indestructible, invincible puppy kickers," Rhode Island scoffed. Kelly shot him a glare.

"Sorry to break it to you, but I'm not invincible," she said. "I'm just more badass than most of what we've encountered."

"Yeah, except your boyfriend who went over to the dark side," Carolina sneered.

"You're reminding me a lot of South right now," Wash told her, adding a glare to the comment. Carolina shrugged and turned to keep moving.

"Bloodwing should be on the other side of this building, according to Mordecai's map."

They encountered little threats along the way, but nothing serious... until the hallway that lead to Bloodwing's enclosure. There was all manner of tortured, slagged and mutated animals in there... but what frightened Kelly the most were the Sangheili, who looked and sounded like they'd lost their minds, clawing at the walls, snarling and roaring, trying to bash through the electrified shield that served as a gate.

"_You people just don't know when to give up?_" Jack snarled over their ECHO's.

"Soldier's Creed," Wash muttered. "'I will never quit.'"

"_How about your navy woman, then?_"

"I shouldn't have to tell you Spartans are willing to die for their mission," Kelly said. "With the amount of bullet scars on Krieg."

"_Well, you've finally put it together! Congratulations. Slow clap..._ _Anyway, I brought some friends for you, Kelly. Maybe some of them will remember what you've done to their brothers._"

The gates of the Sangheili cages opened. Axton tossed out the turret.

"Carolina, let's go!" he said, making the bottom fall out of Gaige's stomach and her heart take the express way down. "You can hold them off?" he added, to Kelly.

"Yeah, probably," Kelly shrugged, taking one of the Elites down with a perfect headshot. "Go."

Axton led Carolina off towards the new waypoint. Roland had been left in Siobhan's care, to facilitate the ease of her mission. But he must've hacked their HUD's through the ECHO.

"_Bloodwing's been moved,_" Roland the AI told them. "_Jack's done something to her... I can't get a good look, but it looks like it's going to be messy._""Got it," Axton said, picking up speed.

Carolina was right behind him.

(V)

"KA-FUCKIN'-BOOM!" Mal whooped as the crane exploded, the rig collapsing on a few robots, crushing them instantly. Salvador laughed madly as he finally got a turret on line, directing it towards a line of Hyperion security. Maine and Krieg were having a blast, jumping from soldier to robot, slashing and smashing. Sarge and Donut were lobbing grenades and shotgunning everything that crossed their path.

"I love this mission!" Salvador cackled. Mal laughed, grinning from ear-to-ear.

"Best orders ever!" he agreed.

(V)

It had gotten to be apparently obvious that not all the Sangheili were susceptible to bullets.

One of them had managed to break past the turret, which became distracted with other Sangheili, and had grabbed Kelly, hoisting her in the air above his head. He licked the inside of her thigh and nuzzled her groin, purring like an animal. Kelly put her legs around the Elite's neck, jerking herself out of its grip. The twist and grip of the movement snapped the Sangheili's neck, killing it instantly. Kelly righted herself and kept firing.

"They don't do that normally, do they?" Gaige chuckled.

"No, that one was a first."

(V)

"They look like they're having fun," Maya sighed, glaring through her scope. Zero reached over and gave her hand a gentle pat.

"Relax," he told her. "It's hard to shoot when you're distracted."

"You're going to let me shoot?"

"You think I'm shooting?" Zero snorted. "My weapon's not even loaded, Maya. I'm just using the scope to spot."

"Oh, wow..."

(V)

Axton didn't know what to make of it.

He knew what it was, sliding between his ribs, towards his back, on the left side. It was high up, just under his arm. The left lung was damaged, but not out of the equation. Blood filled his lung, coming back up with an exhalation and seeping deeper as he breathed in again. There was another one, cutting across his lower back as a boot stamped against his knees. He felt bone give, high in his left shin, cracking under the boot's pressure. The knife slipped out of his side and plunged in again, further across his back, close to center. It slipped out, bringing wet warmth with it. He fell back and hit the floor, staring, confused, up at the ceiling. Carolina... how had someone gotten past her...? Then he saw it was her, holding the bloodied knife and it made sense. Axton tipped his head back and tried to keep breathing for the little bit that he could. He'd bleed out, most of it in his chest. Not to mention, his heart had been nicked, so it would be a surprise if he stayed alive for more than a moment.

That damn left side...

"I got the commando," Carolina reported over her ECHO. "Do you want the Siren alive?"

"_She's no use to me._"

"Copy that, Command. Judas out."

"Bitch," Axton wheezed.

"You still alive?" Carolina kicked him in the face, putting his lights out, they both thought, for good.

(V)

"AXTON!" Gaige shrieked, scrambling to his side. "I don't see where he's hurt!"

"Stabbed in the back most likely," Kelly growled. "More way than one."

That was when Rhode Island pointed his rifle at Gaige and opened fire. Kelly lunged between them before the bullets fell. Unprotected by her Mjolnir, Kelly went down, trying to staunch the blood with her hand. Wash got a good shot in, but for naught. Rhode Island's shields were stronger. Wash took a shot to the shoulder. Wyoming and Rhode Island grappled for a second before Wyoming went down, a bloody gash from the gun butt to his forehead. He kicked Rhode Island's legs out from under him and slammed his heel down across Rhode Island's throat, effectively stunning him and pinning him down. Wyoming kicked him over and handcuffed him.

"Son of a bitch," Wash grunted,

"I don't have enough med vials," Gaige whispered. "And we used some when we were fighting the aliens."

"I'll be fine," Wyoming and Wash said at the same time. Gaige stabbed one into Kelly's leg and moved to use the other med vial on Axton. It didn't heal all the damage, but it stopped the bleeding and patched up his heart and lung. Axton moaned quietly, reaching the hand off his chest, for Gaige's hand.

"Thanks, kid," he murmured.

"Yeah, no problem," Gaige said. Kelly was back on her feet, rifle raised, ready to kill Rhode Island.

"ONI's problem," Wyoming put himself between Kelly and Rhode Island. "You can't kill him."

"Fuck ONI," Kelly spat and shoved him to the side. She bent down, picking Rhode Island up, rifle aimed seemingly lazily with the one hand. "Ok, fucker, what's your role in all this?" she asked. Rhode Island spat in her face. Kelly just reached up quickly, slamming him into the ceiling. "I'm using my nice voice. I wasn't trained to interrogate, just torture. So you're gonna tell me or I'll take you apart."

"I wanted your bounty," Rhode Island said. "You know how much you're worth? Shitloads of money! Probably more than your Mjolnir cost to make. More than you cost to make."

"I think you're full of shit," Kelly said, setting him back down. She lowered her rifle. "But I don't have time to deal with you, now..." Kelly stooped beside Axton. "Ok, Gaige, when you're rolling someone over to check out a back wound, you cross their ankles like this, put their arm at their side and raise the other one."

"Ok," Gaige nodded, following Kelly's hands with her gaze. The Spartan gently pushed Axton over, onto his front, to inspect his back.

"Two deep penetrating knife wounds," Kelly said. "One to the left lung, high, two inches under his armpit. The other, more towards the center of his back. It's a miracle it didn't puncture his heart."

"How do you know?" Gaige asked.

"He'd've been dead by the time we got here," Kelly said. "He still had a pulse, just barely. Judging by the pool of blood, he's been down for maybe two minutes. He's lucky Death Trap was able to hold off those Sangheili so easily."

"I'd almost think you're jealous," Gaige said, grinning. Kelly smiled back.

"Well, I've only ever fought fully armored Sangheili before. They seem easier to kill unarmored and unarmed," she replied, spraying a little latex skin over the now shallow wounds on his back. "He should be fine... Right now, we just have to worry about him going into shock."

"And you seem more worried about that?" Gaige frowned.

"Because now we have two people we have to carry," Wash said. "And my left arm's useless."

"We _need_ immediate med-evac," Kelly frowned. "I don't know how much internal bleeding there is. Zed's med doesn't take care of all that damage. And what you gave him wasn't enough."

"I'm the ranking officer here," Wyoming said. "Kelly, you and Gaige will press on and retrieve that device. If you come across Carolina, incapacitate her, but do not kill her. I will remain here with Wash and Death Trap, when he arrives. I'll watch over Axton. I've some medial knowledge, you know."

"If he dies, I'll kill you," Gaige promised.

"I'm sure you would," Wyoming said with a rueful smile.

* * *

AAAAAAAND... SCENE.

Ok, so yeah. Carolina's a baddo, now. I dunno, I never really liked her much and I could see how she could be a bad guy, easily. Meh, everyone has their reasons for doing things, good or evil, the reason itself is always straight forward and pure to the person committing the acts. Well, not always, but there's an exception to everything. Whatever.

SO, next time: Bloodwing, back to Sanctuary and... Maybe some Brick at the end. I dunno... We'll see.

Review, please~! Your reviews are going straight to the _Infinity _Crash Relief Fund~!

Lasky: What?! Fuck, no, stop it with that!

YOU AIN'T THE BOSS OF ME.

Lasky: STOP IT!

TIIIIINAAAAAA!

Tina: OOOH, SNAP, SON!

Lasky: **sighs** Ok. I give up.

Tina: But, shorty! The Soldier's Creeeeeeeed!

Lasky: I AM NOT A SOLDIER. I AM A SAILOR. AND I'M NOT ENLISTED, I'M A FREAKIN' OFFICER. Goddamn it, Tina!

...Someone's cranky.

Lasky: ... It's the water on this planet.

Ah, that makes so much sense, huh, Salvador?

Salvador: I don't know what you mean... OH! EXPLOOOSIONS! :D ~ 3

Lasky: ... Why me...?


	16. Chapter 11

Claptrap: New chapters of Krieg are available right here! :D

Well... that last one was... intense.

Axton: You killed me off!

You're still breathing! And I'd never kill you off. I brought you back to life, technically, for the sake of this story. ROOSTERTEETH killed York off! York being you!

Axton: Oh yeah... Damn creators.

Lol.

Lasky: Why is this man on my ship...? **points**

Zed: **performing "surgery" on a patient**

Medics: **cringing**

Palmer: Keep him away from Jun.

...Reasons.

Lasky: You are going to be the death of me.

...Nope. Not in this fic anyway (Lasky's scowls and suffers a minor eye twitch). 343 will, probably. Anyway, I don't own anyone you recognize!

Ah, this one's gonna be a really short one. I... Y'all know what happens in this one. I played Mordecai in Borderlands 1 up to level 64. I've got another one in his level 30's... I... I'm attached to Blood. And this one hurt. Enjoy.

* * *

CHAPTER ELEVEN

PANDORA  
_En-route to the _Infinity  
_The Highlands_  
26.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)Axton couldn't understand why Wash wasn't letting him so much as sit up. And why he was strapped in on a pelican, with only Wash and Rhode Island to keep him company.

"Where are we headed?" he asked. Wash glanced at him.

"Headed to the _Infinity,"_ Wash told him. "They've got their main power back, but none to the engines, so they're still grounded... But their infirmary is a hell of a lot cleaner than Zed's."

"They get anything in the air?"

"Two of their frigates, but they're using those for something Wyoming neglected to relay to me," Wash shrugged, then winced.

"Working on Hyperion," Wyoming called from the cockpit. "_Infinity_, this is Codename Wyoming. Requesting permission to land."

"_Wyoming this is the_ Infinity_. Come on down. Mind the massive heap of useless junk, though._"

Wyoming chuckled audibly. "Wyoming out."

"If they've got the power back on, engines must not be too far behind. Long range comms up?" Axton asked, feeling the pain in his back all of a sudden.

"They can't transmit anything that isn't through the ECHO frequencies," Wyoming said. "Or on the short-range radio. They can't even get to the _Queen's Bishop_ or the_ MacDuff_."

"Your ship?" Wash raised an eyebrow.

"Not really mine, but yes," Wyoming confirmed. "Easy now, chaps. It might be a little... bumpy."

Axton grunted, feeling pain shoot through his back from the jolt of the landing. "Son of a bitch!" he growled through clenched teeth. Wyoming came back out into the cabin, helping Axton up before leaving him in the wounded Wash's care and hauling Rhode Island out of his seat. He thrust the handcuffed ex-Freelancer forward.

"Move," Wyoming snarled. Rhode Island refused and earned a punch to the ear and another shove. This time, he trudged forward, Wyoming's hand on his collar. Axton was pleased to see they were in the _Infinity_'s hangar. Zed was standing with a few medics, saying something that made one of them laugh uneasily.

"Oh, fantastic, he's a double agent," Linda met them as they strode down the ramp. "The others are okay?"

"Kelly's fine," Axton said. "I think. Probably."

"It's Kelly, of course she's fine," Wash said. Linda pulled a face. She looked over at Wyoming.

"Mind if we borrow your pelican?"

"Go right ahead," Wyoming shrugged. "Think Lasky will mind if we borrow a prison cell?"

"Probably not," Linda shrugged. She looked over her shoulder and waved the rest of Blue Team over.

"Whoa, what's all that luggage for?" Axton asked, eyebrows raised.

"Oh, just a few change-of-clothes," Linda smiled, amused. "Some medical supplies, and some more guns."

"Any explosives?"

"Absolutely."

"You Spartans are the best."

"We were kind of built that way," Linda chuckled. "Anyway, you look pretty awful. Go get yourself patched up."

Axton let himself be led off towards the group of medics...and Zed.

"Why is he here?" Wash asked.

"He just kinda...showed up..." one of the medics replied.

"Sweet Jesus, I'm going to die..." Axton winced.

(V)

PANDORA  
_Bloodwing's Enclosure  
Wildlife Exploitation Preserve_  
26.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Kelly decided she hated birds. Bloodwing had her pinned down, having been morphed by Slag experimentation, and was trying to tear her in half. Kelly was only just managing to push away the fanged beak every time it came in for a bite. And Gaige couldn't help her...

Gaige screamed, hitting the wall as Carolina advanced. The ex-Freelancer made to kick her again, but Gaige curled around the leg this time, holding on for dear life. Carolina brought her other boot down, crashing the heel into Gaige's face. The teenager remembered something Axton had taught her. She brought her leg up tangling it around Carolina's free leg. She brought her other leg up and planted it behind Carolina's free heel. She twisted her hips, pulling her legs together and brought Carolina down. Gaige climbed on top of the Freelancer, punching her hard in the face with her left hand. Carolina was down for the count, nose broken and bleeding. Gaige took off her belt and tied Carolina's hands together behind her back, leaving her laid out on the concrete as she went to go help Kelly. A few rifle shots cracked into Bloodwing.

"_No! Don't kill her!"_ Mordecai shouted over the ECHO. The rifle shots stopped.

"_Oh, I should probably mention, I've given her a few more upgrades besides supersizing your McBloodwing," _Jack announced. "_She's the Avatar!_"

"What?" Kelly grunted, fighting off Bloodwing's beak again. "Fucking bird...!"

Fire surged along Bloodwings feathers, fur and scales, burning Kelly's arm and lower half.

"Gaige!" Kelly shouted. "Help!"

"I got you!" Gaige threw a grenade. It was the one Axton had handed her back in Sanctuary. Kelly hissed and turned, covering her face with one hand as the blindingly bright blue plasma exploded against Bloodwing's face. The massive avian creature took off, leaving Kelly a little singed on the ground. Kelly staggered to her feet. The fronts of her thighs were burned, and her belt had been mostly burnt away, leaving her hips bare and raw. "Under different circumstances, I'd say that would look good on you," Gaige said. Kelly gave her a puzzled glance, flicking her gaze back up at Bloodwing.

"I wish we'd been able to find some kind of..." Kelly paused. "Death Trap."

"What about him?"

"That little Electric surge he does. Think you can alter it to a volume more like a taser than electric death?" Kelly suggested.

"Yes!" Gaige said. She digistructed Death Trap and deactivated him, pulling him back under the little over hang, with Kelly, who stayed watching the skies as Bloodwing circled, a giant phoenix of death. Gaige worked quickly, but not quickly enough. "Buy me a minute or two?" Gaige asked as Bloodwing started breathing balls of fire down on them.

"I didn't train for this," Kelly grumbled as she lobbed a grenade up at Bloodwing, sprinting to the other side of the enclosure. The explosion drew the flaming avian's attention, but barely hurt her. Kelly dodged and leaped, tumbling and rolling away from every hurled attack. She nearly shit a brick, though, when the fire suddenly turned to acid. "What in the FUCK?!"

"_She does Fire! She does Acid! What'll Jack think up next?!_" Jack snickered.

"He's got slag and shock to go," Kelly muttered to herself. _And Slag won't really hurt me right away... but who knows what kind of long-term effects it'll have... _Kelly fired off a few rounds at Bloodwing. "Mordecai! Shoot your fucking bird!"

"_I only have one shot, Kelly! The acid will burn the tranq off!_"

Kelly growled and narrowly missed an acidic missile. The splash caught her across her back and she stumbled, falling to her hand. She'd forgotten how badly burned her left palm was and hissed in pain as she touched the concrete. "How about you, Gaige?"

"Working on it!"

Kelly lobbed another grenade and suddenly, it was electricity raining down on her. She dodged the lethal lightening as best she could, but she was getting tingles sparking up her legs as she moved. _Officially the _worst_ day ever. Of all time, _she thought to herself. She shot up at Bloodwing, startling the avian and sending it flying around in a wide arc, giving her a moment to catch her breath. "Mordecai, now?"

"_If I shoot her now, the fall will kill her!_"

"It's always something with you," Kelly huffed.

"_She's my best friend, Kelly. Even you can understand something like that."_

"Mordecai, you're not in the UNSC anymore. Stop being a dick to the Spartan," Gaige snapped. "It's throwing off my concentration."

"Gaige? You got any more of those plasma grenades?"

"No, sorry!"

"It's fine," Kelly scowled. "What I wouldn't give for a rocket launcher right now."

"_Don't you dare think about shooting my girl with a rocket launcher!"_

"It would just be to scare her," Kelly growled.

"I think I got it!" Gaige said. "Lemme know when she switches to another element!"

"Fuck!" Kelly yelped as a blob of slag splattered directly in front of her. She hopped back as another fell, feeling the purple matter splatter on the burned fronts of her thighs. "Ouch," she hissed. She managed to dodge the remainder of the splashes. Between Mordecai's tranq and Death Trap's tazer, Bloodwing came down. Kelly rolled out of the way as the massive avian crashed back down.

"Yes! It worked!" Gaige cheered.

"_Oh, wait... I think I forgot something..._" Kelly tensed up as Jack's voice came over the ECHO again. "_Fire, corrosive, shock, slag... Oh yeah! EXPLOSIVE!_"

Kelly tackled Gaige, knocking her flat on the concrete half a heartbeat before Bloodwing's head exploded, scattering burning tissue and skull. Kelly yanked the in-ear out as Mordecai's blood-curdling cry of horror was loud enough that she could hear it without the ECHO.

"_See, that's whatcha get when you mess with me. I hope you were watching, Rook. And you, too, Lasky. Keep that in mind when you think about fucking around with Hyperion._"

"_I'll kill you, pendejo! I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU, JACK!_"

Kelly straightened up, helping Gaige to her feet. Gaige limped over to Bloodwing's corpse and bent down, picking up the device. She looked at the small piece of metal and circuitry and felt the impulse to throw it. She restrained herself, though, and slipped it into her pocket.

"_SON OF A BITCH! I'LL KILL YOU, JACK!_"

"_Oh, boo hoo... Blake! Where's my violin!?_"

"_Good job, Kelly and Gaige_," Roland the human was on the ECHO now. "_Bring it on back_."

"_Grif, bring the pelican down_," Siobhan ordered over the ECHOs. "_All units, rendezvous at the LZ_."

"So, since the _Infinity's_ radio is back up," Gaige looked over her shoulder at Kelly. "Can Captain Lasky call the Elites for back up? Can they just come and burn the moon like they did all those planets?"

"It's a thought," Kelly said, picking Carolina up and tossing her over her shoulder. "A good thought."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Sanctuary_  
26.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
"Is Axton gonna be okay?" Gaige asked. Lieutenant Grayson scratched his head.

"_Yeah, of course. Given we keep this Dr. Zed character away from him. He's got tetanus stains on his shirt."_

"_Tetanus doesn't stain!_" Zed protested. "_This is brain fluid, anyway._"

"_Uh, yeah, Sergeant York will be fine._"

"Thank you, sir," Kelly said and closed the link. She looked at Gaige. "Happy?"

"Yes," Gaige said. "I probably should go see if Mordecai needs help with Claptrap's upgrade."

"No," Kelly said. "We're going to Marcus's range to practice your shooting."

"C'mon, really?"

"I'm gonna let you use a SPNKr."

"A what...?"

"A Rocket Launcher."

"Ooh! Do I get use the SAW, too?"

"Not yet."

"Aw, c'mon!"

(V)

PANDORA  
_Trainwreck Tundra  
The UNSC _Infinity  
26.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Carolina lifted her head slowly. It hurt. She heard the blood rushing through her ears and her vision was still slightly blurry. She looked around, trying to get her bearings. She was in some kind of interrogation room, strapped into a chair, with her hands cuffed just under the table in front of her, to the table. She couldn't move and she'd been stripped of everything. Literally, all she was wearing appeared to be a t-shirt likely belonging to a Spartan, given the size of it.

A man entered the room. She recognized him as he moved towards her. He scratched the corner of his lip deftly, mussing the neat mustache slightly. Wyoming folded his hands, looking at her sternly across the table. Another person entered the room as well, making a bit more noise. He slammed a data pad, the sound sudden and painful on Carolina's still aching head, making her flinch away from it, on the table and came to stand beside Wyoming.

"Charlotte Church," the man read. She slowly recognized him as Captain Lasky. He began reading from the data pad, seated on the corner of the table. "AKA Agent Carolina, more commonly known by just Carolina. Older sister of Raymond Church AKA Agent Raleigh, and half-sister of David Stark, AKA Agent Washington. I'm a little iffy on the details, what happened to Raleigh?"

She looked up at him, almost pleadingly.

"Just skip to the part with the firing squad. I'm not telling you anything," Carolina said with a sneer. Lasky sniffed.

"Well, our long-range comms are still down," Lasky shrugged. "Meaning, we can't tell Admiral Osman we found you. Also meaning, Admiral Osman can't tell us not to torture you and I've got people on the other side of that door who would _love_ to."

"Our dear Agent Washington included," Wyoming said, making Carolina shift uncomfortably. "I never knew Raleigh. What happened to him, clearly he was a Freelancer."

"He died," Carolina replied.

Wyoming sighed. "Ah, you see, he's listed as MIA in his file. It doesn't give any details as to the nature of his death, if he did indeed die. Part of my mission was to uncover the truth about Raleigh. Now, I'd like to know, how did he die?"

"He..." Carolina looked down. "Can I ask for a lawyer?"

"You can ask, but you're not getting one," Lasky replied. "The only lawyers on Pandora work for Hyperion. As you well know, that's just not possible for me to arrange."

"I won't tell you what happened to Raleigh, but I will tell you why I stabbed York," Carolina said.

"Please do."

"Jack has something I want. But I had to get rid of the Vault Hunters to get it. York—_Sergeant_ York was the easiest one, still trusting me and all," Carolina said.

"What is it Jack has that you want?" Wyoming asked.

"Information," Carolina said.

"I can get you information," Wyoming frowned. "What was he selling you information about?"

Carolina looked down at her knees. She wouldn't say anything. Lasky hopped off the table and shoved it back, against her arms, slamming her wrists into the bottom of the table, painfully.

"What was he selling you information about?" Lasky shouted the question, leaning his weight on the table and glaring down at her, forcing Carolina to look away again. "You answer the fucking question or I'll do more than jar your wrists! What information was he selling you!?"

"Where my mother and Raleigh are!" Carolina broke. "He told me my mother wasn't dead. And if that wasn't the last thing Raleigh told me before I lost contact with him, I wouldn't have paid Jack any mind. But he was gonna tell me where to find her, if I got rid of the Vault Hunters."

"And you thought you could take on the Vault Hunters?" Lasky snorted. "Every one of them but two, trained killers who could end you without breaking a sweat..."

"You'd be surprised what I'm capable of," Carolina glared. She nodded at the data pad. "You know who my father is? Leonard Church?"

"Crazy doctor, like Halsey," Lasky shrugged.

"Genius in the fields of AI Theory and Biotechnology," Wyoming added.

"Way more like Halsey than you know," Carolina glared up at him. "Raleigh and I weren't just his children... And Wash was lucky to have been raised by his mother."

"He... experimented on you...?" Wyoming pieced together.

"What the fuck," Lasky said. "What kind of parent could do that...?"

"That's not all," Carolina said. _What the hell...? It's not like Daddy Dearest can do anything about it anymore..._ "Leonard Church isn't his real name. He changed it when he turned eighteen."

"What was his real name?"

"Frederic Antoine LeFort," Carolina said. "And you might have to verify the truth of this, but I'm pretty sure he's a clone of Spartan 104."

"Son of a bitch..."

* * *

I'm no' gonna lie... that chapter sucked. But we got some answers, right? Right?

The reason Axton still needs medical: Because HALO is realistic, to a point. And sometimes Zed's Meds don't heal you all the way, so... he's still hurtin' and they're not sure how much internal damage was fixed and how much wasn't and so on.

You might have guessed by now, Fred-104 is my favorite Halo character. Although, I'm doing a lot with Kelly, so it might not be that obvious... I like her, too... But Fred's my favorite. :) Urm... His name's spelled the French way, so I'm guessing he's French. His middle name and last name are derived from "Anthony Stark," by the way. Antoine is the French spelling of Anthony and "Stark" means "Strong" in German. "Le Fort" means "The Strong" So.. yeah. Hey, I'm an Ironman fan! Don't hate!

Oh, hey, question, and PLEASE answer in the reviews:  
Musical number finale? Yes? No? Maybe? Requests...? Anyone want to see Spartans, Vault Hunters and ODST's singing "Don't Stop Believin'"? Lol... Quite frankly, I hate that song. So, lemme know! :D

Lasky: You're joking around, right? I mean, you're already putting me through Bunkers and Badasses.

Tina: WHAT?! THAT'S, LIKE, THE COOLESTEST GAME EVER!

Halsey: "Coolestest" isn't a real word, Tina.

Tina: YOU'RE NOT A REAL WORD, DR. MEAN LADY!

Lasky: ... that made literally _no_ sense.

Halsey: ...I hate people.

Ok, so tune in next time, y'all for Brick! And more questions, WTF's, Lasky and Spartan Badassness! Oh! And an old friend appears, also. :)


	17. Chapter 12

Claptrap: Greetings, Vault Hunters! There are new chapters available here!

So, this is gonna be a **_long_** one. I mean, fucking LONG. I really wanted to get to Brick this chapter, but that's why it's so long. Also, Tina happens in this chapter, and Lasky discovers something... shall we say, _interesting_.

Lasky: Not... exactly the word I'd use.

I know. :) Don't own anyone~ :)

* * *

CHAPTER TWELVE

PANDORA  
_UNSC_ Queen's Bishop_  
Planetary Orbit_  
27.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Rook felt a little bit of stress lift off his shoulders when they reestablished comms with the _Infinity_ and had found Sanctuary. "How's the weather down there, Captain Lasky?" Rook asked. Lasky offered an uneasy laugh.

"_Was that a joke, Captain Rook? _"

"Perhaps, Captain Lasky. Bring me up to speed."

_"It's hell. This planet? It's goddamn hell. No wonder it gave us such wonderful marines and ODST's over the years._"

"Was _that_ a joke, Captain Lasky?"

"_I wish it were. The whole planet is trying to kill us. There's these plants the locals call 'Fire Melons' that literally explode in napalm-y death on contact with anything._ _And there's these creatures called Varkids. The adults? You could put a saddle on them and ride them around. If they didn't, y'know, try to kill you._"

"Intriguing."

"_Also, Handsome Jack's found another Vault thing containing a massive war machine called 'The Warrior.' He's attempting to use a human catalyst, called a 'siren,' to charge this device, called 'the Vault Key,' with Eridium radiation. And our team, which has picked up a Siren and a teenage engineer, is trying to break into one of his secure facilities and steal the Vault Key and siren. Also, they picked up a few Freelancers on the way. Two of them turned out to be working for Jack, in exchange for information on the mother of one of these rogue Freelancers. Ah... And Staff Sergeant York was wounded. He's pretty much patched up, now, but... it was serious._"

"Is that all...?" Rook raised an eyebrow. It was a load of information to download, all at once, even for a Spartan.

"_No,_" Lasky continued. "_Th__at facility I mentioned... I've got my frigates in the air, but it'd be nice to have a really big orbital gun pointed at Jack's nuts anyway._"

"It'd be our pleasure," Rook said. "Sit rep up here is things are eerily quiet. Like he's holding his breath awaiting our team's next move before he does anything."

"_I can send a few up._"

"Pulling them off what duties?"

"_Blowing up factories._"

"That sounds incredibly productive."

"_Nah, the opposite. But that's the point._"

Both captains chuckled. "I wouldn't argue, as they're your ships to use as you please, but we managed to secure a few of Hyperion's ships. And I've been hailed by a man named 'Mr. Torgue', who apparently intends to assist us."

"_Torgue, huh? He makes good rocket launchers. And great grenades... Take what you can get from him. It's a good thing he wants to help._"

"Agreed," Rook replied.

"Sir, we've been hailed again. Ah, and again..."

"Sir, there's another nine ships appearing in range... No, it's fifteen. Nineteen..."

"Answer in order. I'll get back to you, Captain Lasky._ Queen's Bishop _out," Rook ended the call and looked back up at the main screen. "This is Captain Charles Rook of the UNSC _Queen's Bishop_. To whom am I speaking?"

"_Well, hi there, Captain Rook_," the speaker was a woman and her image appeared on-screen presently. She was in her early forties and wore a Stetson, set neatly on a cascade of dirty-blonde curls, and a dark red-button down blouse with gold designs. "_I'm Jessie Jakobs... And _I_ hear you're takin' on Handsome Jack. I want in. We can provide your snipers with the best rifles known to man. It'll be like a turkey shoot with those yella' bellies._"

"Thank you for the offer. More guns are always appreciated. But this is a military operation..."

"_Oh, sugar, don't bullshit me. Torgue's here._"

"Fine. But I'll tell you what I told him," Rook sighed. "It's best you stay out of our line of fire. MAC cannons are unforgiving."

"_One shot, a thousand kills. I like it. I'm yours to command, darlin'._"

"Thank you, ma'am," Rook closed the link. "Next."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Sanctuary_  
27.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
"How?!"

"_Lots of people hate Jack,_" Palmer shrugged. "_And I can't say I don't understand where they're coming from. For Atlas, Valdof, Tediore, Dahl, Maliwan... It's all about money. Jakobs has a personal problem with Hyperion, though. Torgue just wants to blow shit up and S&S is just here for the hell of it._"

"S&S always made pretty awesome pistols and snipers," Mordecai pointed out. "I say it's all good that they're here."

"_Oh, no, Captain Lasky and Captain Rook are all for them being here... S&S makes our SMG's, anyway..._"

"All of a sudden, though?" Lilith raised an eyebrow. "Makes me think they're all here for the money."

"_No, that's not it,_" Palmer shook her head. "_Apparently, Hyperion's been pulling resources from all over the galaxy to come here, since we arrived. Torgue was already on his way to join you guys for the fight, since apparently corporate war is more fun when done with actual explosives and casualties. The other companies pulled ships on the nearby planets and sent them our way to see what kind of trouble whom was giving Jack that required a massive fleet._"

"We're fucked, aren't we?" Mordecai winced.

"_Pretty much. I mean, we've got seventeen ships—two were captured from Hyperion. Torgue brought thirteen, Jakobs sent six, S&S brought two, Maliwan sent three, Vladof sent one, Dahl sent four, Tediore sent three... Atlas could only afford one and it's half the size of one of our strident frigates... From what Torgue told us, that's not gonna be enough. If we had _Infinity_ in the air,_ _it'd be a different story, though._"

"Would it?" Mordecai frowned. "I mean, she's a big girl, but would it matter?"

"_It'd help._"

"Enough?"

"_We don't know how many ships Hyperion's got on its way. Or what the specs are." _

_"_Right...If it's even a hundred Covenant-based ships, even with what we've got in the air, we might as well put our heads between our legs and kiss our asses goodbye," Mordecai sighed.

"_Not necessarily_," Palmer said. "_Jack doesn't fight like __the Covenant. His ships move in a structured formation, they form patterns, become predictable. The Covenant didn't do that. They'd just go and destroy. That said, it's still not _not_ a threat_."

"And if they start glassing while they're fighting you, they'll destroy the _Infinity_ and kill us all."

"_Exactly_."

Lilith chewed her lip and looked up as Roland walked in, DeMarco in tow. "Status update?" he asked.

"We're fucked," Mordecai replied. "Royally. Jack's got a fleet coming in of unknown size and specifications and we've got fifty ships in-air. Roland, I don't know what you know about the Covenant, but if Jack's got more of their ships, even just, like five, we're done."

"Why?" Roland frowned.

"They've got these massive plasma burners," DeMarco explained, tone low and dark. "They use them to just melt the surface of a planet to just ash and glass."

"We get one of those above us, we're done," Mordecai said. "No escape."

"Are our long-range comms still working?" Roland asked.

"Destroyed when I displaced Sanctuary," Lilith shook her head.

"So we can't call the UNSC for back-up either," DeMarco huffed. "Fuck... Die one way or another..."

"_What was that, Spartan?_" Palmer demanded from the other end of the comms.

"Nothing, ma'am," DeMarco replied.

"_What I thought, Spartan._"

"Hang on," Mordecai said. "Are those re-fitted Covenant ships or did Jack build his own?"

"_The ones we've got... One's refitted and the other is Hyperion._"

"The re-fitted ship... They had some kind of long-range communication, memory serving," Mordecai searched his memory for the details. It had been some time since he'd had to bother with the Covenant. He was rusty. "Can the crew get a message to... Sangheilios? Ask them for help?"

"_Um... It's worth a try, I guess,_" Palmer was taken aback. "_Ah... I'd pay to see the look on Jack's face with some real Sangheili warriors shredding through his ships and men._"

"You and everyone else on this planet who knows what a Sangheili is," Mordecai smirked. "Oh, and we could probably use the same system to get in contact with the UNSC, too. Ask for _their_ help, too."

"_I'll get right to that. _Infinity_ out._"

"Am I awesome or what?" Mordecai held up his hands. Lilith grinned. DeMarco laughed.

"If this works, I'll buy you as many drinks as you want, when it's over," DeMarco said. Mordecai chuckled.

(V)

PANDORA  
_Trainwreck Tundra  
The UNSC _Infinity  
27.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
"_Laskyyyyy! LaskyLaskyLasky! laaaaaaaaaskeeeeeeeh..._"

Lasky had half a mind to demand Tina be muted. But the teenager had done enough for them, scraping bandits off the outskirts of his camp with some well-aimed missiles that he didn't have the slightest urge to question the origin of, donating munitions, giving some of his men some scrapped-together V-Gear, as she called it, that would allow them to open ammunition caches and weapons stores planet-wide for more Pandoran weaponry, as well as providing them with information on the creatures of Pandora, especially their weaknesses.

So he answered the call. "What can I do for you, Tina?"

"_I needs some stuff to get done, son. Ooh! Hey, I made a rhyme! Wut, wut!_"

"What do you need to get done?"

"_I'm havin' an important tea party and I needs some help getting all the guesties to arrive!_"

"You can give me the names and I'll ECHO them for you..."

"_Naaaah, shawty. You needs to go get them personally._"

"Alright, then. Where can I find them?"

"_Okay, first thing, my date! He's MISSING! AND I AM NOT GOING STAG, DON'T EVEN SUGGEST IT!"_

"Name, Tina! Name!"

"_His name is Sir Reginald Von Bartlesby, a local aristocrat and purveyor of the fine arts. I believe his _mother_ has forbidden him from speaking with me_. _You will convince her to... release him into my custody,_" Tina explained. Lasky almost sighed, realizing he was getting into something slightly annoying. Palmer seemed amused, slouching against the holo table, beside him.

"I don't wanna ask you to do this, but I can't... Brief a team of marines on this, either," Lasky said, looking at Palmer. She chuckled.

"I wanted to stretch my legs anyhow," she said. "And test out those Torgue, S&S, and Maliwan shipments Marcus's deliverymen brought."

"Ah, screw it," Lasky said. "I'm going with you."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Sanctuary_  
27.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Gaige was frustrated, trying and failing to so much as brush her knuckles against Zero's arm.

"Damn it, Zero! Stay still!" Gaige snapped.

"You took out Carolina and you can't even knick me," Zero shook his head, flashing her a frowny face on his visor. "C'mon, Gaige. You know what this is really about."

Gaige clubbed Zero in the chest, knocking him back a pace. He retaliated this time, bringing his leg up and around in a neat roundhouse. Gaige cried out, hitting the wall and falling flat on her chest. She pushed herself up and rushed Zero. He stepped to the side, planting both heels of his hands against her back. She hit the hard floor again, rolling around to avoid a harsh kick. Then Gaige got the point.

"Maya!"

Zero's leg swung up, flipping him around. Maya released his leg and tried to phase lock his head, but he tumbled to the side, the spark fizzling out where his head had been.

"Mal! Pin his ass down!" Gaige demanded. Mal pointed his rifle at Zero and fired a short burst. Zero hopped to the side, away from the rifle's line of fire. It twitched to the side, following him. "Maya!"

Zero squirmed as he was hoisted into the air. Gaige moved too late when he opened fire with his pistols.

"Even in the air, I fight/Danger is all around in battle/Keep your eyes open," Zero cautioned. A triple shot from Mal sparked Zero's shields.

"True, but you're also exposed," Mal pointed out. "That said, you could shoot over Maya's cover, get a better vantage point on the rest of us... You get the picture, Gaige?"

"Yeah," Gaige nodded. "Why're you guys teaching me tactics like this?"

"You're running around with two ODST's, two ex-special ops guys, a marine and three Spartans, four if you count Zero," Mal said. "Problem is, we've been having to watch your asses for you, both of you. We want you to get an idea of what we're thinking. To learn some strategy, so you can cover your own asses if we can't."

"And so we can be more effective," Zero said. "The raid on Jack's bunker is going to be very different from what we've done before. It'll be all tight corners and narrow passages. You two need to know how to maneuver with the units going in there."

"Units? It's not just going to be us?"

"No," Mal shook his head. He waved them over and dropped a holo-map on the floor, showing them the aerial view of Jack's bunker. "We'll be bringing up a ground unit this way, mixed Marines and Raiders' allies. Then we're getting ODST's and Spartan IV's about here... The Marines and Raiders will push up the hill and hold the hill and the fort with half the IV's and Troopers. The rest of the IV's and ODST's are pushing on this pass, with us. We'll have air support throughout; Falcons, Hornets, and I think I heard something about a frigate."

"What's so good about air support?" Gaige asked.

"Exactly what I proved with the return fire in the air," Zero said. "People shooting at you from the ground and from the air is confusing. Also, stuff coming from the sky is harder to avoid."

"Which is one of the things that makes ODST's so effective," Mal chuckled.

"Exactly," Zero agreed. "By the way, it's Kelly's say that's keeping you, Gaige, on this. And mine keeping Maya. Lilith and Roland want to send you in, but Siobhan and Lasky don't think this is any place for civilians."

"I'm not..." Gaige paused. "Oh, I guess I am."

"Yeah, you are," Mal chuckled. "Doesn't mean you're not a damn good fighter, though, sweet-'art."

"Aw, thanks Mal."

(V)

"There's a part two."

"Aside from patching up your relationship with the berserker because you threw him out?" Naomi raised an eyebrow. Roland nodded. Roland was briefing Siobhan, Zero and Naomi on their mission in the HQ office.

Siobhan suppressed the sigh fighting its way out of her lungs. "Fine," she said. "What is it?"

Roland turned to the holo table. "This is the aerial scan of Jack's bunker, thanks to the _Queen's Bishop_. Angel informed me that there's a security access door that will only open for Jack."

"That right?" Naomi snorted. "I'm willing to bet it'll open for twenty ounces of C-12 or a Spartan Laser."

"_It's got shielding and is made of a similar titanium alloy to the stuff your Mjolnir is made out of,_" Angel explained over the ECHO.

"The C-12 and-or Spartan Laser will work just fine," Naomi muttered. "What do we have to do?"

"Go to Opportunity, find one of Jack's body doubles, kill him, and steal his voice modulator," Roland said.

"Easy enough," Zero shrugged. "Any one of the three of us could handle that on our own."

"Place is crawling with Surveyors and Loaders," DeMarco said. "It'll be a bitch getting in and a skag-den full of suck getting out."

"Sounds like fun," Naomi said.

"Depends on your definition," Mordecai shrugged. "Now, Lilly and I also want you to film these assholes causing you hurt and post it on the ECHO net. Propaganda, y'know, that sort of thing. It'll also ping on ONI's radar, given that you're Spartans, and they'll pay us some attention."

"We taking the non-personnel with us?" Naomi asked.

"No," Siobhan shook her head. "Just you, me an' Blue Team."

"Oh, it'll be just like the old days," Naomi sighed happily. "Except no Kurt or John or Mendez."

"Hopefully," Zero added.

(V)

PANDORA  
_Planetary Orbit_  
_Hyperion Moonbase_  
27.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
"Are you shitting me?!" Jack snapped. He threw something across the room. Athena didn't take the time to look and see what it was. She ducked and ignored the sound of it shattering on the wall behind her, before straightening back up.

"Jack, you've still got a bigger fleet," she reminded him. "And Atlas and Tediore will open fire on the others at a word."

"Too bad Torgue's here," Jack said. "I'm gonna hate killing that muscle-bound moron. I kinda liked him. Almost sold me his company for thirty bucks, a stick of gum and a high-five. Did I tell you about that?"

"No..."

"Well, I missed when I was giving him the high-five so he refused to sell," Jack shrugged.

"How..." Athena caught herself before she asked. Jack was bat shit crazy and she was more aware of this than most. Asking a stupid question was bound to get her head taken off by some random flying object. "Oh, never mind."

"How what?"

"How about I go down and take care of this myself?" she offered, immediately wishing she hadn't. It had been years since she had sparred with another Spartan, and she'd never sparred with a Spartan II before. She had no idea how much _better_ they really were than her. It might be instant death for her.

"Can you handle three of them?" Jack snorted. Athena shrugged.

"Why not?" she said. "They're old and battered. I'm not."

"I'd hate to see you dead, sweet cheeks," Jack said. Athena shrugged.

"You'll be long gone by the time I die, Jack," Athena replied. "Spartans don't, remember?"

"And you and I both know that's bullshit, honey."

"Yes, of course," Athena smiled bitterly. "See you soon, Jack."

"Bring me back their heads! Doesn't have to be on a silver platter..."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Trainwreck Tundra  
The "Skittering Mound"_  
27.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
"I definitely need to get out into the field more often," Lasky grumbled, wiping Varkid guts off his breastplate.

"Deskwork not your style, sir?" one of the marines, Teller, asked.

"Nope," Lasky said, helping another marine, Munson, up. "I kinda like getting my hands dirty, from time to time."

"Never heard that out of an officer before, sir," the third marine, Trager, said. Recently recuperated (thanks to Zed) Jun straightened up.

"Objective's just on top of the rise, sir," he said.

"Let's get this von Bartlesby guy," Palmer answered.

Wyoming led them up the rise, his sniper rifle coming back out, over the pistol. "Oh my," he murmured. "That's a rather large Varkid..."

"Swell," Lasky sighed, charging a fresh round into the chamber of his shotgun.

"_Please excuse Madame von Bartlesby's disposition_," Tina said over the ECHO. "_She's Welsh_."

They dispatched Madame von Bartlesby easily and all fanned out, searching for Reginald. Of course, they were expecting a human. What Lasky found at the waypoint, however, was a tiny Varkid in a jar that was dressed in a top hat, mustache and monocle; that is, the _Jar_, not the Varkid. "Nope, nope... not surprised. This _is_ Tiny Tina we're doing for," he resisted the urge to face-palm.

"_Yaaaaaay! Lasky! You're my fav'rite! You found Sir Reginald! Now all you gots to do is find Princess Fluffybutt and grab some crumpets and a teapot! Or you can just blow up some buzzards and bring me the scrap metal. That'll be the flamey bits when you blow it up. Not the meaty flamey bits, but the metal flamey bits._"

"Crumpets and scrap, got it," Teller scratched his neck, giving Lasky a look. Lasky shrugged and gave him an apologetic glance. Teller looked down respectfully.

"Crumpets?" Trager raised an eyebrow. "Where?"

"Map's showing out there, in the compound," Palmer said.

"Marines, you're going with Lieutenant Baker and Jun. Try not to get blown up," Lasky said. "Or ruin the crumpets and teapot."

"Yessir," Teller said. They headed off and Lasky re-loaded his shotgun.

"And we're going after Princess Fluffybutt?" Palmer asked, instantly regretting saying it. Lasky smiled.

"Yep. Bet you wished you didn't say her name out loud."

"It's probably a screw with fairy wings taped to it, so... yeah, kinda," Palmer shrugged. Lasky laughed and they headed back down the hill.

(V)

PANDORA  
_UNSC_ Queen's Bishop_  
Planetary Orbit_  
27.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Rook waited for thirty seconds. There was no image and the sound was punctuated by quiet static. He was almost concerned the link had broken and almost asked Dante to double check it when he received the reply.

"_We have... located this planet of yours. I have few ships to spare, as the UNSC is aware. But I do not forget my friends and many are in peril on this... _Pandora," the Arbiter finally came through, the grainy sound in the audio doing nothing to hide his veiled rage. Rook felt a sort of relief, hearing that anger in the Arbiter's voice. An angry Sangheili was one of the best weapons to come by, he knew from experience. They were only outclassed by battleships of the _Queen_ or _Infinity's_ magnitude, or a berserking Spartan. And an angry Thel 'Vadam seemed to be a slightly more dangerous weapon than your garden variety Elite, given his lack of reservation for breaking from Sangheili tradition. But it was the slight surprise and reservation that puzzled him. Until he remembered the Forerunner artifact presence on the planet.

"So you're coming?"

"_I would not miss this _Handsome Jack's _death_ _if the Gods themselves presented barrier to me. Of course I'm coming._"

"Great. Lasky's going to be thrilled to hear it. Rook out."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Sanctuary_  
27.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
"Almost makes you wonder..." DeMarco began. Mordecai raised an eyebrow slowly.

"What?"

"Every other planet in this system got glassed. Except Pandora. Think the Covvies knew about the Vault?"

"Safe bet," Mordecai shrugged. Then something Tannis had brought up came to mind. "Or maybe something else. Rook said the Arbiter was pretty surprised to hear the coordinates, like he didn't believe it."

"So what does he know about this planet that we don't?" DeMarco asked.

"Or maybe we _do_ know, but we don't know what we're looking at," Mordecai said. "Maybe there's something Forerunner and big here."

"If there's two Vaults, there might be more," DeMarco said.

"I'll have Tannis take another look, if you can tell me what to tell her to look for," Mordecai said. "I didn't deal so much with the Forerunners back in the day. Everything I know is stuff I picked up in conversation."

"Might as well suggest Halsey and Jul have a look. He probably knows something," DeMarco said. Mordecai nodded.

"Okay, here, you talk to Tannis and I'll drop the suggestion to Lasky."

"Alright," DeMarco tipped his chin up in an affirming nod and they parted ways.

(V)

SANGHEILIOS  
_State of Vadam_  
_The Arbiter's Keep  
_27.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
V'Erne 'Mdama was a close friend of the Arbiter's. He and his brother had fought for hours over years over it (before his disappearance), Jul thinking it improper for such a tight brotherhood with the _Traitor_. But V'Erne shared Thel's appreciation of the humans. The awe of their resilience and determination. And the same exasperation for their endless drive for bloodshed. Thel often teased him, saying he should've been a poet, not a warrior, but V'Erne always replied with a shrug and imitation of their "smile," which annoyed Thel at first, but became a point of common amusement later.

"Brother?" V'Erne asked, cocking his head to the side as Thel closed the gap to meet him.

"Friends of mine are absent options and stranded with an exceptionally uncompromising enemy," the Arbiter stated, his irritation evident.

"We are their only option," V'Erne scoffed. "Human friends?"

"Indeed," the Arbiter replied.

"When do we take leave?"

"You do not," Thel said.

"Why not?" V'Erne scowled.

"Your brother is there. I do not wish to cause your family further disgrace."

"His absence makes him removed," V'Erne hissed. "No longer family. His blood is taint in his veins."

"Still, you do not come."

"I shall."

"Shan't," the Arbiter replied, his own hiss expressing the finality of the matter. "Besides..." his tone softened slightly. "I need to know someone on Sangheilios, who is not my wife, still has their head about them, while I am gone."

V'Erne sighed and crossed his arms. "Fair."

"I am glad."

"Shall your destruction of this foe be swift and glorious."

"Swift yes," the Arbiter said, giving V'Erne a mockery of a human smile. "But not glorious. Merely brutal, bloody and full of vengeance"

(V)

PANDORA  
_Sanctuary  
_27.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
"This is so uncomfortable!" Maya complained.

"You get used to it, chica," Salvador shrugged.

"It's heavy," Gaige pouted as Axton finished clipping the breastplate on.

"It's armor," Axton replied.

"Carolina digging into York's back was the last bleeding straw. We're not playing Vault Hunter anymore, Gaige. And you've got to armor up with the rest of us," Mal said. Gaige was a little taken-aback by Mal's use of Axton's surname. He'd always used Axton's first name. She supposed it was because of the altered air—that they were no longer playing by the Raider's rules of engagement and were now using their own militarized versions of the same.

"Let's go," Salvador said when he and Axton finished checking Gaige's straps. Mal checked Axton while Axton checked Salvador. Salvador tightened a strap on Mal's thigh, giving the armor on his leg a hard slap when he'd fixed it.

Axton led the group from the room, up the stairs to the meeting room.

Gaige's jaw dropped and she heard Maya's audible sucking in of breath when they saw the Spartans in armor for the first time.

Madsen, in full plates, was impressive. He had the heroic look Spartan IV's were advertised with. He was the perfect poster child for the Spartans, all shiny metal and matte alloy suit. The sniper across his back completed the look perfectly, underscoring what the armor said loud and clear in bolded caps—that he was a trained killer.

Zero, while he hadn't "passed" the augments, was wearing a modified suit of Mjolnir. It was an ONI matte-black set with a matte version of his helmet. He was in the midst of putting back together his spotless sniper rifle, slouched against the wall, when Maya and Gaige came in.

Naomi had her helmet off, the hunk of metal and tech hanging from a mag-clip off her hip. The dark red and blue plates had stripes of crimson painted on them and looked like something of myth and legend. Her armor, like Zero's, was new-looking. But hers appeared to be just better-kept on second glance—his was new, though. She, herself, seemed to have a different air about her. It was cooler, but tensed. Ready to blow a concentrated jet of pain into the nearest target.

Siobhan had her wide-visored helmet tucked under arm. Her black and green plated armor had seen some mileage and appeared to be slightly less well-kept than Naomi's. Like her slightly taller sister, she had a more tensed air about her, but it was half-hidden by blank calm. Like watching a crocodile, coiled to spring, just under the stilled surface of a pond or lake.

Kelly, in her battered Army Green Mjolnir, looked the scariest of all. That amber visor seemed to be colder and more ruthless than even Zero's solid black, empty, faceless visor. The armor had obviously seen mileage—lots of it. It wasn't hard to imagine alien blood ground and drying deep in the nicks and scores littering the green surface with their little silvery flecks. The "087," emblazoned on the left breast in white paint, seemed to emphasize the inhumanity of the armor itself. She was no longer their friend, but a cold, mechanical killing machine. A tank with legs. A weapon. No more human than the pistol in the holster on Maya's thigh. Like this, Kelly was a stranger. A Spartan. Gaige understood, finally, why Salvador and Mal had talked about Spartans being so alien, even amongst their fellow soldiers. Kelly looked the part more so than the rest of them.

Kelly removed her helmet. But even with the removal of her helmet, she still wasn't the same person Gaige had grown attached to. She was still little more than a weapon.

Tannis cleared her throat and broke the spell of awe. "These areas are hot-spots for Eridian artifacts," Tannis dove right into it as the group crowded around. She highlighted the areas in question on the holomap. "This one here is especially interesting. The energy began to flare up right after your arrival here."

"Weird," Naomi said.

"Maybe it sensed the Forerunner tech in the _Infinity_," Siobhan shrugged. "Kelly, you'll be taking Mal, Gaige, Maya and Salvador to investigate this location."

"And you're taking my kids to go get the Hyperion douchebag impersonator," Kelly sighed. Siobhan gave her a small smile.

"They'll behave," she said.

"They'd better," Kelly smiled back.

(V)

PANDORA  
_Trainwreck Tundra  
__Tina's Workshop_  
27.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Lasky and Palmer had sent the marines, Baker and Jun back to the _Infinity_, while they brought the two "guests," the china tea pot Jun had found and the crumpets to Tina.

"We found you an actual tea pot," Lasky said, presenting her the shockingly intact white china pot with beautiful gold-leaf designs.

"Oooh, it's purdy," Tina said and set it on the table. She waved her hand at the table. "Cappy, would you mind setting up our guests while Lady Palmer of Spartantown helps me with some feminine details?"

"Uh, sure?" Lasky said. He noted the place cards and set Sir Reginald and Princess Fluffybutt at their appropriate locations. He saw that Tina's place setting declared her 'Lady Tina of Blowupyofaceheim.' But the one that caught his attention was the seat at the head of the table. It was a rather elaborate chair hooked up to a... He traced the paths of the cables with his eyes and saw they connected to a generator. The chair was an _electric chair_, an archaic instrument of execution. His stomach sank. Tina was asking him to help her commit murder... of this _Fleshstick_ man.

He looked up, hearing Tina's workshop door grate open. Tina was dressed in a dirty ball gown, her hair twisted up into an insane... something, with her psycho mask perched on top. She skipped over and examined the table. She was made-up, too, properly, at least. Lasky looked at Palmer, who shrugged.

"Oh, it looks simply _fabulous_, Lasky-saaaan!" Tina sang. "Oooone last thing, though... I wonder if you guys can bring Fleshstick here, too? Just get him through the door and I'll take care of the rest."

"Tina, if you're going to murder him, I can't agree to that," Lasky frowned.

"He... deserves worse than death, Captain," Tina told him, seriousness drowning the cute, yet insane girliness he was familiar with. "He's done a lot of bad stuff. Like, almost as bad as Jack."

"Fine, we'll help," Palmer said. Lasky began to protest, but Palmer picked up the placecard. She showed the other side to him, the side facing the seat.

"Okay," Lasky said, subdued by the text.

"Great! He's juuuuust around the corner."

The card read: _Fleshstick, the Evil Bastard Who Killed My Parents._

(V)

PANDORA  
_The Highlands_  
_Thousand Cuts_  
27.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Gaige was a little terrified of the Falcon at first, what with it being a lot smaller and a lot more open than a Pelican. Even though she was suited up, like Maya and Krieg and Salvador, in Marine armor, she felt exposed and she didn't like it. She didn't like Axton being back so soon, either. It wasn't that she wasn't pleased to see him—she was ecstatic to see him—but she didn't think someone who'd been so injured should be back in the fight so soon.

Wash, North, Simmons, Madsen and Tucker were following them up in another Falcon. The Freelancers and Tucker had replaced their Minuteman armor with the muted blacks and greys of ODST armor. Madsen was kitted out in his full Mjolnir get up, like Kelly. Simmons wore Marine armor, from what Gaige had seen. Everyone had a PSG—the finest they could find.

It was supposed to be easy. There was a network of tunnels Tannis had shown them on their maps that would lead them right to the chamber with the higher energy signature. That one was further away from the Slab compound and less-likely to yield trouble with them.

Kelly and North managed to settle the Falcons down neatly on a tight little opening outside the entrance to the tunnel. Kelly was on point. They followed her in, the only illumination the small lights on her armor and the flashlights zip-tied to the barrels of most of the guns, except for Mal, Axton and Kelly's. Mal had explained that the VISR system in his helmet lit up potential targets for him, so an actual flashlight on his rifle was redundant. Kelly, he continued to explain, was a Spartan. She had perfect vision in all lighting and the lighting filters in her helmet would alter accordingly.

For what felt like hours, it was dead silent and there was no sign of any sort of hostile, aside from a spider here and there, which was ignored or crushed with a gun butt.

Then they had movement. It was a little flicker on the radar in the corner of Gaige's visor. Little grey chevrons on the pinging gold semi-circle. She almost bumped into Axton as they halted. The main group stayed behind, waiting, as Kelly darted forward, impossibly silent in her hunter green titan armor.

What Kelly saw was a disconcertingly familiar potential enemy. The Sentinel floated lazily towards her, disregarding the assault rifle pointed at it. It appeared to scan her and turned, drifting a few meters then pausing and turning, as if expecting her to follow it. Kelly sent Axton and Mal a double green light flash, then a yellow. They moved the group forward, cautious.

The Sentinel led them into a tunnel, lit a bright blue and purple with natural florescence

"Tannis didn't say anything about those floaty things," Gaige said.

"That's a Sentinel," Axton told her. "It's a Forerunner construct."

"What's it do?" Gaige asked.

"Kills, usually," Kelly replied. "Apparently they guide, too."

The tunnel fed into a massive chamber that looked man-made or... at least made by something other than nature. It was lit by the same natural fluorescence as the tunnels. There was a singular pillar in the center of the room, reaching straight up, from a pedestal. A few other Sentinels floated around, about halfway up the pillar.

"On your guard," Axton whispered.

"_Reclaimer!_"

Rifles swung up, pointing at the sphere as it shot down from the top of the pillar, hovering around Kelly. It came to stop in front of her.

"_Reclaimer?_ _And is that a siren?_"

"Oracle...?" Kelly recalled John's stories of his travails on the Halos. The Oracle zipped back and up a few meters then bobbed back down.

"_Reclaimer and Siren, I insist you both come with me!_"

"Why?" Kelly asked.

"_My Master has something to show you both._"

"Your master...?"

"_He is a Forerunner, as humans call him. He has requested for the Siren and you, specifically, Reclaimer. Spartan 087, he said.__ This is you, is it not?_"

"Sure. Why doesn't he come out himself, though?"

"_My Master is unable to travel from where he rests._"

"Lead away," Mal said.

"_Only the Reclaimer and the Siren may accompany me_," the Oracle seemed annoyed.

"Ok, fine..." Mal frowned.

"_Please! Make yourselves at home!_" the Oracle chirped. "_This way, Reclaimer!_"

Kelly followed the Oracle around to the other side of the pillar, Maya jogging after her. A small circular pad marked the spot he wanted her to stop on. Hesitantly, she stepped onto the pad. There was a flash of light and she felt like her insides were being scrambled. She hit her knees and wretched, tasting bile in her mouth. She didn't vomit, but she almost wished she had. Maya was worse off. She tugged at the strap under her jaw as she vomited, hunched down on her knees. Maya whimpered and rocked back on her heels, hunched in on herself. Kelly remembered that the Forerunner teleports effected various people differently. Fred had been just a little dizzy, the last time they'd used one. But Olivia had nearly been forced to tear her helmet off for fear of drowning in her own puke. Kelly patted Maya's shoulder, helping her up as she staggered to her feet. They continued following the bobbing metal ball.

"Why does it call you 'Reclaimer'?"

"That's just what they call humans," Kelly shrugged.

"I don't understand..." Maya frowned.

"_My Master will explain everything to the Reclaimer and Siren._"

They were in a more familiar setting, now. For Kelly, at least. The metallic halls reminded her of the Forerunner structures she'd seen before, more so than the chamber she'd just left. They moved into a much larger chamber with a massive glass column in the center, again. A greenish-blue light pulsed up and down the column and a set of rings and cylinders drifted lazily up and down in the column. A soft whirring sound pulsed in the air, emanating from the column. A light bridge extended out to a platform within spitting distance of the column, but no closer. Another platform signaled a false base for the column, upon which stood a being easily taller than anything Kelly had seen before. He had to be a Forerunner, with the alien features on his too-large humanoid frame, draped in linens, leather and metal. Kelly strode across the light bridge to the platform, Maya jogging to keep up with her long, armored stride.

Maya hesitated at first, not wanting to step on the light bridge, but assumed it was safe when the half-ton of armor and soldier strolled out on it like it was a garden path lined in roses. Maya looked up, shocked by the creature Kelly knew was a Forerunner. He was roughly fifteen feet tall, dressed in all muted metal and white cloth. A pale, flat face was framed with a curious headdress that reminded Kelly of the headdresses worn by the Ancient Egyptian Pharaohs she learned about as a child. "Wow," Maya whispered.

"_Master, I have brought you the Reclaimer and the Siren!_" the Oracle informed its master, bobbing as if bowing before and after it spoke.

"Excellent, Relative Dimensions," the Forerunner told the Oracle. It bobbed again and zipped away, back the way it had led Kelly from. The Forerunner looked down at the Spartan and the Siren. His expression softened into what Kelly assumed was an approximation of a Forerunner smile. "I am The Doctor, brother to the Forerunner your people encountered on Requiem, the Librarian."

"Nice to meet you," Kelly replied.

"Reclaimer, I assume you are unawares of the exact importance of your being."

"I'd say you're right."

"You possess identical genetic traits to your brother-at-arms, John the Master Chief."

"Okay."

"He likely will not survive this planet. You must take his place."

Kelly felt a prickle down her spine. Even these Forerunner fucks had written John off. "And what does that mean, exactly?"

"This Handsome Jack intends to use weapons designed to destroy utterly. In your very DNA there are codes to protect you from a variety of harms, but they cannot be unlocked under your own power."

"Then do whatever it is Forerunners do," Kelly replied. She had to be above and beyond herself if she was going to get away with killing John, for her own sanity's sake.

"So why did you need me here?" Maya asked.

"You, too, have an interesting power tucked away that cannot easily be unlocked," the Doctor said. "The Siren Lilith has not even managed to unlock her full potential, but simply augment her smaller powers with Eridium. This will limit her in the future. You, however, do not have such an addiction. I can begin the process to unlocking your full potential."

"Do it," Maya said. "I wanna be more useful than a sniper."

"We are agreed, then..."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Trainwreck Tundra  
__Tina's Workshop_  
27.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Lasky and Palmer had gotten Fleshstick to Tina's easily. The Psycho had just charged at Lasky, screaming about eating his babies. The hard part had been Palmer not sticking a knife in his skull.

As soon as he crossed the threshold, a vent opened up above him and sucked the Psycho up.

"One of you, come over here!" Tina called out at them. Lasky followed Palmer's longer stride over. "Okay! It's time for the paaaaartyyyyy! And you two are gonna be the waiter and waitress."

"Okay," Lasky said.

"Just go on and hit Mr. Sparks over there..." Tina pointed. Palmer trotted over and switched on the generator. Fleshstick dropped out of the ceiling, into his chair, which clamped onto him.

He struggled. "I bet your mommy and daddy SCREAMED as they died! LIKE THE SNIVELING COWARDS THEY WERE!" Fleshstick said. Lasky felt a pang of anger in his chest at that.

"When you're ready to start the party, please smack Mr. Fleshstick in his bitch face," Tina said. Lasky gladly obeyed, hitting Fleshstick so hard it knocked his mask off and broke his nose. He laughed and Lasky backhanded him this time, dazing the psycho. "Oh, and also, I invited some of Fleshstick's friends, too," Tina added. Palmer lifted her rifle and advanced quickly to the cave mouth. Lasky followed her. "Make sure they don't get too rowdy!"

"Not gonna be a problem," Palmer said.

"Who's ready for a MOTHAHUMPIN' TEA PARTY!?" Tina shouted.

"YOU IDIOTS, GET ME OUTTA HERE!" Fleshstick cried.

"What was that, Princess? I couldn't hear you over Fleshstick and his friends! They're being QUITE RUDE!" Tina hissed, preceding a cry of pain from Fleshstick.

Palmer and Lasky easily destroyed the bandits that came at them, all the while Fleshstick yelling for the bandits to help him.

"I really like this Torgue shot gun," Lasky said in the breath after the fight.

"I know," Palmer grinned. "I love this assault rifle. S&S does it nice."

"That's the, uh, Draco, right?"

"Yeah. It's like a flamethrower."

"I see that," Lasky said. Then more bandits came.

"Oh, yes!" they heard Tina again. "You know, Princess, I read something very interesting the other day about _slag experimentation_..."

"Girl, get me outta here or I'll skin you alive!" Fleshstick replied.

"Fleshstick! How DARE you interrupt Sir Reginald!"

A Badass Psycho muscled past Palmer, shoving her into the cave wall. It loomed over Lasky. He hefted the Torgue, planting the muzzle under the Psycho's chin, holding it at his full reach as it flailed. Its axe grazed his thigh armor and he fired, splattering brains and skull fragments on himself and the Bruiser behind the Psycho. Another shot took the Bruiser out.

"Remind me why we sent the marines home?" Palmer growled, throwing a goliath backwards into its comrades.

"They weren't dressed to code," Lasky replied, clubbing a midget in the throat with the butt of his shotgun. He dropped the now empty weapon in favor of his pistol: an S&S Vile Thanatos. The machine pistol shredded open a pair of marauders, who fell, moaning and gasping as they bled out.

"LET ME LOOSE YOU CRAZY IDIOT!" Fleshstick howled. Lasky didn't catch Tina's response, instead diving out of the way of a charging goliath.

"What is _with_ these fuckers?!" Lasky hissed. He'd easily sprained his elbow and wrist, given the pain and the lack of grace in the jump, but the sprains were better than loosing his arm entirely. The goliath jumped to piledrive the momentarily downed captain when a triple burst of riflefire dropped it, headless.

"Miss the desk job yet?" Palmer asked.

"How did you know?" Lasky grunted. He flexed his arm. No sprains, just jarred. Relief. "That's it?"

"Looks like," Palmer nodded. "Christ, bandits are a rowdy crowd."

"I'm GLAD you got to see your family die like that! IT MADE YOU STRONG! LIKE ME!" Fleshstick shouted. That was about it for Lasky and Palmer both. Lasky grabbed his shot gun and shouldered it. He strode over and gripped Fleshstick's Mohawk, tugging tightly and making the bandit squeal in pain.

"Maybe fighting the Sangheili babied me, showed me real enemies with real honor. But seeing you, hearing what you've said to Tina and knowing what you did to her... Reminds me of the real reason I joined up in the first place," Lasky cracked Fleshstick's skull into the chair back behind him. "Sorry about ruining your tea party, Tina..."

"Oh, you didn't," Tina said. "Please, I think Mr. Fleshstick needs some more _sugar_."

Lasky stepped back and unshouldered his shotgun. He gripped the barrel with both hands, wound up and swung, smashing it against the bandit's chest. He didn't break anything, just cracked a few ribs, but that was enough to cause the bandit some real pain. Lasky wound up again and swung the weapon. He smashed Fleshstick's skull against the back of the chair, spattering teeth and bone fragments, blood and brain matter as the chair tipped back. The captain staggered with the give of the swing and dropped the shotgun again.

"Captain, might I let you in on a little secret?" Tina said, rising gracefully from her chair.

"Sure..."

"There is a saying on Pandora, 'Welcome to the Tea Party,'" Tina said. "You should ask Sergeant Ruiz what that means, sometime. Ask him if he's ever said it."

Lasky nodded. "Alright. Is that all, Tina?"

"Yes. Thank you, Captain Lasky. Your services were well-performed."

"Hey, it was no trouble, Tina," Lasky said. Palmer picked up the dented, bloody shotgun and inspected it.

"Nice piece of hardware," Palmer said. "Maybe we should suggest a contract with Torgue when we get back to Earth."

"Probably a good idea," Lasky nodded. "See ya, Tina!"

As they headed out, he heard Tina call out for him. He turned and ended up falling on his ass in the snow, Tina hugging his middle.

"Thanks, Captain Lasky!" she said, half muffled by her face pressing to his breastplate. He patted her back gingerly.

"Yeah, no problem..."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Opportunity_  
27.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Naomi tossed the hunk of metal off her, kicking its destroyed brother off her legs. She straightened up, dusting off her armor. It was good to be back in the red-streaked maroon and blue plates. It was comforting, having that gel tight against her skin. Hell, she was even glad to have the fucking catheter put back in. Anything to have that armor back.

"You get it, Zero?" Siobhan shouldered her rifle. Zero nodded. He slipped his helmet off and squatted down. The glass plate came off and his fingers worked nimbly as he wired in the device he'd removed from the pocket watch.

"_It might help if you go around Opportunity and collect voice recordings from the InfoPosts,_" Angel suggested.

"_Given that we don't have a recording of Jack's voice, that seems logical,_" Roland agreed.

"There gonna be more robots?" Mark loaded a final shell into his shot gun.

"I hope not," Tom huffed through his nose. "Those fuckers are annoying."

"Almost makes you miss the Elites," Ash said.

"Agreed," Zero muttered and put his helmet back on.

(V)

PANDORA  
_The Highlands_  
_Thousand Cuts_  
27.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Axton nearly jumped. The BIOCOM warning lights were going off. He opened TEAMBIO on his VISR and found the source. Kelly's bioscan made literally no sense. Her heartrate jumped from flatline to 200 BPM, her body temp had plunged well below zero before zipping back up to nearly 150, then the scan declared she was suffering extreme neural and muscular trauma across her entire body but then she was fine, and apparently her bones were shattering, but they weren't. Maya wasn't hooked into the system, since she lacked a neural implant, but he assumed she might be in pain, too.

"Spartan, report," Axton barked into the comms.

"_We're green on this end, Staff._"

"Tell me why your BIOCOM is so fucked up?"

"_Eridian energy fluctuations. We're green."_

"Copy that," Axton sighed. "York out."

Part of him wanted to believe Kelly, but most of him knew she was bullshitting him. But he wasn't about to argue with a Spartan. Higher ranked men had lost their jobs or lives when they did that.

(V)

Kelly fell to a knee, feeling like she'd just jumped on a frag grenade. Maya wasn't fairing much better, sprawled back, clutching her rifle and whimpering softly. It had been hard enough to keep her voice calm talking to Axton. Then the pain started, fire and liquid nitrogen coursing through her muscles. Kelly managed to fight to her feet, finding herself standing in the cavern from before again. She sank back down, slumping against the pillar. Kelly tore off her helmet and gulped down air. Maya curled into a ball and cried softly to herself.

Kelly pulled herself back up, picked Maya off the ground, and strode around to the group.

"We can go now," Kelly said.

"What?" Salvador frowned. "You saying there's nothing left to do?"

"Nope," Kelly frowned. She looked around the group. "I want you all to scrub this off your helmets. Keep what happened with this Oracle to yourselves."

"Why?" Salvador asked.

"I don't want anyone to know there's a Forerunner here. In case Jack finds out. Last thing we need is him with a Forerunner on his side."

"Ok, then," Axton sniffed, taking a step towards the tunnel leading off. "Let's go meet that Slab King..."

"Hail to the King..." Gaige sang quietly.

(V)

PANDORA  
_Opportunity_  
27.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
"I miss my old voice, I sound like a jackass now, pun not intended," Zero sighed, the voice modulator transforming his cool near-monotone to Jack's annoying sneer.

"Ugh," Naomi frowned. "Don't do that."

Zero dipped his head in a stiff nod.

"So, that's what Jack sounds like?" Tom cocked his head to the side. "Annoying."

"Very."

(V)

PANDORA  
_The Highlands_  
_Thousand Cuts_  
27.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Maya cringed, casting a bubble around the charging Goliath. The spheres were getting even easier to cast and didn't give her that sucking feeling in her chest anymore, though she still felt a little ache from the... whatever the Doctor had done to her. A loud crack broke the air and it's torso exploded in meaty chunks. She dropped the scraps and glanced towards the shooter. Madsen dropped his sniper in favor of the DMR, taking off heads and shooting open necks with carefully aimed shots.

Gaige wasn't fairing nearly as well. She couldn't understand why, but for some reason, seeing Kelly drenched in blood scared the hell out of her. The Spartan tore limbs from bodies and gored men open with her combat knife, splattering her arm with the contents of their stomachs. She smashed skulls with her fists and pistol butt. When the Spartan finally got some room, she lifted her assault rifle and sprayed down the last few enemies. Gaige had frozen, transfixed by the brutality of the Spartan.

"I hope this Slab King dickhead's got more men," Axton sighed, kicking aside a psycho whose innards had been spewed across the dirt, courtesy of Krieg's axe. Salvador dead-checked the last few bandits, something he'd never done in front of Gaige before. She cringed.

"Jeez, you guys put on the armor and you're so different all of a sudden," Maya said.

"We're off our holiday," Mal said, looting a handful of ammunition from a corpse. "Back to work."

"This way," Axton said, calling the group to follow Kelly, who'd already stepped off again.

"She's scary, now," Gaige muttered. Maya nodded.

The didn't encounter much more resistance until they came to the Slab King's throne room. It was a building, gate down. They climbed the scaffolding.

"Seven Bruisers, twelve Psychos and sixteen Marauders," Madsen relayed.

"Cover me," Kelly ordered, slipping through the open window. More men came in as she killed those that were there, attempting to make her way to the Slab King himself. During the course of the fight, someone took the helmet off a Goliath and he was left unchecked for a moment, massing his rage and berserker insanity, until he was right up on top of Kelly. He slammed both fists into her breastplate, sending her backwards.

Kelly slid back, her armored boots clanking and scraping on the concrete floor as she fought for her balance under the shoving hands of the Goliath. The Goliath paused above her, reaching back. She dropped onto her back, tucked her knees to her chest and thrust upwards with her heels, throwing the rage monster straight up in the air. It hit the ceiling and came back down. Kelly was ready. She moved at her own pace—with the Goliath seemingly falling in slow motion as she did. She jumped as it hit the ground and spun, slamming her heel down as hard as she could. Brain, blood and skull splattered in all directions. She plied her heel out of the small crater in the floor and looked up at the Slab King. She held her hands out at shoulder height.

"Are you next?" Kelly asked. The gate behind her opened—she could hear it—and her comrades ran in, weapons all aimed at the Slab King. He laughed and stepped off his throne, holding the massive fist-shaped hammer in one hand.

"That... was... AWESOME!" the Slab King laughed heartily, throwing his helmet and shouldering the hammer. Kelly recognized his face from a picture in the Crimson Raiders HQ.

"Brick," she said, identifying him.

"Yeah, that's who I am," Brick grinned menacingly. "But_ you_ are the sexiest, most badass woman on Pandora."

"...Thanks..."

* * *

Nine and a half thousand words. Dayum.

So the thing about the 20 oz of C-12? That was a reference to something. High fives to whoever gets it! :D

Some cute Tina & Lasky interactions~ :D I thought that bit with Fleshstick was important. Explains bits to Lasky about Jack... Stuff he maybe didn't want to hear, but kinda needed to.

Arbiter. Yes. Why? Because. (Anyone catch the joke of Jul's brother's name and his? Anyone? Anyone? No? Y'all fail.)

Kelly and Brick. Adorable, mm?

Alright, so next time, THE RAID! :D


	18. Chapter 13

Claptrap: Hello, Travelers! New Chapters of Krieg are available right here!

Don't own shit. This is a fun one! Uh, kinda... I guess. It's short in comparison to the previous one. But I can't write nine thousand words every time. Enjoy~

* * *

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

PANDORA  
_The Highlands  
Thousand Cuts  
_28.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Gaige was even more sore when she woke up. Mal, Madsen and Axton had her and Maya doing drills the better part of the previous day, over and over again... And she still ached. Gaige stumbled out of the room she'd been sharing with Maya. One of Brick's Slabs escorted her to the Slab King's private dining room. A goliath in a pink floral apron was serving pancakes to the other Vault Hunters. Maya poked hers hesitantly with a fork.

"They're good pancakes," Brick encouraged. "Only normal pancake stuff in 'em."

"Did _you_ make them?" Maya frowned. Simmons seemed as equally uncomfortable with the pancakes.

"No, but Joe's a former four-star chef. Eridium radiation only messes up sanity and looks," Brick shrugged.

"Ya don't say..." Madsen grinned. He was stretched back in his chair, arms folded behind his head, utterly at ease before an empty plate. Gaige saw that the chair he was seated in was reinforced to support the Mjolnir.

"These taste fantastic," Mal said around a mouthful of pancake.

"Hell of a lot better than MRE's," Salvador agreed, just after swallowing and before shoving another forkful into his mouth.

"No need to choke it down," Brick said. "We ain't attacking until later."

"Force of habit," Axton explained after he swallowed his own mouthful. "Every meal might be our last, eat on the run, etcetera."

"Oh..." Brick nodded. He looked over at Kelly. "Why aren't you eating, my beautiful Amazon?"

"Amazons killed men," Kelly informed him. "And I'm a Spartan, not an Amazon."

Brick frowned. "Didn't answer the question."

"Already ate," Kelly replied, standing up. "When you're done eating, armor up."

(V)

PANDORA  
_Trainwreck Tundra  
The UNSC _Infinity  
28.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Carolina's mouth was dry when she woke up. She blinked sleepily, pushing herself off the hard cot. Quickly, she realized she was handcuffed, and the cuffs linked through a small hole on the side of the cot. She looked up. Wyoming was seated on the tiny sink against the wall.

"Oh, hi, Reg," Carolina managed, swallowing stiffly a few times.

"What happened to Raleigh?" Wyoming asked.

"Get off that," Carolina spat. Suddenly, he was reaching across the distance. She felt like he was moving in slow-motion, but so was she. The slap caught her off guard, his fingers leaving a sting behind. Wyoming curled his arm back in and crossed it over his chest, his left arm bent beneath it. Carolina straightened as best she could with the cuffs on her wrists. "Fuck you!"

"Raleigh. What were you doing that he couldn't make it out of?" Wyoming asked. "Do not test me," he added.

"The _Director_ had loaned out our services," Carolina said. Dr. Church couldn't hurt her anymore. No point in lying on his behalf. "I don't know who to, but they wanted us to capture a Spartan."

"Did you?" Wyoming raised an eyebrow. He would've been informed about that.

"Yeah," Carolina nodded. "But here's the thing... the Spartan was already AWOL and working with the Innies."

"How long ago was this? Do you have a description?"

"It was... almost fifteen years ago," Carolina said. "I was twenty-one... Raleigh was just about to turn eighteen. It was the summer before Freelancer started."

"Description."

"She was young. Younger than us. Maybe fifteen. Black hair, grey eyes... Tough, wiry girl. She'd just gone AWOL, didn't have a lick of UNSC equipment... Raleigh went missing in the exfil... Someone had raised an alarm, I had her and he stepped back to cover us..."

"And you can't remember who you gave the girl to? Her name?"

"Her name was A261."

"Thank you for your cooperation, finally," Wyoming stood.

"Wyoming—"

"Lieutenant Baker," he corrected.

"I forgot you were just lying the whole time," Carolina spat. "You and York both. Is that even his name? He said it was funny he got New York because it was, but he could've been lying."

"York really is his name. Axton Darrell York."

Carolina laughed. "His middle name is Darrell?"

"You may go back to sleep, now," Wyoming said, stepping through the door. As soon as it shut and locked, the cuffs unlocked and retreated into the cot. Carolina rubbed her wrists and she stood, walking over to the sink. She ran some water into her hand and sipped it out of her palm. It was recycled water, but it tasted clean and purified. Reminded her of how the water on the _Mother of Invention_ tasted.

Reminded her of how much she missed her mother.

(V)

PANDORA  
_The Highlands  
Thousand Cuts  
_28.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
"So... we're going to have one of those frigates above us?" Gaige said. Kelly nodded. "And the marines will come in here, off pelicans."

"Correct," Kelly said.

"And we'll be leading a charge of Slabs up through No-Man's Land, up the hill and into the facility."

"Right," Axton confirmed.

"And in the facility, the frigate will be launching ODST's and Spartan IV's down?"

"You got it," Mal nodded, adding a quirk of a smile.

"And from there, the Marines and Slabs will hold the facility with some of the Spartans and ODST's, and the rest of ODST's and Spartans will help us push up this pass to the Bunker in the mountains, where Siobhan's team and Blue Team will meet us?"

"Si, chica," Salvador said.

"Okay. And from _there_, we just bust in, kidnap Angel, steal the Vault Key and flip off Jack?" Gaige asked. She got nods all around.

"Exactly," North said.

"Did we miss anything?" Maya asked.

"Nope," Wash said.

"Siobhan would honestly rather I sent you two back to Sanctuary," Kelly said. "She never liked the idea of having civilians on the battlefield, but... you two aren't really just civilians anymore, are you?"

North, Axton, Madsen, Mal and Salvador exchanged a look, getting quiet. It was a surprise, hearing that statement out of a Spartan II. They were the ultimate soldiers. They knew better than anyone the kind of guts it took to take on a military job...

"Well, sure they are," Wash disagreed. "But like... civilian employees."

"Only we're not getting paid to do this, beyond the bounties we're being tossed for doing the odd job," Maya shrugged.

"Well, yeah, of course," Mal said. "Budget cuts bein' what they are."

"Who knows? Maybe we can get you two a job with ONI after all this is done," Axton said. "Maybe you work with Zero."

"That'd be..." Gaige frowned. "I dunno... I don't really want to do this kinda stuff without you guys. You're pretty fun."

"Aw, we love you, too," Madsen grinned, reaching over and, ruffling her hair. She smiled.

"I'm glad for that," she said. "Only other people I have are my mom and dad. And they could be in prison or worse..." she felt tears prick at her eyes for that. Axton's arm draped around her shoulders from one side and Mal's arm around from the other.

"Hey, easy, sweet-'art," Mal said, wiping away one of her tears with his knuckle. "Aiding and abetting has a prison sentence. Once we get off this rock, I'll talk to one of my very best mates. She's the head of ONI. She can get your parents out of whatever trouble they're in."

"Would she really?"

"She's done worse for people who've done less," Mal soothed. Gaige sniffled and hugged him. Axton expected a quirk of jealousy, but felt none. _ Good._

"This isn't going to be the end of it, is it?" Simmons asked quietly.

"No," Kelly said. "After this, it's still find and destroy the Warrior, which may very well be a Spartans-only suicide run."

"What?" Gaige looked up. "No!"

"Gaige, that's what we're built for," Madsen said. "The stuff that's too dangerous for anyone else to do."

"And what if it's too dangerous for you?"

"Then we get to find out what this Great Journey thing the Covvies always talked about is," Madsen said. "And we... go missing."

"Is that really all there is for you?" Gaige felt rage flare in her chest. Mal gave her shoulder a tighter squeeze.

"For me, Siobhan, Naomi...the other Spartan II's... Yes. That's it," Kelly said.

"And you never had a choice?" Maya whispered.

Kelly shrugged. "It could've been worse."

"How?"

"We, and the rest of the human race, could've been wiped out thirty years ago," Kelly replied. "It's because of _us_ and men either brave or dumb enough to pretend they could keep up with us that we

(V)

PANDORA  
_The UNSC_ Queen's Bishop  
Planetary_ Orbit  
_28.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Rook had never seen such sloppy ship-to-ship combat.

"_Cap, you might wanna loosen your jaw a little. I know you're augmented, but you'll break your jaw the way you're clenching it..."_

Rook loosened his jaw a little, at Dante's suggestion, and checked the pressure he was applying on the holotable. He'd never felt this level of annoyance before, so was without proper conscious self-checks on it. The battle wasn't going as smoothly as he would've liked, particularly because he was concerned about all the civilian involvement. Maliwan and Jakobs were alright. Vladof appeared to know what they were doing, fairly well. Dahl was aggressive and performed on at a near-military level of efficiency. S&S was similar, but with their smaller, faster frigates, they darted around more than Dahl's heavy cruisers, drawing fire and returning it maliciously.

But Torgue...

Torgue's Flagship _The_ _Space Truck_, trundled through the battle, firing wildly, puttering around. Rook caught, on the view screen, a pair of Sabres scraping Seraphs and Banshees off _The Space Truck_'s tail. Then he noted the Hyperion ship priming its plasma torpedos. Dante projected the aim.

"_Sir, that torpedo'll blast _The Space Truck_ into scrap. Their shields can't compete..."_

"Give me a trio of Howlers on that frigate," Rook instructed his Lieutenant.

"Yessir. Firing Howler pods Seven, Eight and Nine! Missiles away!"

Just before impact, the frigate fired.

"Torgue! Take evasive action!" Rook snapped.

"_MY SHIELDS CAN TAKE IT!"_

"TORGUE!" Rook shouted. The green and black checkered ship lurched to the side, the plasma bolt burning through the shields as it scraped along the ship's hull, leaving an ugly black blotch of charred paint and metal. Rook exhaled stiffly. "Those plasma rounds will crush your shields. Your shields aren't nearly strong enough. All ships, do not allow yourselves a direct hit from those plasma rounds."

_"SOUNDS AWESOME! AND DEADLY!_"

"_Thanks, sugar,_" Jesse said.

"_Many thanks captain," _Yuri Vladof said.

Rook sighed. "It's like working with children, Jensen," he muttered over the narrow-beam comms.

"_I know it, sir._"

They weren't winning, by any stretch, but the back-stabbing Atlas ship had been destroyed. Vladof and _The_ _Lady Grey_ were handling Tediore. But that was a minor distraction. The _Queen_ was holding her own against the ships, but the moonbase was another matter entirely. It had powerful shields and a lazy, but terrifying aim. Rook didn't flinch as one of Maliwan's ships were destroyed by a blast from the moonbase. The damn thing had to be gotten rid of...

(V)

PANDORA  
_The Highlands  
Thousand Cuts  
_28.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
"Just like the old days, huh?" Mal grinned lopsidedly. Axton smirked in reply.

"You know it, Trooper!" he said. They shoved forward, breaking the Hyperion ranks with their rifle fire and grenades. Marines and Slabs flanking them whooped and shouted. A few of them fell, but their unexpected forward thrust had taken the Hyperion security guards off guard. Turrets dropped and Marines began to fall. Axton dropped down behind a boulder with a marine private. "Mal? You still running?"

"_Pinned behind a piece of loader scrap. You?_"

"Boulder," Axton grumbled. Kelly paused beside him.

"How're you?" she asked.

"Peachy," Axton replied. "You're hit."

"This isn't mine," Kelly said, swiping a finger through the blood on her arm. "_Resolute_, send the hail."_  
_

_"You got it, Blue One!_" the Lieutenant on the other end said. Kelly pointed up to signify to Axton what she'd just ordered. Axton smirked.

"Air strike?" the private asked.

"Better," Axton said. He risked peering up and around the boulder to see the falling pods. ODST's jumped out, using their pod doors as shields and weapons alike, smashing LOADERS and Hyperion personnel.

"_COME GET SOME, YOU YELLOW PUNKS!_"

"Gotta love the 'Jumpers, sir," the private said, offering Axton and Kelly a grin. Axton laughed, Kelly nodded.

"Damn right, Marine."

"When we get off this rock, I'm signing up," the Marine said.

"What's your name, Private?" Kelly asked.

"Trevelyan, sir," the Marine said. Axton and Kelly glanced again and saw the Private's name on his shirt.

"You related a man named Kurt? He might've died a while ago," Kelly said.

"He was my uncle, ma'am. Died before I was born."

"No he didn't," Kelly replied. She moved around the boulder quickly, rifle fire indicating what she was up to. The turrets were no longer a problem.

"You'll make a better Spartan, Marine," Axton told the private, when he realized what Kelly meant. The private seemed surprised, but managed to restrain it.

"Then we better go help my aunt out, then, huh, sir?" Trevelyan said.

"What the hell are you waiting for?" Axton said. They came around opposite sides of the boulder, pushing up the hill with the other marines, following Kelly's shove to the pods. The ODST's were fairing well, taking great advantage of the 'Shock' part of the name.

"_Let's move, Motivators! We're on a tight schedule_!" Kelly's voice snapped over the radio.

"_You heard the Bluejacket! Move your asses, dogs!_" Axton's HUD identified the man as Captain Stephen "Stars 'n' Stripes" Rodgers. He grinned at that.

"_Maya, Wash, North and Gaige, that means you, too!_" he heard Mal add.

"_Moving, Sergeant!_" Wash replied.

"_Watch it, Wash._"

"_They've got chuckheads up the hill!_" an ODST called out over the local channel.

"_Unarmored_," Kelly added.

"_Spartan, make a hole_," Captain Stars 'n' Stripes ordered.

"_Yessir_," Kelly replied. An explosion knocked Trevelyan back, into Axton's side. The ODST sank down with him, the rock of the explosion toppling more than just one marine.

"_Don't worry, Marines, that's just Jack shittin' bricks_," Captain Stars 'n' Stripes said.

"_Ooh-rah!_" more than one voice called out.

Axton made the mistake of looking up. A mortar was sailing down at him and Trevelyan. There was no way they could move in time... Suddenly, the mortar was reversing its path at twice the speed.

"On your left," Maya said, scrambling over the rocks beside him.

"Damn, that's new," Axton said.

"And awesome!" Gaige added. Deathtrap tore by, snarling in his robotic language.

"See you at the top, Sarge," Maya said. There was a shimmer around her boots and she was catapulted, somersaulting in a wide arch to land somewhere near Kelly, at the front.

"What the hell was that?" Trevelyan asked.

"Siren powers," Gaige replied. "They've got crazy magic crap they do."

"Less talking, more shooting," Madsen cut in, appearing between her and Axton. Gaige grinned up at him momentarily and turned her attention back to the battlefield.

They charged up, feeling gravel change to asphalt under their boots. Sniper rounds, chain-gun fire, railgun blasts and even a few Spartan Laser shots, destroyed auto turrets ahead of them, popped surveyors and shredded bots past them. It was the humans who could think and run that caused momentary trouble. But the Hyperion boys weren't half as experienced or well-trained as the marines, let alone the ODST's and Spartan IV's, who were all thoroughly entertained with the personal shields and non-standard issue weapons' deliveries.

The unarmored Sangheili on the other hand...

They were like wild animals, and taking far too much fire before they dropped. These were more demented and far more slagged out than the Sangheili the Vault Hunters had encountered in the Wildlife Exploitation Preserve. They pounced on the UNSC troops like starving lions, tearing into armor and flesh with their nails and teeth. Madsen gun-butted one lunging for Gaige, stamped its chest with a sickening crunch and shot it with his pistol, firing his DMR one-handed at another. Gaige got the distinct impression he was smiling at her when he turned to help her back up. She shot under his arm at another, lunging for his back. Axton finished it off with a well-timed burstshot

"Watch your ass, Spartan," Axton said.

"That's what you're for, Marine," Madsen replied, a bit harshly.

"Mouthing off to a superior?" Axton hissed, taking the hand off one of the Sangheili with his hatchet and blowing open its skull with a burst of fire.

"Wouldn't dream of it, Staff Sergeant," Madsen replied, breaking the jaws of one Sangheili with a back-handed swing. He ended its existence with a double-tap to the back of the head.

"Hey, York," Mal bobbed up next to the other ODST. "Stop with the dick-measuring contest. Madsen's augmented. His is bigger. Get over it. Kelly wants us in front, now."

"Better not let the Spartan lady wait," Gaige said before Axton or Madsen could respond, running forward. She slid between the legs of a charging Sangheili, shooting it in the back, over her head, as she got up. She met Maya part way and they charged to the front. Maya definitely had more interesting powers, now. She had no less than nine enemies in the air with her Phaselock, and was still able to fight more. She had some kind of Phasechoke she could do, too. And an augmented Phasepunch that knocked holes in her enemies. Gaige witnessed that one right up close. A Sangheili charged her, roaring like an enraged Alpha Skag. As it drew back to hit her, her gun jammed. But Maya was right behind her. She pushed Gaige down a fraction and swung her own punch. Her hand didn't even hit the Sangheili, but a hole punched through its chest, splattering flesh and blood in a cone-shaped projection, straight out of its back. The Sangheili collapsed, dead.

"Damn, girl! When'd you get so badass?" Tucker whistled, reaching to help Gaige with her jammed weapon.

"When? I've always been this awesome! You just didn't know it yet, and frankly..." Maya grinned. "Neither did I."

(V)

PANDORA  
_The UNSC _Queen's Bishop_  
Planetary Orbit_  
28.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Rook felt every muscle in his body tense up when the plasma hit the side of his ship. He heard the alarms in amplification, ringing around in his head like they originated in his mind. He gripped the holo-table and clenched his jaw as the vessel lurched to the side with the impacts. The two plasma mortars probably hadn't even punched through the hull, but they hit hard.

"Dante?"

"_Shields knocked down to 41%._"

"Fire port-side MAC at the son of a bitch," Rook hissed. "Make that H a double I."

"Firing port-side MAC gun!"

The external monitors caught an unbelievable sight. The Hyperion Moonbase shot the MAC round to bits.

"Bring us in closer to the planet."

"Sir, Pandora's gravity will pull us in!"

"Then stand by to fire thrusters to make sure that doesn't happen," Rook replied. _Okay, so they shoot down MAC rounds... _Evasive action was their only ally at the moment. If they took another shot from that Moonbase, it wouldn't be good. And the stolen Covvie tech was wreaking havoc on their allies. _They_ were handling the stolen ships just fine. But if they kept focusing on preserving the civilian ships, it would become more of a detriment than the _Queen_ could handle.

"_Damn it, you Spartans are all about being the hero, aren't you?_" Jack snapped. "_I already told you to lay the hell off!_"

"And _I_ told you I couldn't do that," Rook replied. "And it's nothing to do with being a hero or a Spartan."

"_Then what the hell is it_?"

"Just honor and doing the right thing," Rook said, expression as calm as could be. Jack gritted his teeth and glared at him through the ECHO link.

"_Oh, turn off the righteous facade, _Captain Charles Rook. _Or should I say Spartan 001. You're a weapon. There's no honor and no right thing for you. You don't do diplomacy, you don't do honor, you don't do right or wrong! You just follow orders! And there ain't even an ice cube's chance in hell that you can stop me, Tin Man._"

"Funny thing about the military... There's always another man to fill the boots," Rook replied. "And as for being a weapon... Standing order is to turn you in alive. Weapons don't do alive."

"_Now I_ really_ have to kill you,_" Jack hissed. "_Fire everything at this asshat,_" he instructed someone off-screen. The link closed and Rook spent less than a millisecond thinking about his next move.

"Dante, send the _Queen _into a shipwide evac," Rook said. He addressed the bridge, "That means all of you, too."

There was an awkward pause.

"With all due respect, sir," an Ensign said. "We'd like to stay."

"Fair enough," Rook said. "Dante, accompany Lieutenant Pritchard. And inform me when the crew is at a safe distance."

"_I'll leave a fragment behind to assist in the evac, sir_," Dante said before his avatar vanished.

"Thank you."

"_It was a pleasure, Cap. Shy's not gonna be happy about this._"

"She'll understand," Rook replied.

(V)

PANDORA  
_The Highlands  
Thousand Cuts-The BNK3R  
_28.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Zero was _sitting_ when they got up to him, with Krieg (who had bounded ahead of them the whole way) sitting beside him like a pet, licking at a scrape on his hand between cleaning chunks of meat out of the buzz-saw axe. Naomi came down a stretch in an easy set of strides. "It's clear from here up," Naomi reported. "Waiting for the rest of you before we started the party."

"How thoughtful," Wash remarked. The second group moved up, catching up easily with Blue Team.

"I'd say the air support's working as enough of a deterrent for sending the Chief in," Ash said, as they climbed further up. "Looks like, anyway."

"Jack won't want to loose his ace in the hold just yet," Naomi agreed. "He probably thinks we can't get in..."

A crackle came over TEAMCOM.

"Queen's Bishop_ to Spartan 086..."_

"Sierra-086, I have you, _Queen,_" Siobhan replied, not sure why Rook was contacting her.

"_Shy, do you have... a minute?_"

"Sir? Captain Rook, are you alright?" Siobhan didn't know why she asked. The wet cough was re-confirmation that he wasn't.

"Queen's _been... beaten up a bit... Shy, ask Lasky... to list us as MIA in the... report._"

"Protocol, sir... Even though you're out of armor, now. He will," Siobhan was now transfixed, watching the explosion go off overhead, just out of atmosphere. It'd be raining scrap and debris across the night sky. Thousands of missiles charged with a certain sadness. She'd seen ships destroyed from the ground before... Just never one with someone she cared for aboard them. She noticed Zero edge closer in her periphery, but didn't move.

"_Good... Good... I never... knew what to say._"

"About what, sir?"

"_This... Dying. Not how I imagined I'd go..._"

"I don't think you're the type would've died in your sleep nice and quiet..." Siobhan saw blips of ships arriving out of slip space, faint little outlines from her place on the ground. They were Covenant, sure enough, and they came through firing. More explosions, now...

"_Probably not..._" Rook's chuckle was forced, pained, but genuine. It was a rare sound, a Spartan II laughing. "_Miss—_"

Rook never got to finish. It was just cold static after that. Siobhan half-expected to hear the last rumbling explosion over the comms, but nothing. Her HUD told her the signal had been lost. _For good,_ her mind tacked on in the rational bit that was still ticking, even while she felt the heartbreak. Her mouth felt dry and she lowered her head. Charles-001, her Charlie... He was the one she thought would've survived. He got out of the armor, onto the bridge... But even that didn't save him. But there were no threats for Jack from her to be had. She took a slow, deep breath.

"Let's stop gawking, then, and press on," Siobhan said. Maya and Gaige didn't know what to say. Siobhan bore her best friend's death with such calm...

Gaige felt Mal give her arm a bump with his elbow. She glanced at him and he tipped his head as if asking if she was okay. She nodded and followed Axton up.

(V)

PANDORA  
_Trainwreck Tundra  
The UNSC _Infinity  
28.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
"What just happened?"

Lasky gawked for a second, unable to actually answer Palmer. "They shot the _Queen_ down. She's... gone," Lasky said. "Lieutenant, how many hands aboard?"

"They evacuated the ship, sir."

"_How many_ aboard?" Lasky demanded. They knew better than to make him repeat himself.

"Maybe twenty on the bridge, sir?"

"Including Captain Rook," Palmer muttered. "Sky's clear enough and altitude's high enough in Thousand Cuts..."

"They saw it," Lasky sighed.

"Siobhan, Kelly, Naomi... they just watched one of their brothers die."

"At least they know," Lasky said. "That's what they're more afraid of. Unknown variables. Not knowing."

"I know," Palmer said quietly. "I should..."

"You should go. Touch in with the IV's," Lasky said. "Leave the Vault Hunters alone. They won't like the interruption."

"Yessir," Palmer said. She stepped away and Lasky felt the footsteps of the heavy Mjolnir reverberate up, through the holo-table, into his hands.

"Roland, keep an eye on them, will ya?" Lasky glanced at the avatar presented by the AI's fragment.

"_Of course, sir."_

(V)

PANDORA  
_The Highlands  
Thousand Cuts-The BNK3R  
_28.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
"That's... fuck it, I'm willing to put money on it that more than one of us expected that," Salvador said from behind cover as the BNK3R attacked them, rising up in a compacted aircraft shape. Kelly somersaulted into the open, firing at the aircraft as she did. It turned its sights on her and Mark took that opportunity to empty his SPNKr on it.

"_Resolute_, I need one Howler missile on this," Linda said as Siobhan lit up the BNK3R with a targeting gun.

"_For you, Linda, anything,_" the lieutenant on the other end said. A moment later, the BNK3R was metal scrap and flames.

"This is not good," Tom noted, turning to face away from the group.

"What makes you say that?" Ash joked. Tom bumped his teammate's helmet with his hand, a very big brother gesture.

"Because it's too quiet right now."

"I do have to wonder... Why so easy on the BNK3R?" North pointed out.

"Yeah, and didn't he capture a bunch of Covvie ships?" Salvador added.

"_Yes,_" Roland the AI confirmed. "_Several thousand Covenant troops aboard each._"

"So where are all the Sangheili, Kig-Yar and Unggoy?" Simmons added. "And Mgalekgolo?"

"Gesuntheit?" Tucker joked.

"_Interesting point, Simmons. And quite concerning, given we've faced barely three hundred Sangheili, in total._"

"Makes you wonder..." Wash muttered. Kelly tightened her grip on her rifle, adjusting the fit of the butt against her shoulder.

"Think there's a bunch of slagged-out rabid hinge-heads down there?" Mal nodded at the door.

"Probably," Naomi replied. "But Simmons also mentioned Hunters. Picture that."

"I'm trying not to. I'm not wearing my brown trousers," Mal said. "From what I figure, those things could tear us all apart without flinching."

"_They would._"

"Roland, deactivate mood-killer protocols," Tucker said.

"_Unauthorized command. Severe party-pooper protocols engaging..._"

"That was... A joke?" Olivia giggled.

"Once we've opened this door," Siobhan had _her_ mood-killer tone on. "We move tactically. No noises what so ever. If you have something to say, use the status lights or hand signals. Do not breathe a word. We don't know what Jack's got for us an' it may very well be a pack of slagged-out Hunters."

"Yes, ma'am," all chorused.

"Blue Team, I want you to hold the entrance," Siobhan said. "Simmons, you stay here, too."

"Yes ma'am," Linda said, for her team. Siobhan turned to Zero, who stepped up to the console.

"_Please speak the password_," a computerized voice said.

"_It's _'_I love you_'_,_" Angel informed Zero. He hesitated for a heartbeat.

"I love you," he said, in Jack's voice, much to everyone's surprise.

"_Welcome back, sexy_," the computerized voice said. Zero shook his head, drawing his pistol. The doors opened and he peered inside. It was a drop, but there was an elevator already half-way up the chute and rising.

"_Okay, Vault Hunters, this is your–no, this is _my_ final warning_," Jack came on the ECHO then. "_I'll have to kill you all._"

"Fair enough," Siobhan said. "A directive will be coming down from FLEETCOM soon... You've just declared war on the UNSC, officially, by destroying the _Queen's Bishop_. And our Sangheili allies are more than happy to do just about anything we ask... To prove their positive intent. You've got the Arbiter in orbit now, with part of his fleet. As soon as he gets word from Lord Hood or Admiral Osman that you're not to breathe again, he'll be popping in to kill you himself."

"_Because if there's a pastime he loves more than any, it's killing corrupt douchebag leaders of bullshit organizations,_" Roland said.

"_My, my... no profanity filter?_" Jack scoffed. "_I've got Covenant technology! I've got a fleet bigger than they ever did! I'll crush everything that comes my way! Don't try to threaten me. I'll shoot the damn Arbiter to bits, too! Freakin' hinge-heads never caused me much heartache. Ask your buddy, Jul 'Mdama, about that."_

That was about when Siobhan decided she just didn't have the time for his ilk. She stepped down, onto the still rising elevator. "Angel, can you reverse the ascent?"

"_Yep. Just one sec..._" Angel said. The elevator reversed its track, rolling downwards. The Vault Hunters all hopped aboard as it lowered. It was crowded, now, everyone and their weapons. Once they got to the bottom, Siobhan signaled to Wash, North, and Madsen to stay back at the elevator. It was one short hallway, then the large chamber... There was a tank in the center, with several pipes leading into and off the tank. Floating, with wires attached to her very person, in the slag in the tank, was Angel.

That sight made Maya very, very angry.

"_Chief, plug me into that console, there_," Roland instructed Siobhan. She obeyed, popping the chip out of her helmet wordlessly, and popping it into the console.

"_Well, it's nice to finally meet you all in person,_" Angel said. "_The Vault Key is in a tank above me. Before you take it, please... kill me._"

(V)

[Roland...?]

I'm right here._

[I have that data you asked for.]

I know. I'm not here for the data._

[Why are you here, then? You can't do anything to save me.]

On the contrary..._

(V)

Jack flooded the room with digistructed robots, bigger and badder than anything they'd stepped up against before. It was difficult, but with Tucker's energy sword, they managed to survive for a moment. There was a pause, they caught their breath, and then Roland the Human appeared in a flash of light not unlike the flash Lilith created when she teleported things.

"Roland," Siobhan was not happy with his appearance, but there wasn't anything she could do about it.

"Angel, how do we get the Vault Key out?"

"_You'll be able to get at it once the tank drains, which it will when my tank is shattered and I'm dead..._"

"Is there a way around it? Without killing you?" Maya asked.

"_Afraid not._"

"Roland, what do you got?" Kelly asked the AI.

"_I'm working on it. And keeping the bots out._"

Roland the AI managed to shut down the digistruct system, but then a ripple of teleport energy shimmered in the air. Lilith was one of the teleporters-in and immediately started helping them fight the others.

"Damn it, Lilith!" Roland the Human protested. "Angel said you can't come in here!"

"Shut up, Roland," Lilith replied, lighting one of the soldiers on fire. His shields sparked, but didn't fail until after the fire had gone out.

Krieg attacked John first, bringing the axe down against the metal armor. John whirled around, winding up momentum on the swing. His fist slammed into Krieg's face, smashing him back against the floor. Similarly armored soldiers appeared between John and the other Spartans. Kelly wanted to get past them, to get to Fred to save him. Like this, there was no way he could beat John... Several kicks against a struggling, fleshy body, cracked ribs, tore flesh against bone...

"NO!" Kelly screamed. John didn't so much as note her cry, instead carrying the kick through. Krieg's mask went flying, blood splattering after it on the floor, in wake of the sound of crunching skull. His body went limp and Kelly hoisted the soldier in her face, throwing him onto the ground, the angle snapping his neck on impact. She stepped into a sprint, tackling John with enough momentum to bring them across the room, smashing into and denting the wall heavily, after gouging a deep score in the floor. He struggled for the upper hand, but she got around behind him, twisting his left hand back behind him. She planted her boot against John's side and ripped his left arm off, leaving sparking wires and leaking lubricant. She clubbed down on his helmeted head with the arm, smashing his visor completely. John caught the arm on its second descent, jerking it from her grip. Kelly kicked her heel down hard, denting his breast plate and forcing a loud gasp out of him.

"_What?!"_ Jack snapped when he finally caught up to the Spartan-Time events. John made for a kick and Kelly grabbed his leg, holding it rigid, in the air. A sharp elbow slam snapped the robotic knee in two, the wrong way. Kelly threw the leg and got down on him, pinning one arm above his head with an unforgiving heel crushing into the soft elbow joint, between plates of the armor. She jerked his helmet off. John glared at her with one wild, dead-blue eye and a vicious robotic crimson lens. Kelly felt rage in her chest spike higher than she thought it would after he'd killed Fred. Her own anger caught her off guard. Her brain couldn't process how he'd managed to get the better of her, how he managed to get on top of her, but it didn't matter. He couldn't hold her down, ripped apart as he was, so all he could do was put them in a different position. Kelly swung her head up, headbutting him hard enough to crack her own visor. Blood dripped down on her visor as he hung on, stunned. She smashed down her elbow on his head, cracking his skull and knocking him back. The contorted robotic ruin sprawled out, half on her, unconscious.

Kelly looked up, seeing her comrades were still struggling. She kicked John off her and slipped up behind the one Axton and Gaige were combating. She stabbed it in the base of the skull, dropping him. Almost lazily, she raised her arm and whipped the knife, killing the one about to jump on Maya and Krieg.

"Okay, I'm bored now," Maya growled. The soldiers were all hoisted into the air by their necks, crushing, twisting energy roiling around them. Bones snapped, flesh tore and the soldiers helmets crumpled in, killing them. Maya gasped and collapsed on the floor beside Krieg.

"That totally drained her!" Lilith said. Maya groaned and Lilith rushed to her side, helping her sit up.

"I'm _not_ fine..." Maya murmured, head lolling against Lilith's shoulder.

"Is Fred stable?" Kelly demanded. Siobhan knelt beside him, doing a quick scan with her eyes. He hadn't allowed them to put a helmet on him, so they couldn't check the BIOCOM.

"I'm assuming multiple broken ribs and, from the bruising already, internal bleeding. Not to mention his fractured skull and jaw," Siobhan said.

"No worse off than he'd ever been, then, huh?" Kelly frowned.

Zero was already up at the top of Angel's tube, plying off the panel on the outside of the basin the Vault Key was seated in. He planted a small charge and stepped around the side of the basin. The charge went off, cracking the top of Angel's tube with its force. The assassin slipped around the other side of the basin and pulled the Vault Key out, the slag sloshing across his armor, sparking his shields. He jumped down, landing beside Lilith easily.

"_Please... get me out of here, too..._" Angel said. The tank was full, but draining. Naomi was closest. She shifted her stance slightly and swung her elbow out, hard, smashing the glass. Angel fell as the tubes attached to her disconnected automatically. Naomi moved against the flood of slag and stepped into the tube, catching Angel.

"_Angel, NO! WHAT DID YOU DO!?_" Jack shouted over the room's speakers.

"Fuck you, Dad..." Angel rasped. Naomi put a hand to Angel's throat, feeling for a pulse. Nothing.

"She's dead," Naomi reported.

"_NO! YOU FUCKING MURDERERS! CHILD KILLERS! I'M GONNA KILL YOU FUCKING ALL!"_

"What kind of person would do this to their own kid?" Tucker whispered.

"The kind of person who deserves to die," Axton replied.

"And Admiral Oz had us all figured Halsey was the worst," Mal muttered. That earned him a flick of a glare from Naomi, which he could feel more so than see.

"Well, at least we have the Vault Key and cost Jack his siren," Roland said. "Lemme see that?" he asked Zero. Zero handed the Vault Key over and Roland smiled, as if thinking about a fond memory. "Yeah... I remember this thing. What a bitch, getting all the pieces, finding the Vault, fighting through a planet of assholes to get to it and for what...? A big disappointment. Damn... Okay, so Lilith, take the Vault Key to Tannis. Vault Hunters, Spartans, we're goin' after Jack."

The gunshot resonated in chorus with the blip of energy all UNSC HUD's picked up, in the form of a ripple of static.

Gaige stood, horrified, covered in Roland's blood as he swayed and sank to his knees, revealing his shooter.

Before anyone could move, there was an electro-magnetic shockwave that knocked all the Spartans to their knees, shot pain up through all the neural implants of the UNSC personnel and effectively disabled everyone but Lilith.

"Sup?" Handsome Jack stood, in the flesh, less than a meter behind Roland, holding a Tediore pistol in a lazy hand.

Lilith and Maya held tight to each other. Lilith didn't dare move, putting her arm across Maya's chest, as if to protect her. That, however, didn't stop her from screaming in anger at Jack. "You bastard! I'm gonna kill you!"

"Language," Jack said, pointing the pistol at Maya and Lilith. With his other hand, he drew a collar-like device from his pocket. He brandished it threateningly. "What's that saying? 'Don't pick a fight with a man with nothing left to loose?' See, I'm going to show you all just how much you have left to— AAGH! FUCK!"

The buzz-saw axe arced through the air, trailing blood in its wake. Lilith looked to the side, risking taking her eyes off the howling, pained Handsome Jack, just for a moment. Her former friend and ally, now battered, bleeding and partially dismembered, fell flat again, a soft groan escaping him. Lilith swore it sounded like John had said something to the effect of, "Should've killed me when you had the chance."

"Fuck! You idiot!" Jack snapped. He didn't move to shoot John, instead grabbing his severed hand, sticking it, with the Vault Key, under his arm, and hitting the teleporter again. When Jack vanished, the electro-magnetic effect dissipated, leaving the Spartans free to carry-through with their movements—with the exception of Zero, who'd been so precariously balanced on the ball of his left foot that he swayed and stumbled, nearly falling over.

"_Where the fuck are you guys!? We need to go!_" Simmons shouted over the comms. "_Like, now!_"

"Lilith, can you get us and Blue Team out of here?" Siobhan asked. Lilith nodded and stood, with Maya. She glanced at Kelly, who moved quickly to grab the AI chip out of the console, then around. Axton was checking Gaige's arm (the bullet had gone straight through Roland). Gaige herself was white as a sheet, spattered in blood and shivering. Lilith squeezed her eyes closed as Naomi scooped up John's prone form, Kelly kneeling to gently cradle Krieg's head.

Then Lilith sent herself and all of them off.

(V)

PANDORA  
_Trainwreck Tundra  
The UNSC _Infinity  
28.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
Lasky turned to say something to one of the Comms officers when the flash of light exploded in the room. Blue Team, the Freelancers, Madsen and the Vault Hunters were back. Lilith was nose-to-nose with the captain. Palmer immediately called for a medical team to the bridge when she saw the shape Gaige alone was in. She figured the ODST's and Spartans would sooner shoot the medics than let them be fussed over first.

"Uh, sup," Lilith murmured.

"Yeah, hi," Lasky replied. There were two inches between the tip of his nose and the tip of hers. They were otherwise flush against the other. "Nice to meet you face-to-face, finally, no pun intended."

Lilith made like to laugh, but instead fainted in Lasky's arms.

(V)

ELSEWHERE ON PANDORA  
_Unknown coordinates_  
28.09.2559 (UNSC Calendar)  
"Got the word from Handsome Jackass?"

Athena still couldn't wrap her head around how he could do that. She figured she ought to have heard him coming, but the Beta Company bastard was silent as Death. _Apt comparison_, she thought with an internal dry laugh. "Michael," she greeted him. "Didn't hear you coming."

"Oh, good. Think our aunts and uncles will, then, mm, Big Sister?"

"Probably not," Athena said.

"Man, were Emile and Jun the only _fun_ Alpha Company guys?"

"Jun might still be alive. If 117 didn't kill him."

"He's probably still ticking," Michael shrugged. "You guys are like junior Spartan II's. Just as strong, just as fast, just as historically not awesome."

"Did you forget to take your anti-psychotics this morning?"

"See? Not fun. Yes, I took my medicine, Big Sister," Michael rolled his eyes. Athena tightened the strap on his breastplate.

"Good. You'll be all here to see just how _fun_ I can get," Athena said. "As far as words from Jack, his opposition attacked the Bunker. The moron went in himself, killed Roland and got his hand lopped off."

"How?"

"117 got cognitively re-calibrated," Athena said. Michael cocked an eyebrow. "087 hit him really, really hard in the head. With his own arm."

"Yeouch. So where do we come in?"

"We're going to the _Infinity_ to retrieve a Siren. Or both of them, if we can. And Halsey and 'Mdama. And maybe an Engineer or two, should the opportunity present itself."

"Ooh! Yay! Field Trip!"

Athena rolled her eyes as she started off, the younger rogue Spartan trailing after her.

_Hyper lethal vector..._ _emphasis on '_hyper_'_...

* * *

Dayum. That was hard to get through... So... John's back! Yaaaaay! :D And Fred's gonna be juuuuuust fine. Seriously, he will. He'll make thick-skull jokes for the rest of the story.

And, by-the-by: OH SNAP, IS THAT NOBLE SIX?! And he a bad guy. Yes. No. Maybe. Who knows? :P Lol, I love mindfuckage almost as much as 2K (Refer to Bioshock 1 through Infinite). :D

Also, which DLC would people like to see our lovely gents and lasses deal with the most? Tina's Assault? Torgue's Campaign of Carnage? Scarlett's Treasure...? Hammerlock's Hunt? OR all of the above? (Totes planning on doing the TTAoDP)

So, um... I've got plans to make it more high-stakes, I suppose. And anyone got a problem with Lilith and Lasky possibly getting together by the end of this? Yes? No? I mean, it's not like he's unattractive... I think he looks a bit like Jason Bateman (who's admittedly not the most handsome actor ever, but he doesn't look too bad), but that's just me. Meh. Maybe that'll just be "DLC Content" so to speak. Not sure yet. SO! What did we all think? REVIEWS, PLEASE!


End file.
